As for how this day exactly ended, Zhao Yuan never recalled.
It seemed like the brain’s passive protective mechanism was triggered, scattering the poignant shock into chaotic fragments. When he finally came to his senses, the room was empty except for him, scattered snacks and beverages on the coffee table, and the incessant chatter on the TV.
Bian Liqin’s body was promptly escorted back to the country by fellow diplomats in the independent country of Honshu. Bian Liqin had signed an agreement for body donation before his passing, and Liming’s father and Bian Liming’s only had a brief encounter with him in the hospital.
Zhao Yuan wanted to find Bian Liming, spend some time with him, and offer comfort. He knew the taste of losing a loved one is not easily digestible, and the support at this time is crucial.
However, Bian Liming seemed to have suddenly become busy. As the second son of the Bian family and Liqin’s younger brother, he had many matters to attend to—interviews, receiving political friends who came to express condolences, organizing related letters and emails, and more.
Apart from that, even without a body, the Bian family organized a somewhat misplaced “body” farewell ceremony at home.
It was raining that day, but nonetheless, almost everyone on Dongshan Street was dressed in black, including Zhao Yuan.
Holding a transparent umbrella, Zhao Yuan arrived at the door, where, under the butler’s guidance, he put away the umbrella and changed into shoe covers.
There were already many guests in the living room of the Bian family. Two tables covered with tablecloths were placed against the wall, displaying some cold dishes and desserts. Bian Liming and his father stood on the other side, conversing calmly with the people who had gathered to express their condolences.
Bian Liming wore a well-fitted black suit, his hair neatly combed, his cheeks free of stubble, presenting a refined appearance. Zhao Yuan was relatively far from him. Bian Liming was busy dealing with guests and didn’t notice Zhao Yuan immediately.
Zhao Yuan silently walked to Bian Liqin’s portrait.
In the nearby nanmu coffin, there was no one lying, only neatly arranged clothes that Bian Liqin had worn during his lifetime. In the square space surrounded by red velvet, there was a neatly folded white shirt, a brown leather belt, well-ironed suit pants, and a pair of old leather shoes that had already creased.
Zhao Yuan remembered that summer afternoon when Bian Liqin came to wish his grandmother a happy birthday, holding an enamel vase from his home. Bian Liqin, who knew that his brother was not close to him, still worked hard to climb up, holding onto every clue, all for the sake of makingBian Liming’s life a bit smoother in secret.
Bian Liqin, so dazzling and perfect, no one could find fault with him; yet, he always bowed humbly, even with an outstanding height, never looking down on anyone.
Zhao Yuan’s heart ached with regret and sorrow for Bian Liqin. This brother, so gentle and silently nurturing; there would be no more chances to express love for him in such a quiet way.
Bian Liming, so proud, a child with a deep lack of security; now, one less family member who secretly cared for him, always unconditionally supporting him.
Unconsciously, tears blurred Zhao Yuan’s vision. A dim light shone on the neatly arranged white shirt in the coffin, and with a “plop,” a tear fell on it.
“You’re here.” A familiar voice sounded behind him, andBian Liming’s hand rested on his shoulder.
Zhao Yuan sniffed softly and turned to face Bian Liming. “How are you holding up?”
Bian Liming withdrew the hand on his shoulder, smiled slightly, and said, “I’m tired. I’ve been busy with so many things these days. My father is too busy, I didn’t know his daily work was so hectic. So, I’ve been handling most of my brother’s affairs—organizing his belongings, interviews, and replying to emails… This period should be the time I’ve spent the most with Liqin.”
Zhao Yuan’s nose began to tingle again. Life is like this; sometimes fate is not genuinely moved by sincerity, no matter how dedicated a person was during their lifetime.
“Bian Liqin was a great brother. He cared a lot about you. Don’t tire yourself too much. If he were still here, he would definitely worry about you…” Zhao Yuan’s voice trailed off.
“Zhao Yuan,” Bian Liming impatiently took over the conversation, lowering his voice, “Do you not know why I’m so tired these days? Because I’m bombarded with the title ‘Bian Liqin’s brother’ a hundred times a day. I have to repeat my name to everyone! So, please, I’m begging you, the deceased is gone. Don’t emphasize it so many times, alright?”
Zhao Yuan was stunned by his words. His temples throbbed, and all the previously chaotic thoughts seemed to snap “click,” unable to connect, leaving him staring blankly at Bian Liming.
Bian Liming took a deep breath, his tone calming down a bit, and continued, “Yesterday, the vice president of the Southern Country Pianist Association contacted me, asking if I was interested in joining. He said that winning the ‘Huazhang Cup’ was more than enough qualification. If I’m willing to join the association, I’ll be the youngest pianist in the association, completely deserving of being called a ‘pianist’! What Bian Liqin could do, I might be able to do too.”
Zhao Yuan was almost speechless, his eyes shaking as he looked at Bian Liming. After a while, he asked in a hesitant tone, “So, in your eyes, Bian Liqin was just a benchmark? But… he was your brother!”
Bian Liming nodded clearly, his tone calm and cold, “Yes, he was, but he and I have always had a competitive relationship. You should understand that. Not all brothers have a friendly relationship. You are an only child, never needing to fight for anything. That’s why you can casually call him ‘Brother’ as if it’s taken for granted!”
“What are you saying?” Zhao Yuan’s eyes reddened, looking at Bian Liming with disbelief.
Perhaps due to the commotion caused by the two, many people in the Bian family living room began to turn their heads towards them. However, Bian Liming still stared straight at Zhao Yuan, maintaining a serious expression.
Not wanting to create a scene at Bian Liqin’s memorial service, and not wanting to embarrass anyone present, Zhao Yuan avoided Bian Liming’s gaze, lowered his head, and said softly, “I’ll consider you calm when you’ve calmed down. I’ll come back later.” Without waiting for Bian Liming’s response, he turned and walked out of the room.
