It was going to be New Year’s Day in a few days. The General Hospital of Artillery was gradually filled with a relaxed atmosphere, with various lights and colored decorations used to celebrate the festival. Maybe it was because of the strong festive atmosphere that Zhang Yuze and Xu Li could finally enjoy a few days of silence in the company of each other, without fighting or violence. However, they still bickered every day.
In the end, both of them ended up as jointly responsible for getting Xiao Jie familiar with the work. Although Zhang Yuze had a cold face, he was professional enough when it came to academics. As for Xu Li, although he was a fool, he was strong enough when it came to work. Under the guidance of the two of them, Little Comrade Xiao Jie made rapid progress, looking as if he had divine help.
Of course, before starting his internship, Xiao Jie was a little white flower who couldn’t even stand to hear a curse word, but now, under the influence of the Two Gods of Curssing, he had completely let himself go.
Zhao Xiaole: “There are no chicken drumsticks in the cafeteria today.”
Xiao Jie: “Hot damn, what the hell is going on?!”
Zhang Yuze: “Oh.”
In the blink of an eye, it was time for the company’s annual meeting, taking place on the last day of the year, just before New Year’s Day. Doctors who usually fought against death every day had a rare moment of relaxation, able to start the day as usual in the morning, but end it with a holiday in the afternoon. Only the comrades from the Emergency Department were left to work on the front line. Everyone laughed, exchanged gifts, and had a great time.
While in the venue, Xu Li found what he was good at, seizing every opportunity to flourish like crazy. Say hello to this one, wave to that one, call each other brothers and sisters, full of enthusiasm. His whole body was piled with gifts from the girls, and he sat down with a smile on his face, exuding charm.
Since Zhang Yuze was in the same department as him, he had no choice but to sit next to that hormone-making machine. Wanting to pour cold water on Xu Li, he complained: “Your smile is like a bowl of egg drop soup with the flowers scattered.”
Xu Li: “Some people only received a few gifts and they now want to make fun of me.”
Zhang Yuze: “Oh hehe.”
However, that was the pure, cold truth. Because of his personality, Zhang Yuze only received gifts from Zhao Xiaole and Xiao Jie. Compared to the pile of gifts surrounding Xu Li, he actually seemed a bit shabby. Xu Li glanced at him and continued: “Forget it, for the sake of you and me being colleagues, I’ll give you something out of mercy.” After saying that, he put his hand into his trouser pocket, groped back and forth for a while, and took something out. A small pink square.
Zhang Yuze: “…”
Xu Li: “…”
“It’s really good to pay attention to protection. You have to wear a condom even while attending the annual meeting.” Zhang Yuze sighed.
“Shut up, I took it out by mistake!” Xu Li gritted his teeth and pocketed the little square, handing over a small keychain.
Zhang Yuze held it in his hand and looked at it for a while. Assistant Xu glared at him with an expression that seemed to say: “Look, I’ve prepared a gift for you. Come over here and express your gratitude.”
“Very good,” Zhang Yuze said, “If the back of it didn’t have “New Century Children’s Hospital” written on it, I would have believed that you bought it especially for me.”
Xu Li laughed and said: “Don’t be too grateful. Seeing others handing out gifts, I felt moved. Just put it on, it looks so good.” Xu Li couldn’t help but laugh at his hard work.
“I really want to throw it in your face, why don’t you walk around with it hanging from your neck?” Zhang Yuze simply wanted to beat him, and he would have done it if it wasn’t for their sixty-year-old dean who was summarizing the past on the stage, with tears in his eyes. After years of brilliant achievements and ardent hopes for everyone, he directly took action and started complimenting the hospital’s camaraderie spirit, essentially killing Zhang Yuze’s rebellious thoughts.
In the end, in clear view of everyone, they could only pinch each other for a while, but when it came to the game part, their hospital had an inexplicable evil idea. The organizers insisted on holding a knowledge quiz at the annual meeting, and everyone had to answer professionally and to a standard, comparable to the final week exam in college.
How many years have passed since they graduated from school?! Suddenly, the whole venue found the fear of being dominated by medical textbooks even at the annual meeting.
It was a game of “If you can’t answer it, you’ll be embarrassed in front of your peers. But if you want to answer it, you first have to be able to remember it.” There was no way, everyone was trying to avoid making eye contact for fear of getting chosen as a sacrifice, and in the end, the organizers had no choice but to recruit people to the stage by randomly selecting work ID numbers.
Xu Li glanced at him and asked: “I gave you a keychain, where’s my gift?”
Zhang Yuze said affectionately: “I’ll give you 30 million.” But his mind could only circle a plea to the gods: “Don’t get chosen… Don’t get chosen…”
“I’m sorry, I’ll definitely suffer retribution for forgetting to buy you something.” He continued.
Xu Li looked like he had eaten a big plate full of steaming cow dung.
Zhang Yuze was happy to enjoy one of the few chances to leave Xu Li speechless. However, as soon as his good mood returned, his job ID number appeared on the big screen.
? ? ?
Xu Li laughed loudly, slapped Zhang Yuze’s thigh hard, and said: “I think the retribution came fast enough! Go ahead, Doctor Zhang, go to the stage and let everyone look at you like you’re a monkey!”
Zhang Yuze’s leg was numb from the slap, but he still had to stand up. Grabbing on Xu Li’s ear, he mumbled: “Get out of my way, it hurts so much.”
A few more people were chosen by the merciless Gods of Retribution, so a row of them stood nervously on the stage, preparing to welcome a large-scale social death scene.
The first few questions were simple since they only had to fill in some blanks with concepts. Fortunately, they still had that knowledge. However, Zhang Yuze knew the Q&A session was far from easy. He had always been too lazy to open his mouth to compete, so just like a primary school student, he kept silent, only answering a few sentences when no one else was talking, accumulating some meager points.
But the last short-answer question required accurate wording to score points… And the score was also the highest, a full thirty points, which meant that if one answered the last question correctly, they would win no matter what. Zhang Yuze felt that the rule design was simply sick. It gave people the aesthetic feeling of fetching water in vain, with the assistance of an old, rotten bamboo basket.
Host: “Please listen to the question, everyone!”
Others: “Come on, we’re ready!”
Zhang Yuze: “Oh.”
Host: “Please analyze the emergence of love from a psychological perspective.”
The question was not difficult in itself, but it was indeed difficult to recite it word for word from the book. Everyone talked about it for a long time, but they couldn’t fully explain the link between hormones and nerves.
Zhang Yuze thought for a moment, took the microphone, and said: “From a physiological and psychological perspective, love is triggered by neurotransmitter hormones, such as oxytocin, norepinephrine, vasopressin, dopamine, and endorphins. A kind of feeling that is caused by the timing and proportion of the secreted hormones.”
Moderator: “Awesome.”
Others: “Awesome.”
There was thunderous applause. Doctor Zhang scored 30 points and won directly but in fact, he was not that powerful. It’s just that when he got dumped by Shen Mo, Zhang Yuze tried to find out the reason day and night. How could two people who once claimed to love each other so much end up hurting and cheating on each other?!
So he read through any book about love he could find, and that concept was still fresh in his mind. From then on, Dr. Zhang understood that love was just a kind of hormone. As soon as the hormone disappeared, love was gone. All the oaths of love were fake.
Conclusion: Who needed love?!
And for those who were wondering, that was the reason why Dr. Zhang had been single since getting dumped in college. Understanding that a fast heartbeat was just the stimulation and deception of hormones, Zhang Yuze could no longer convince himself to fall in love with anyone.
The host held a big rabbit doll, handed it to him, and asked Dr. Zhang to give an acceptance speech. But Zhang Yuze rarely talked, and standing on top of the stage with a crowd of people staring at him, he couldn’t say anything. He thought for a while, then simply expressed his thoughts on the topic just now, saying: “There is no acceptance speech. Let me talk about my own views on love. To put it simply, it’s the deception of hormones. There is no real deep love between husband and wife. I wish you all the best. Keep your eyes open, don’t be swayed by this kind of emotion, and don’t give too much irrationally. In the end, you’ll only be hurt.”
Zhang Yuze finished his speech, ignored the incomprehensible expressions of the audience, and returned the microphone to the host. In the end, the lonely man walked back to his place holding the rabbit doll. The atmosphere was awkward for half a minute before it became active again with the help of the host.
Xu Li’s expression was rarely serious, and he didn’t criticize him, only staring with interest. Zhang Yuze was annoyed by the stare, so he threw the doll in his arms and hit him in the face, saying: “Take your New Year’s gift quickly.”
Xu Li smiled, hugged the doll, and said: “Where are you going when this is over?”
Zhang Yuze rolled his eyes: “I’ll go eat shit, why do you care?”
Xu Li: “Which toilet? I have something to ask you.”
Zhang Yuze: “…You want to fight again, right? What do you want from me?”
Xu Li said aggrievedly: “It might be something related to work, you know?!”
Hearing that, Zhang Yuze answered with an expressionless face: “Oh, then you can contact me on corporate WeChat. I just want to go home and sleep.”
“No, you just want to go home and sleep on New Year’s Eve? Are you an old man?!”
“Assistant Xu wants to call a few boys to have a party?” Zhang Yuze glanced at him and said.
However, Xu Li was still serious. After thinking for a while, he said: “I have no appointments for tonight, it seems…”
“Get out!” Zhang Yuze rolled his eyes at him.
Xu Li smiled and continued: “I really haven’t made an appointment with anyone. I’m spending New Year’s Eve alone. Would Dr. Zhang be willing to accompany me?”
“Are you sick?” Zhang Yuze sighed sincerely. “I don’t want to fight on New Year’s Eve to cheer you up.”
“Anyway, we don’t have anyone to accompany us, so we can only make ends meet together. Do you think I can’t wait to book a table and treat you to a meal?”
Hearing that, Zhang Yuze chuckled and answered: “Let’s make a deal first, or we’ll start a fight at the restaurant later. Since you want to take me out, then you have to pay.”
“I’ll cover it, okay?” Xu Li patted his chest to reassure Zhang Yuze.
The long annual party ended with a burst of colorful flowers. Afraid of being talked to and wasting time, Xu Li pulled Zhang Yuze and left, still holding the big doll tightly with one hand.
“Where’s your car?” Zhang Yuze asked after watching him leave the hospital gate.
“Driving in this traffic jam?” Xu Li glanced at him, got on his motorcycle, and threw a helmet over.
This time around, Zhang Yuze took a closer look at the big red Harley, only to realize with disbelief that the ride was as cool as its owner. Many places were modified and upgraded. Xu Li even installed a row of ambient lights in front of the motorcycle, which shone extremely brightly. He couldn’t help it anymore and asked: “How many little boys have you carried in the back seat of your ride?”
“Stop talking nonsense and hold this for me.” Xu Li rolled his eyes and forced the toy from his arms to Zhang Yuze’s. Doctor Zhang could only put on his helmet and hug that thing under his arm in disgust. “Where are your other gifts?” He asked.
“Gave them to Zhao Xiaole and Xiao Jie. They are all snacks that girls and little kids like to eat. I’m not interested.” Xu Li replied.
Zhang Yuze: “Then why keep this doll? Give it to Zhao Xiaole as well.”
However, Xu Li smiled and answered: “That won’t work. It’s a rare gift from an old enemy. I have to keep it.”
Zhang Yuze rolled his eyes: “You’re making me sick.”
While on top of the motorcycle, Dr. Zhang was not one of those little boys from the bar, preferring to sit eight feet away from Xu Li. Assistant Xu turned around, forced his hand to his waist, and said angrily: “If you don’t want to fall to death, just hug my waist, idiot.”
Zhang Yuze: “Then I’ll just fall to death.”
Xu Li: “…”
The motorcycle was indeed very fast, weaving in and out of traffic and arriving at the restaurant very quickly. Surprisingly, Xu Li was actually willing to book the most expensive revolving restaurant in the city.
Zhang Yuze: “First of all, you agreed to treat me. If you dare to pretend to be drunk and go to the toilet only to run away, I’ll skin you.”
Xu Li looked at him helplessly, took out his bank card, and pressed it to the front desk: “Is this fine?”
Zhang Yuze: “Is the balance enough?”
Xu Li: “Damn Zhang Yuze, this is a credit card!”
Zhang Yuze immediately changed his mind: “Then, is it an overdraft?”
In the end, Xu Li was furious: “Fuck you!”
