BTFB chapter 1

On this morning, as Zhao Qian was buying breakfast at a nearby breakfast shop near the company, snowflakes started falling from the sky, covering the gray sky of Jianghua City, which had been dull for the past three to five days.

This was the first snow of the winter and also the first snow Zhao Qian had witnessed since moving to Jianghua City.

Although Jianghua City was situated at a high altitude, its latitude fell within the subtropical range. While winters were cold and damp, it rarely experienced snowfall. However, this snowfall was quite decisive. The cold north wind carried clustered snowflakes, swirling wildly in all directions. It seemed as if the entire city’s air had turned semi-transparent white. The snowflakes landing on the roadside shrubs and grass didn’t immediately melt, accumulating and intensifying.

Zhao Qian pulled his neck into the scarf, turned slightly, and looked up at the snowflakes careening in the air. Some landed on his face, some settled intact on his coat, resembling pristine white pupae lying quietly.

Suddenly, Zhao Qian’s heart skipped a beat. He quickly took his hands out of his pockets, swatted off the snowflakes on his scarf with a few forceful strokes.

However, the snowflakes seemed undeterred by his actions and continued their unpredictable dance. Some flew in through the three-quarters-opened curtain of the breakfast stall, stifled in mid-air by the steam rising from the bamboo steamer; others managed to escape, landing on the cashier’s counter and turning into tiny droplets of water within a second.

“Why is it suddenly snowing today!” The shop assistant was flipping open the steamer, preparing the buns Zhao Qian ordered. “Haven’t seen snow in Jianghua for years; it’s a bit startling at first sight.”

However, the other pedestrians on the street seemed to have a different attitude. Men, women, old, and young all slowed their pace, wearing expressions of not wanting to disturb, looking up at the snowflakes dancing in clusters. Many even reached out to touch and catch them, as if touching something rarely sacred.

Zhao Qian straightened his body, smiling warmly, “Snow in a propitious year. It’s a good omen.”

The shop assistant placed the plastic bag containing two buns on the counter and, bending down, took out a sealed cup of soy milk from the cabinet:

“Six yuan in total.”

Zhao Qian picked up the breakfast from the counter, raised his phone with the payment record, and smiled at the shop assistant:

“I just mentioned a propitious year; let’s start the ‘abundance’ from me.”

The shop assistant’s eyes instantly lit up, happily forming two crescent shapes, and his tone became noticeably more spirited:

“Oh! Thank you, Dr. Zhao! We’ll also help promote your business when we have the chance!”

Zhao Qian had taken a half-step out but quickly turned back, pretending to be alarmed and waving his hand:

“No need, no need…”

Zhao Qian, as a partner, owned a private psychological clinic in a downtown office building in Jianghua City.

The clinic had comprehensive qualifications and excellent confidentiality. The higher floor provided a more pleasant view than the average clinic. One of the partners had a background in business, understanding marketing and the clinic’s positioning and clientele. The fees charged for treatment were well worth the rent in this prime location and the salaries of elite physicians.

It was December 24th, Christmas Eve. There was only one employee at the front desk, Xia Xia, and Zhao Qian was the only therapist working that day. There were no patients scheduled; the clinic operated on an appointment basis, and most patients preferred not to be noticed, so they usually scheduled their visits at specific times.

Xia Xia, a likable girl with deep dimples when she smiled, and round, bright eyes, wearing a white uniform, looked innocent and harmless, fitting the description of an “angel in white.”

Seeing Zhao Qian approaching, Xia Xia conscientiously took out the neatly organized patient information, handing it over with a smile:

“Dr. Zhao, there’s only one patient scheduled for today. I persuaded them when confirming the appointment to move the time to the morning. That way, we can both take the afternoon off! After all, spending the whole day in the clinic on Christmas Eve would be too miserable…”

Zhao Qian opened the folder, containing only a thin A4 sheet with basic patient information. There were no previous appointment records or treatment history. Even the description of the condition was brief – “Sleep disorder.”

After a quick glance, Zhao Qian closed the folder, exchanged greetings with Xia Xia, wished her a Merry Christmas, and headed to the treatment room.

It was Zhao Qian’s habit to have breakfast in the treatment room while reviewing the day’s patient information, preventing a rush when patients arrived.

However, this patient’s information was exceptionally simple; all the optional fields were left blank, and the name was only written as ‘B.’ The only interesting detail was the selection of the secondary gender – ‘Beta.’

Zhao Qian spread the folder on the table, opened the soy milk cup with a straw, tore off the cartoon-patterned seal cleanly. Holding the bun through the plastic bag, he took a bite one after another, staring at the patient’s information in a trance.

Who could it be?

Perhaps the more someone possessed, the harder it became to trust everything, including a doctor’s professional ethics. To accommodate certain clients’ requests, the clinic had made significant concessions in terms of confidentiality. Currently, only the patient’s real name and ID were stored in the appointment system, not in the information obtained by the doctor.

Just for the sake of convenience in communication, patients needed to provide a usable alias when making an appointment. It could be a nickname, a surname, or even a code. The previously provided ID and real name were encrypted information, only used for registration, in coordination with relevant authorities’ verification.

Zhao Qian looked at the patient information in front of him, and the more he looked, the stranger it seemed. In a moment of confusion, he even wondered if this person had come not for treatment but simply to meet him?

But Zhao Qian, as one of the transparent individuals serving the privileged, who would want to meet him?

Zhao Qian was truly troubled. He never wanted to get involved in political matters. If one of his patients held a prominent position, and someone came looking for him to inquire about the situation, how should he handle it?

The soy milk by his side slowly cooled down, and the mist rising from the cup gradually became thin.

The unlit treatment room was dark, even though the curtains were wide open. There was no bright sunlight streaming in, only the gloomy sky and scattered snowflakes outside the window.

Zhao Qian took a deep breath, picked up the soy milk and stood up, pacing to the floor-to-ceiling window in the treatment room.

There was no sign of the snow stopping, and it didn’t seem to be letting up. The air was hazy, and a thin layer of white covered the eaves of the buildings and the crowns of trees on the streets. The city rushed by as usual, but the hustle and bustle seemed a bit subdued.

Was it because of the snow? Perhaps not.

Today was Christmas Eve, and everyone was enjoying their time off, busy with family gatherings. The streets would naturally be quieter.

Zhao Qian chuckled self-mockingly, took a sip of the cool soy milk from the cup’s edge. It seemed like he had gotten used to a life without attachments in Jianghua, often forgetting that life could also be warm and happy.

The first snow of the season had fallen today, and it was beautiful.

But times had changed, and Zhao Qian didn’t know whom he could share such thoughts with anymore.

“Ah Yuan…” The treatment room’s door lock clicked twice, and the wooden door opened and closed.

Zhao Qian was about to turn around when the utterance of “Ah Yuan” froze his movements.

“Ah Yuan, is it you?” Footsteps approached, and the speaker’s low, trembling voice was unmistakable. It was like the cracking rocks accompanying the roar of a volcano rolling down the mountain.

Zhao Qian stiffened his neck, turned slowly and cautiously. It was as if he feared that making a big movement would cause this volcano to instantly rupture before his eyes.

“Hello,” Zhao Qian met the person’s burning gaze, his heart tightening. There was a somewhat extended pause in his words: “Mr. B, I am your treating doctor, Dr. Zhao Qian.”

“What Mr. B!” The person across from him seemed a bit indignant: “I am Bian Liming, don’t you recognize me?”

Zhao Qian cleared his throat, went to pick up the patient information on the table, and modified it with a pen. While lowering his eyes, he repeated in a warm tone:

“Alright, Mr. Bian, please have a seat here.” Zhao Qian finished writing, took the thin folder, and quickly walked to the sofa in the treatment room. Using the remote control, he turned on the lights, lowered his head to flip through his own notebook, and said, “Since you’re here, let’s begin.”

Bian Liming was stunned for a moment, stayed in place for a while, then turned around and slowly walked over, sitting down gently on the sofa next to Zhao Qian.

“I… When I came, I brought a cup of cappuccino for you, hot.” A coffee paper cup covered with a cup holder landed on the coffee table and was pushed in Zhao Qian’s direction: “Have you had breakfast? I don’t remember you having the habit of drinking soy milk for breakfast.”

Zhao Qian flipped to a new page in his notebook, spread it on his lap, and used the base of his palm to press against the notebook’s center seam: “Thank you, Mr. Bian, but I haven’t had coffee in a long time. You go ahead.” Zhao Qian adjusted his glasses and raised his head with a nonchalant expression: “Let’s talk about the issues you’d like to address. Feel free to drink and relax.”

Bian Liming remained silent, sitting on the sofa without leaning against the backrest. He leaned forward towards Zhao Qian, his eyes flickering with a dark light, and his eyelashes trembled slightly, like flames swaying in the wind.

“Ah Yuan…” After a while, Bian Liming only managed to utter these two words.

Zhao Qian let out a short breath, lowered his head, and began writing something in his notebook:

“Mr. Bian, my surname is Zhao, and I am called Zhao Qian.”

“Ah Yuan,” Bian Liming stubbornly continued to use this name, his trembling breath becoming increasingly apparent: “How could you leave without saying anything? You sold your house, your whole family disappeared. Do you know how long I’ve been looking for you!”

Zhao Qian lowered his head and fell silent for two seconds. His Adam’s apple slid up and down soundlessly. Putting down the pen, he raised his head:

“Mr. Bian, when did your sleep disorder start? You mentioned it when making the appointment.”

“Ah Yuan…” Bian Liming’s eyes were moist, and his tone became increasingly convoluted and obscure as he spoke: “What did I do wrong? You can scold or shout at me. But don’t disappear like this without saying a word. It’s been six years. I’ve been looking for you every day without a break…”

“Mr. Bian, I prefer you to call me Dr. Zhao.”

“Ah Yuan, can’t you stop being angry? Do you remember the time when we used to go to school together, come home together, and secretly smoke at the street corner? And that coffee shop we frequented, you said Americano was too bitter and bland, I said cappuccino was too rich. In the end, neither of us could convince the other. But no matter how we argued, we were always the best of friends… Do you remember?”

“Mr. Bian, given the impact of our previous relationship, we may not be able to proceed with counseling and treatment normally. There are other doctors and therapists in the clinic…”

“Ah Yuan!” Bian Liming, with red eyes, interrupted Zhao Qian, squatting in front of him. His hands pressed against the armrests of the single sofa on either side, adopting a blocking posture.

Bian Liming choked up a bit, and every word he spoke seemed stuck in his throat: “Ah Yuan, these six years, even once, have you ever thought about coming back to find me?”

“Mr. Bian…”

“Is Jianghua’s winter always this cold every year? Weren’t you afraid of the cold before? Can you adapt here?”

“Mr. Bian, you…”

“Ah Yuan, it’s Christmas Eve today. Can we spend it together again?”