Gao Ze was three years older than Liu Hao. If Liu Hao was the beloved king of the children in the orphanage, then Gao Ze was the detested disciplinarian. They ate from the same communal pot, slept in the same dormitory, studied, and attended school together, but Gao Ze was always the one with a stern face, the one most obsessed with rules and discipline, a stubborn little stickler.
Ironically, the most sensible one fell for the most rebellious. Even Gao Ze couldn’t figure it out himself. He always ended up cleaning up Bai Xiao’s messes, and he did so willingly.
That day, just like any other, the sharp, angry voice of the neighbor auntie rang out from the orphanage’s entrance again: “Gonna die, I swear! Director! That Xiaobai again! She stole my little dog and gave it a haircut, cut it all crooked! East side this, west side that, can’t even look at it anymore!”
The director quickly stepped forward to soothe her, “Auntie, auntie, I’ll handle it!”
“It wasn’t Xiaobai! It was me!” Gao Ze immediately stood up, as straight as his heroic air force officer father once did.
Seeing that it was the son of a martyr, the auntie pursed her lips and muttered, “Everyone spoils you, boy, so much so that one day, when your wife runs off with someone else, then you’ll feel the pain!” With that, she patted her behind and left.
The director, holding a thin bamboo cane, waved it in frustration. “Gao Ze! How long can you keep covering for her? She’s not only been stealing, but every neighbor around here has had their fruit trees or windows vandalized by her!”
Gao Ze lowered his head, his eyes flickering, but a strange smile tugged at his lips. “It’s my fault for not keeping an eye on Xiaobai, Director. Punish me instead.”
“Hey, hey! It’s not Ze Ge’s fault!” Bai Xiao ran back, out of breath, her bangs soaked with sweat on this hot summer day. “I just wanted to play with Little Black! I’m going to be a hairstylist in the future, and it’s so hot, I was just trying to help the dog cool down!”
At this moment, Liu Hao, still a short little kid, came over with dog hair all over his hands, basically giving away the truth without even needing to say anything. The director sighed, “You three… you’re the Iron Triangle! Always covering for each other!”
Bai Xiao, with a carefree expression, replied, “Mangoes and starfruit are meant to be eaten! If no one picks them, they’ll just rot on the tree. As for the windows… I didn’t do it on purpose! It’s dodgeball! How could I just stand there and let the ball hit me? It’s not like the ball has eyes; I can’t control where it flies. If you want to punish someone, punish Liu Hao. He threw the ball, and besides… his family has enough money to pay for it!”
The director couldn’t help but laugh out of frustration. “Doing wrong and acting so justified! Bai Xiao, you’re getting more and more out of control. Gao Ze and Liu Hao spoil you too much, and now you’re just running wild!” The director swung the thin bamboo cane toward Bai Xiao, but before it could land on her, Gao Ze’s bronzed arm took the hit, leaving a red mark.
“Ah! Director, you actually hit him!” Bai Xiao complained, heart aching.
“Isn’t it because of you, you wild girl!”
Liu Hao, standing foolishly to the side, smiled dumbly, lost in thought. The next day, he pulled a bunch of knockoff Barbies out of his backpack, ones he had bought from the night market. These toys were rare in the orphanage. But Liu Hao only gave them to Bai Xiao. “Here, for you to practice!” Liu Hao beamed, all shy and bright, practically screaming for praise.
Bai Xiao glanced at the dolls with disdain, feeling uninterested. “Boring! You have everything you want, so what’s so special about these dolls?”
Liu Hao frowned, still in third grade and unable to understand the anxiety that Bai Xiao, who was about to enter middle school, was feeling.
Gao Ze walked over and patted her on the back. “Don’t worry! After I graduate from high school, I’ll find a way to give you a home. We’ll leave this place together…”
“Hey, hey! What about me?” Liu Hao chimed in. “You guys want a home? That’s easy! I can ask my grandpa and grandma to adopt you both.”
Bai Xiao looked at Liu Hao like he was an idiot. “You think it’s as easy as buying groceries? It’s not that simple.”
Before Liu Hao could say more, Gao Ze interrupted, “Xiaobai, be careful lately. The new counsellor has been looking at you in a weird way.”
Bai Xiao nodded and irritably ran her hands through her hair. “I really want to get out of this place. It’s like being in prison every day. So boring I could die!”
At that moment, Yafan, who had been shooting hoops in the yard, overheard Bai Xiao’s complaint and jogged over with a water bottle. “Starlight isn’t even that bad! The place I was at before was way worse. We had to eat vegetarian food and chant scriptures every day, and the counsellors looked at us like we were garbage. Most of the time, they just ignored us completely. Our moms were all runaway workers, so it’s like our very birth was a sin. If I had a choice, I wouldn’t have wanted to be born at all!”
Yafan took a swig from his water bottle. “At least here at Starlight, we have food and drink. That’s already pretty good. You don’t know… there were even HIV-positive babies at the place I was at. No one would ever visit the orphanage. And those HIV-positive kids were bullied by other stateless children with mental and physical disabilities, and the counsellors didn’t care at all.”
Hearing this, Bai Xiao let out another sigh. “If we’re really comparing tragedies, I guess there’s no end to it.”
