Bo Xinghang listened in silence to the voice on the other end of the phone.
His father’s suicide had occurred a long time ago—so long that he could now discuss it with Doctor Ji calmly. Yet hearing it brought up again by his mother still stung.
The discomfort made him instinctively reach for a cigarette. He felt his pocket but found nothing, leading to a moment of disorientation.
In the morning, he took the pants with the cigarettes in the pocket to the bathroom to be washed. When he saw the cigarettes, he didn’t hesitate to throw them straight into the trash.
Breaking a habit was tough. Despite his intentions and statements about quitting smoking, he still found himself craving a cigarette in moments like this.
Smoke, smoke, smoke, my ass.
He wanted to slap himself.
He pulled his hand back, feeling a surge of emotions he couldn’t express, which made him sound extremely irritated. Even though it was his mother on the other end of the line, he didn’t hold back. “It has nothing to do with me. If you want to go, then damn well go yourself.”
There was another pause on the other end as if she were thinking.
“…Don’t you hate him?”
Bo Xinghang: “…”
Hate? Of course, he hated him.
He hated him so much that he wanted to confront his father and grab him by the collar, asking, “Why did you do this?” He hated it so much that his eyes were red when he deleted all his accounts, wanting to disconnect from everything and start over.
What a dumbass.
At the time, it was just youthful arrogance. Looking back now, it seems like mere chuunibyou.
He didn’t want to keep wandering in the shadows of the past.
Family, friends, even strangers, all unintentionally bring you happiness and hope. It’s only when you stop walking the path of resentment that you realize darkness isn’t pitch-black; it’s just a veil you wear.
If you cover your eyes with your own hands, how can the world show you light?
During that dark period, his condition only worsened. It was only when he let go of those things and looked around that he found someone as wonderful as Doctor Ji.
“Mom,” he said seriously, rarely using such a tone with her, “Let it go.”
“I know how painful it is for someone who doesn’t smoke to start, and I understand how painful it is for someone who once spoke softly to now curse and shout.”
“Mom,” Bo Xinghang’s heartbeat quickened, “Neither of us is to blame. Let’s both just let it go.”
By the time Bo Xinghang returned home with the bag of rice, the conversation between Grandma Bo and Doctor Ji had ended.
Both had fallen silent, unsure of what to say, until Bo Xinghang’s knock at the door broke the moment.
Grandma Bo quickly stood up, whispering, “It’s not our place to judge what happened with them, but no matter what, your duty as a doctor is to save lives.”
“Thank you for saving him.”
Ji Wenzhen watched as Grandma went to open the door, catching sight of the young man entering. In the brief moment that Grandma wasn’t looking, the young man winked at him, making him chuckle. Satisfied, the young man took the rice into the kitchen.
The young man’s silhouette was blurred by the frosted glass door, but his lean figure was still visible.
Ji Wenzhen kept his eyes on him, observing his movements and expressions.
In fact, when he listened to Grandma talk about Nan Ming, he didn’t feel any emotional turmoil. However, the more he thought about it, the more his heart ached.
It wasn’t because he pitied the boy.
The boy had survived that period on his own and didn’t need anyone’s sympathy or pity. Ji Wenzhen just wanted to hold him close, kiss him, and ask if carrying the rice was tiring, if it was too much work.
That would be enough.
My boy is strong and doesn’t need anyone’s sympathy.
–
The happy times spent with Doctor Ji always seemed too brief. As a third-year high school student with less than two months until the college entrance exam, the most important thing was… studying.
Bo Xinghang had taken two days off but was persuaded by Doctor Ji to return to school on the afternoon of his birthday.
Feeling utterly wronged, Bo Xinghang tapped the floor angrily with his shoe. The fluffy pink slippers his grandma had bought him lacked any intimidation factor and only made him look cute.
“…I just want to rest for two days! I’m not going!”
Doctor Ji sat on the soft bed, his posture upright and dignified. Wearing home pajamas, he looked more like a nobleman relaxing in a palace than a distant figure.
Nobleman Ji’s gaze lingered on the boy’s pink slippers for a few seconds before he looked up, his tone firm. “You’re about to take the college entrance exam.”
The exam.
Bo Xinghang stopped fidgeting, still somewhat reluctant. His voice dropped to a low murmur, “… But I just want to spend more time with you.”
His words were almost a whisper, but given how close he was to Doctor Ji, they were clearly heard.
It was as if he were acting spoiled.
Doctor Ji couldn’t resist when Bo Xinghang was like this. He took his hand, gently pulling him to his feet. The young man then sat on Doctor Ji’s lap, wrapping his arms around his neck.
The position was perfect for kissing. Doctor Ji tilted his head slightly, his jawline creating a graceful curve, and kissed Bo Xinghang on the lips.
“Xiao Xing, be good. I’ll take you out to have fun after your exams.”
“Go out to have fun?!” Bo Xinghang’s eyes lit up. He was kissed a few more times by Doctor Ji, feeling dizzy.
“Mm, I’ll take our Xiao Xing out.”
“But…” Bo Xinghang hesitated. “What about your work?”
Doctor Ji gently stroked the boy’s head with his slender fingers and then placed a kiss on his neck. He spoke in a calm voice, “That’s why Xiao Xing needs to study hard. I’ve rescheduled my days off to be after June, so we can go out together then.”
Doctor Ji’s kisses on his neck were ticklish, but Bo Xinghang’s eyes drooped. “Does that mean I won’t get to see you?”
Could anyone be more unfortunate than him?
Their relationship was confirmed only to be separated on the very first day. Worse yet, they couldn’t even live together now! They were “cohabiting” before but were now facing a “long-distance” relationship.
Could anyone be more pitiful than poor Xiao Xing?
No one.
So poor Xiao Xing decided to resist. “How about I go to school and wait for you at the hospital in the evening?”
He had thought about it before. Now that his grandma was back, he planned to change jobs. She had a pension, and he had a little savings. Finding another job wouldn’t be difficult and wouldn’t take up late-night hours.
Being young and full of energy, he could wait for Doctor Ji to finish work and then try to go home together.
It was a good plan, but Doctor Ji frowned. “No, you have your exams coming up. Even if you don’t study when you get home, you need to rest well. No fooling around.”
“I’m not tired!”
The thought of a long-distance relationship gave Bo Xinghang a headache, so he protested even louder while still in Doctor Ji’s arms. “I’ll go back to school right away! But when I come home at night, I want to see you. Let me go, really, I’m not tired. You have to believe me!”
“…”
Bo Xinghang leaned in to plant a kiss on the corner of Doctor Ji’s eye, trailing down to his nose, mouth, lips, chin, and finally to his fair neck. He gave a hard, vengeful suck, making Doctor Ji hiss.
“…Did that hurt?”
Doctor Ji tightened his grip around Bo Xinghang’s waist and soothed him gently. “It didn’t hurt. Be good and just wait for me at home in the evening, okay?”
Wait for Doctor Ji at home?
Bo Xinghang lifted his head quickly, his amber eyes sparkling with joy. “I’ll stay at your place after school?!”
Doctor Ji raised an eyebrow. “Where else would you stay?”
He had already said it was their home, and he meant it.
He never made empty promises.
Even when Bo Xinghang had asked absentmindedly, “Are we family?” Doctor Ji had never given a false answer.
“I thought…” Bo Xinghang lowered his head, “I thought I’d have to come back here.”
“Oh, Grandma just told me she plans to stay with Granny Li in a few days. You should know her.”
“…She just told you that?”
“Mm.” Doctor Ji remained calm and composed, staring at the young man. “So you can feel at ease staying at our home.”
Our home.
Hearing those words, Bo Xinghang kissed Doctor Ji again in delight. Then, feeling he might be too forward, he awkwardly stood up and grabbed his backpack, slinging it over his shoulder.
“Doctor Ji, I’m going to school now.”
Ji Wenzhen looked at him in his fluffy pajamas and laughed, nodding. “Mm, but aren’t you going to change out of your pajamas?”
Bo Xinghang’s face flushed a deep red, but he insisted, “…I didn’t forget!”
“Oh, I never said you did.”
“….”
“Should I leave so you can change?”
“…”
In front of Doctor Ji, Bo Xinghang always seemed to blush uncontrollably. While he was a cool guy around others, in front of Doctor Ji, he turned into a little puppy.
Little Puppy Bo hesitated for a moment but eventually muttered an “Mm.”
Once he was dressed in his school uniform and putting on his shoes in the entryway, Doctor Ji looked at the back of the boy’s still-flushed neck and, suppressing a smile, asked, “Did you bring your keys?”
Bo Xinghang looked up.
Due to Doctor Ji’s unpredictable work schedule, he had given Bo Xinghang a spare key so he could come and go as he pleased.
Bo Xinghang reached into his pocket, felt the cool metal, and slowly gripped it. The warmth from his palm gradually warmed the metal.
He thought about how so many little things in life made him genuinely happy.
He raised an eyebrow and flashed a carefree smile. “Yeah, I’ve got it.”
