Classes for the day were finally over. And, for once, there was no ridiculous pool-cleaning duty. I could head straight home without anyone nagging me about it. A truly blissful sense of freedom.
“Hey, Yuichi, wanna hit up karaoke?”
“Nah, I decided yesterday I’m gonna go home and lounge around.”
“Seriously, you sound like an old man.”
I turned down Shoko’s invitation, grabbed my bag, and stood up from my seat.
“You should learn a thing or two from Kawase-san. Do something good for once! I’m honestly worried about you, y’know? Just one more hundred-point drop, and you’re headed straight to hell. You realize that, right?”
“Is this just how all women are? My mom, you, even God—always on my case?”
“Pfft. Here you go, trampling all over people’s kindness. Tsk, tsk, that’s another minus point for you.”
“Eh, hell doesn’t sound too bad. I wouldn’t have to listen to lectures from anyone down there.”
And with that, we split ways, tossing a few more sarcastic quips at each other. What a troublesome world we live in. If you’re not contributing to society, you’re seen as worthless. It’s like we don’t even get a say.
I was thinking that as I walked toward the school gate, when I noticed a familiar face.
“Huff… huff…”
It was Kawase, carrying a big trash bag in both hands.
“…”
I walked over to her, half-amused, half-exasperated.
“Hey, going hard as usual, huh?”
“Oh, Hirano-san. Hello!”
Kawase stopped walking and gave me a polite greeting.
“Are you on trash duty?”
“Duty…? Not really, but I’m just helping out.”
“Thought so.”
Of course, she’s helping people left and right without a second thought.
What’s more impressive is that she does it all voluntarily. No one’s going to believe her if she says, “I’m not interested in points.” Even I find that hard to believe.
“—Kawase-saaaan, could you take care of the rest?”
A girl came out from the garbage collection spot and called out to Kawase.
“Oh, sure! See you later!”
“Thanks, see ya!”
The girl just left. Kawase readjusted her grip on the garbage bag with a little “Heave-ho.”
“Well, I should go toss this now.”
“—Hold up a sec.”
I quickly stopped Kawase, just as she was about to head to the garbage area.
—That girl just said something that stuck out to me.
“Who was that?”
“Oh, she’s in my class. She’s on trash duty this week.”
“Is anyone else on duty with her?”
“No, it’s just her. But since we have a lot of garbage this week, I thought I’d help out.”
“She said, ‘Could you take care of the rest?’ Does that mean there’s more?”
“Yes. Three more bags.”
Wait a second.
“That’s messed up.”
My voice dropped without me even realizing it.
“Why are you carrying the rest of the trash? If there are three bags, you should be carrying them together, right? Why’s the person on duty going home first?”
“Uh… well… three bags aren’t that much for just one person.”
“Didn’t you just say that it’s too much for one person, so you offered to help?”
“I-I’m fine, really.”
“…”
I could feel anger bubbling up inside me. Not just toward the girl who went home, but also toward this girl, Mai Kawase, right in front of me.
“Shoko said, ‘Just faking it gets you points,’ but you really take it to an extreme, don’t you?”
“I-I volunteered for this. I told her, ‘You can leave the rest to me.’”
“I know that.”
Otherwise, the girl would be blatantly dumping her duty onto Kawase. And nobody would willingly lower their points like that. This whole situation could only be happening because Kawase herself offered.
“Need I remind you, both of you earn the same amount of points for this.”
“Yes, I understand that.”
“Doesn’t that seem unfair to you?”
“I… I’m not really interested in points.”
Kawase said apologetically, like a kid getting scolded for doing something wrong, just like she looked on the train this morning.
…Damn it.
I clicked my tongue internally. I just told Shoko, didn’t I? I know I shouldn’t go around meddling in other people’s business. I don’t even have the right to lecture anyone. I get that.
But still, I couldn’t keep quiet.
“Listen, you’re just being used.”
“…”
“Did you hear what she said? ‘Thanks a lot!’ She doesn’t appreciate you at all. She’s probably forgotten about you by tomorrow. It’s not just today, is it? You probably did someone else’s chores yesterday too. Is this really okay with you?”
“I… I’m…”
Kawase’s eyes wavered with sadness, but she soon lifted her gaze to me, resolute.
“I’m only doing what I want to do.”
“…”
…Yeah. That’s how it is, huh.
I was certain then. She was just like…
—My sister.
Without a word, I took the garbage bag from Kawase’s hands.
“Oh, uh, excuse me…!”
Kawase’s voice was flustered as I suddenly took the bag.
“I’ll help.”
“Huh?”
“With the garbage.”
I turned my back to her and started walking toward the trash area.
“N-no, really, it’s fine! You don’t have to go out of your way…”
“I’m not doing it for you.”
“Huh?”
“I’m actually down to just 300 points. I could use a few, so I’m just helping to get them.”
“…”
Kawase quietly trailed behind me.
“—Thank you, Hirano-san.”
I didn’t have the courage to look back and see what expression she had when she said that.
After we dumped her class’s trash, we ended up heading to the station together. Kawase kept thanking me on the way.
“I told you, I only did it for myself. No need to thank me.”
“Even so, I’m glad you did. So… thank you.”
She walked beside me, smiling brightly.
“You’re off to volunteer at the senior home after this, right?”
“Yes.”
“Is volunteering fun?”
“It’s hard work sometimes, but it’s nice to be helpful.”
“Helpful, huh?” I felt that notion had become a bit outdated in my world.
“How many points do you have by now?”
I asked without much thought.
“Well…”
“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”
I stopped her. Asking about someone’s points is like asking their income; not everyone wants to disclose that.
“No, it’s okay… In my last dream evaluation, I was at about 4,200 points.”
“4,200!? Almost B-rank. That’s insane.”
So, she really was over 4,000. Fourteen times my own points.
“Does God ever compliment you for that?”
“Oh, you mean… God? Um, not really.”
“I get chewed out every time. They keep telling me I’ll end up in hell if I don’t raise my points.”
Mai giggled softly.
“They told me at my last dream evaluation that I should be careful not to get tripped up during the final test.”
“Final test?”
“They didn’t give me specifics, but there’s apparently some sort of final evaluation. They said, ‘But I’m sure you’ll be fine.’”
“Huh.”
A final test just for high-ranking people, huh? Sounds irrelevant to me.
“Hey, Hirano-san.”
“Yeah?”
Kawase called out to me, looking serious.
“Yesterday, you said, ‘You’ll regret it if you keep living like that.’ What did you mean by that?”
“Oh…”
Right, I’d said something unnecessary yesterday.
“Don’t worry about it. I didn’t mean much by it.”
“But…”
She looked down, clearly wanting to know more.
It was my fault for saying something so ambiguous. I might as well explain.
“Well, it might be too late to say this, but I just meant you’ll end up in situations like today.”
“Situations like today?”
“You’re getting used, and no one’s even thanking you for it. All you get out of it is more trouble.”
“Oh…”
It was probably a piece of advice that came way too late for Kawase. An awkward silence settled between us.
“You’re against the whole points system, aren’t you, Hirano-san?”
“Yeah, I am.”
“Is that because… you feel like people who do good deeds are just faking it?”
“It’s more that I hate how the points system has changed people’s mindset.”
“Mindset…?”
It seemed like she didn’t quite understand what I meant.
“If someone does something good, they deserve appreciation. Not in terms of points or some afterlife payoff, but pure, simple gratitude. Sounds cheesy?”
“Not at all.”
Kawase answered with a sincere look.
“But society’s the opposite now, right? People are good just to gain points, and no one’s grateful to anyone else. Because of the points, people’s mindsets have changed. It just feels… wrong.”
“…”
“And most of all, I hate that there are people who have to suffer because of it.”
“People like who?”
“You, obviously.”
“Huh?” Kawase looked at me, eyes wide with surprise.
“Because of all these people doing good only for themselves, genuinely helpful people like you get lumped together with them. I can’t help but feel like that’s a bit tragic, you know?”
That’s one of the reasons I dislike the points system.
The whole thing feels like it’s tainting people’s kindness, and I can’t bring myself to support it. It’s as if people aren’t actually helping others; they’re just helping themselves, and it all feels painfully hollow.
“You’re a good person, Hirano-san.”
“Huh? No, I’m not. I’m a 300-point lowlife.”
“Points don’t matter.”
Kawase looked straight into my eyes, her voice firm.
“Everyone I’ve met who dislikes the points system just finds it too much trouble or hates the thought of going to hell, so they resent the system itself. But Hirano-san, you’re not upset for yourself; you’re mad for others. You’re worried about other people. —Hirano-san, you’re a good person.”
“If you think that, then tell God at the next dream evaluation.”
Not used to praise, I started walking a bit faster, leaving Kawase behind for a moment.
The station came into view. Normally, Kawase and I would ride the same line to the next station together, but today she was taking a different line to volunteer. We’d part at the station entrance.
There was something I had to tell her before then.
“Hey.”
“Yes?”
We stopped at the crosswalk, cars zipping by in front of us.
“Helping people is fine, but don’t go too far with it.”
“Too far…?”
The light turned green, and people started crossing.
“Just don’t let your sense of helping people get numb. Self-sacrifice is different from ignoring yourself. Take care of yourself, and whatever you do—”
I was about to say, don’t ever put yourself in a dangerous situation just to help someone.
But I didn’t get the chance.
A speeding car wasn’t slowing down, even though the light was green for pedestrians. People in the crosswalk parted like a wave, leaving a woman alone in the center, staring at her phone. An urgent screech of brakes. Everything happened in slow motion. Even Kawase’s figure leaping forward to push the woman out of the way.
“—Onee-chan!”
I heard someone scream. Blood sprayed. I could smell it.
“Onee-chan! Onee-chan!”
I’d seen this scene before.
It was the worst day of my life. The day I grew to despise false kindness. The day I lost someone precious. And now, here it was again, playing out right before me.
“You must be happy now, Yuichi.”
I heard someone’s voice.
“Now, Onee-chan is in heaven.”
“Kawase!”
Screams rang out around me. The woman Kawase pushed away began to understand what had happened, her face paling in horror.
The driver stepped out, a middle-aged man in a suit, face drained of color, rushing toward us.
“Kawase! Hey, Kawase!”
Kawase lay on the crosswalk. There weren’t many visible injuries, barely any blood, but she seemed to have hit her head. Her eyes were shut, occasionally letting out a soft groan.
“I… I was just lost in thought, my project at work’s been a mess…” The driver muttered, stumbling over his words.
“Call an ambulance!”
I yelled at the driver, who was rambling nonsense.
“Get an ambulance! Now!”
“Oh… yeah… an ambulance… right.”
He fumbled, pulling out his phone from his bag.
“Kawase! Can you hear me?”
“…Hi…Hirano-san…”
Kawase slowly opened her eyes.
“My… bag…”
“Your bag? What about it? Stop talking; the ambulance will be here soon…”
“Could you… let them know… at the senior home…”
“What? What are you talking about?”
“I… I might not make it… today… sorry…”
What…?
“Are you stupid!? Do you understand what’s happening? Worry about yourself!”
“I’m sorry… I… didn’t mean to… be a bother…”
Kawase’s voice faded as she closed her eyes. Panic seized me as I quickly leaned in, checking her breathing. She was still breathing, probably just unconscious. Relief washed over me, followed by a burning anger.
At my own helplessness. At the points system. At God.
And above all, at this girl, Mai Kawase, who never put herself first.
