He had seen this notebook before. Wen Qingying used it to take notes while he read. Tao Ling flipped through it casually and accidentally reached the last page.
There was something written there, right in the middle. It looked somewhat lonely, and the blank space all around it was like a wasteland.
After seeing the content clearly, Tao Ling was stunned and couldn’t help but look up.
Wen Qingying’s back was as tall and straight as when he first saw him. Because he had touched and hugged him, Tao Ling knew how stable his shoulders were and how strong his narrow waist was.
He especially wanted to lean on him.
After looking for a while, Tao Ling struggled to remove his gaze from Wen Qingying, then took a pen to write in another line of words right beneath the original sentence.
Soon, Wen Qingying began to move the flower pots. Tao Ling got up and went to help, but Wen Qingying gently pushed his shoulder against his and blocked him. Tao Ling said, dissatisfied: “So I can’t move it at all?”
Wen Qingying seemed to know what he was complaining about, so he wrinkled his nose slightly and pointed at the fresh cut flowers outside.
Tao Ling couldn’t help but want to laugh, but he habitually wanted to keep a straight face and finally bit his lower lip to stop the corners of his mouth from rising. This action had never appeared on his face before, and he didn’t know it at the moment, but his expression was captured by Wen Qingying.
Finally, he was about to get up but was caught off guard by Wen Qingying kissing him on the cheek.
Tao Ling was stunned, turned his head to look at the empty store entrance, then turned back to see Wen Qingying with a clean expression, as if he had done nothing at all.
After staring at each other for two seconds, Tao Ling knocked him on the forehead in revenge, and immediately went to the door to pick up the flower bucket.
After packing up the items, Tao Ling washed his hands and left the bathroom, and saw Wen Qingying pulling down the roller shutter.
“Hm? You’re not leaving?” He said while taking out his phone to ask.
Wen Qingying had also just washed his hands. Seeing this, he immediately took his phone and put it aside, then leaned over to hug him.
Tao Ling immediately put his arm around his neck and buried his face in his shoulder. Only then did he suddenly realize that he had been looking forward to this hug the whole day.
He was extremely surprised. It turned out that he liked hugs so much. It was obvious that he usually disliked physical contact with people. Maybe it was just because the other person was Wen Qingying.
After quietly hugging for a long time, Tao Ling struggled slightly, and the embrace separated a little. Wen Qingying lowered his head.
The touch was moist and slightly cool.
After dinner, they walked towards home. When they were almost at the gate of the community, Tao Ling sent a message: “I haven’t been to your house yet.”
Wen Qingying held a glass vase and did not reply immediately after reading the message. He just pursed his lips lightly.
Tao Ling looked at his expression and found something. He then typed: “It’s okay. I’ll wait until you’re ready. For now, let’s go to my house. Wanna watch a movie?”
His mind wasn’t there when he wrote that last sentence. He suddenly felt something was wrong after he sent it. He immediately clicked to withdraw it, but Wen Qingying had already seen it and replied: “What to watch?”
Tao Ling smiled: “What do you want to watch?”
“What do you like to watch, sir?” Wen Qingying asked.
Tao Ling felt a little disappointed and replied: “I only watched half of Wuthering Heights previously. Watch it with me then.”
Wen Qingying nodded, and the two of them headed into the elevator to go up.
On the sofa, Tao Ling leaned into Wen Qingying’s embrace. Wen Qingying put his arm around his shoulders, and they watched the movie together.
This person was right next to him, but Tao Ling suddenly felt that he was far away. After thinking for a long time, although he was still staring at the screen, his spirit seemed to be divided into two halves. One half was speculating what Wen Qingying felt in the silent world, and the other half was a very strange feeling when he pondered it carefully.
It was grief.
He really wanted to ask Wen Qingying why he couldn’t go to his house, but this wasn’t his character, so he couldn’t ask.
Halfway through the movie, Wen Qingying seemed to notice his absent-mindedness, moved away slightly, and looked down at him.
Tao Ling felt his gaze but didn’t turn his head to look at him.
After a long silence, Wen Qingying raised his hand and gently cupped his face. Tao Ling had to look up. The two looked at each other and kissed again. At the end, their lips parted, and Tao Ling sat back a little and leaned on the back of the sofa.
The phone vibrated, and Wen Qingying said, “Sir, can I invite you to my house?”
Tao Ling turned his head and saw the clean smile on his face. He couldn’t stop himself in time, and leaned over to lick his canine teeth before immediately getting off the sofa and heading to the bathroom.
After Tao Ling came out, the two went outside again.
Wen Qingying took Tao Ling through the small road next to the community, turned a corner, almost bypassed the entire community, and finally returned to the intersection of the street with the flower shop.
Tao Ling was a little confused at first, and became more and more surprised until he passed the intersection and walked to the right, and finally confirmed his thoughts. He wanted to laugh a little, lowered his head, and typed: “So it’s not on the way at all, but you still always sent me home?”
Wen Qingying blinked after reading this, and nodded after a long while.
The waves in his heart surged again, and before Tao Ling could calm down his emotions, the two had already entered the community.
Wen Qingying lived on the sixth floor, with two bedrooms and a living room, much smaller than Tao Ling’s place, but very clean and tidy; only the many books on the table were a little messy. If they weren’t flipped open and lying facedown on the table, then they would have a bookmark stuck in the middle.
It seemed like he was reading several books at the same time.
As soon as the door closed, Wen Qingying went over to collect the books, but Tao Ling had already seen the general situation.
He had almost all of those books. The covers of several books were Tai Chi diagrams. Tao Ling was very familiar with them. They were Taoist classics published by Zhonghua Book Company. In addition, there were books on religious experience and shamanic spiritual research, all of which Tao Ling had introduced in class.
There was another stack of printed things next to it. Tao Ling took two steps closer and found that it was the courseware he had copied to Wen Qingying some time ago.
Tao Ling turned around and suddenly saw another book next to the sofa. The first few words of the book title were “Trauma Therapy.”
Before he could see clearly, Wen Qingying turned around with the book in his arms and finally found the book behind him. He immediately stretched out his arm and grabbed it. Without even looking at Tao Ling, he immediately piled it in front of him and carried it into the bedroom.
Tao Ling stood in the middle of the living room. After a while, Wen Qingying came out, pulled him to sit down, and took the cup on the table into the kitchen.
The kitchen wasn’t big. Wen Qingying was tall, and he always looked a little uncomfortable standing in it.
He was holding a kettle and getting water when Tao Ling suddenly came from behind him, hugged his waist tightly, and put his chin on his shoulder. His breath brushed past his ear.
“Wen Qingying,” Tao Ling said, “I love you.”
Wen Qingying was startled, and the kettle in his hand fell down with a loud bang.
Tao Ling thought that his action disturbed him, so he immediately raised his hand to turn off the water, pulled him around, and hugged him alarmedly.
He was almost thirty, and while he didn’t know whether or not he was calm, the door to his heart was definitely closed.
He had thought that he would never say this sentence, but after he hastily uttered it, he found that his heart surged to the extreme.
Relying on Wen Qingying’s inability to hear, he suddenly became unscrupulous. With a sour yet full heart, he said in one breath, “No matter what trauma or illness you have, even if you aren’t able to speak nor hear for this entire lifetime, it doesn’t matter. It’s fine if you don’t tell me anything either. I’ll still love you.”
“I think I have loved you since the day I first saw you.”
“As you gave me flowers, I gave you my heart.”
“I’ve never loved anyone before, and I mean the romantic kind of love.”
After saying this, Tao Ling was silent for a long time, took a breath, and finally said, “Wen Qingying, you must always like me, please.”
His face has been buried in Wen Qingying’s neck, so he couldn’t see Wen Qingying’s expression, but he could feel the arms around his arms tightening. Not to be outdone, he also used all his strength to hug his shoulders and back until it was tighter.
Until their body temperatures were one and the same.
That night, when he got home, Tao Ling thought of what he had said as he lay down.
Now that he was alone, he calmed down. He suddenly felt that his words and actions were too dramatic. If Wen Qingying could really hear him, he definitely wouldn’t have said that; otherwise, he would be ashamed to death.
Although every word was sincere.
It was Friday again, and Tao Ling’s class was the second to last. Under the bright white light, his emotionless voice spread throughout the classroom.
“When we have been talking about topics such as salvation and the exchange between man and god in Taoism, we are actually talking about mystical experiences. In other words, even if the monastic community is exercising social control, the individual at the source is still spiritual, and the mental state of the medium is ecstatic, and irrational things occupy an important position in it. Rationalist thinking is philosophical experience, but religious experience points to mysticism.”
“Mysticism is a commonality in various religions, which is why we can use Western religious theories to discuss Taoism. Religions in different cultural environments certainly have different characteristics, but we should also see the more essential things behind cultural differences. This kind of thing ultimately comes down to people themselves. In short, experience is a common experience of mankind.”
Speaking of this, Tao Ling suddenly remembered that someone seemed to have asked a related question before. At the same time, he glanced at the back row of the classroom, and after his sight passed Wen Qingying, it suddenly fell on the other corner of the classroom.
He was stunned, and the bell also just happened to ring.
“Class is over.” Tao Ling said and immediately lowered his head and sent a message to Wen Qingying: “Your little sister is here.”
When he looked up, Wen Qingying was looking at the other end of the classroom. He obviously saw Yun Nan.
Tao Ling hesitated and packed his things slowly, and saw Wen Qingying go out the back door first. Yun Nan waved to him and followed him out.
When they left the classroom, most of the students had already left. Tao Ling looked at the railing at the end of the corridor, and the brother and sister stood facing each other in silence.
Seeing him come out, Wen Qingying stood up straight, and Yun Nan turned around and shouted, “Teacher Tao.”
Tao Ling walked closer: “Hello, are you looking for your ge?”
“Yeah,” Yun Nan smiled and said, “So I also came over to listen to Teacher Tao’s lecture. I didn’t have the chance before. And what a coincidence; Teacher Tao’s last point just now solved a doubt for me.”
Tao Ling nodded as a response, with no expression on his face, thinking that he couldn’t hug Wen Qingying today.
The three of them went downstairs together and walked out to the street.
Yun Nan waved to Tao Ling, “Bye, Teacher Tao.”
Tao Ling: “Bye.”
Wen Qingying also had no choice but to wave back.
After walking a few steps, Tao Ling turned back and saw Wen Qingying taking Yun Nan in another direction. After a while, he turned around and went home.
The next day, the sign language training class would start, but Tao Ling couldn’t sleep even after taking sleeping pills. He felt irritated after tossing and turning for a long time, so he simply sat up and read.
Just after turning two pages, someone suddenly rang the doorbell outside. Tao Ling thought it was an auditory hallucination at first, but the sound didn’t stop. He was stunned, lifted the quilt, and got out of bed.
With a strong premonition, he opened the door and immediately welcomed a strong hug.
As the door closed, Tao Ling hugged Wen Qingying back in a daze.
At the end, they separated, and Wen Qingying kissed Tao Ling. He was about to leave, but Tao Ling followed him to the door and grabbed his hand.
Wen Qingying turned around, touched his face, and gently pursed his lips, typing on his phone, “I didn’t hug you tonight, so I’ll make up for it. Fortunately, I just met someone who swiped to enter the community. Sir, I have to go now; my sister is still at home.”
Tao Ling raised his head and kissed him, then watched him go out, then entered the study and went to the balcony. He soon saw his back as he left.
Who knew if the hug contained some kind of magic, but when Wen Qingying had returned home and reported that he was safe, Tao Ling huddled in the quilt again, and began dreaming in less than half an hour.
He got up early the next day to go to the Cultural Hall, following the signs to the door of the sign language class, and before he stepped in, he looked at the stage. Tao Ling was stunned.
TL: thanks for your patience everyone, my workload’s been pretty heavy lately ;;
