After getting off work on Friday, Zuo Chi returned home and lay on the sofa in the screening room, watching a movie. Feeling drowsy, he rested his head on a cushion and dozed off. Suddenly, he heard the doorbell ring.
Rubbing his eyes, he slipped on his slippers and walked to the entrance. Peering through the peephole, he hesitated for a moment before deciding to open the door.
The peephole only revealed the silhouette of the person, making it difficult to discern the details. As Zuo Chi opened the door, he was startled. Sheng Li stood outside, looking vastly different from the last time they met. He exuded an aura of hostility, his eyes bloodshot, staring at him intently, like a coiled predator ready to strike.
Zuo Chi subconsciously wanted to close the door, but as he moved, his wrist was caught by Sheng Li, who gripped it tightly, causing him some pain.
“What are you doing here so late?”
Sheng Li’s tone was grim. “Are you engaged to Qin Xu? Why didn’t you tell me?”
Zuo Chi was puzzled. “Where did you hear that from?”
Sheng Li, wearing short sleeves, veins bulging on his arm muscles, snapped, “It doesn’t matter where I heard it from! Is it true?”
“Yes, it’s true.” Zuo Chi placed his other hand against the wall, trying to block Sheng Li from entering further. “It’s already a done deal. What’s the point of telling you?”
“Why did you get engaged to him? You don’t even know him! Do you know what kind of person he is?” Sheng Li’s anger boiled. “Is it because you and the Qin family negotiated and decided to ditch me!”
Zuo Chi stood there, dumbfounded. Ditch him? Sheng Li was twisting the truth. Even if Zuo Yi had long considered an alliance with Qin Yanren, he himself had no idea about it.
He said in a hoarse voice, “Are you questioning me? You’ve known for a long time. I’m just that kind of person. Sacrificing myself for the sake of benefit. What’s strange about marrying into the Qin family? I don’t need to know him; as long as he’s from the Qin family, it’s fine.”
Sheng Li clenched his fists, his chest heaving dramatically, seemingly unable to believe what Zuo Chi said. “You said… you wanted to be with me? Were you lying to me?”
“I didn’t lie to you.” Zuo Chi smiled bitterly, denying it was the coward’s way out. He might not have fully come out, but at least he dared to face it. “I wanted to be with you, but you didn’t want to. Wasn’t it your wish to cancel the engagement?”
Was it his wish? Sheng Li wasn’t sure anymore. All he knew was he wouldn’t allow Zuo Chi to get engaged to Qin Xu.
He couldn’t imagine Zuo Chi living under the same roof with another Alpha. He knew what engagement meant; it meant Zuo Chi would sleep in the same bed with another Alpha, maybe even spend heats with another Alpha, maybe… even get marked by another Alpha, carrying someone else’s pheromones.
“Your engagement hasn’t been announced yet. You still have a chance to back out. I’ll go with you to talk to your father, okay? Tell him not to marry you into the Qin family?” Sheng Li’s eyes were dark, harboring emotions Zuo Chi couldn’t decipher. He freed his wrist from Sheng Li’s grasp. “Sheng Li, don’t be so childish. This is my life, right or wrong, I’ll bear the consequences of my actions. As a friend, you don’t have the right to interfere with my choices.”
“This isn’t your choice! It’s Zuo Yi’s choice!” Sheng Li’s voice was sharp.
“You should know, sooner or later, I’ll marry an Alpha, whether it’s you or someone else. After getting to know Qin Xu, I think he’s not bad. You don’t need to worry about me.” Zuo Chi calmly said.
Sheng Li’s anger flared even more, his expression somewhat ferocious. “So you were on a date last Sunday?”
Zuo Chi remained silent.
“What did you do that day? Apart from going to the taekwondo gym and the restaurant, where else did you go? Did you hold hands?” Sheng Li gritted his teeth. “Did he touch you?!”
“Could you speak with a bit more respect?” Zuo Chi frowned. “And aren’t you being too nosy?”
Zuo Chi actually said he was being too nosy? Was he trying to cut ties so cleanly? Sheng Li felt his teeth souring; he stepped forward, trying to squeeze through the door.
“What are you doing?” Zuo Chi grabbed his arm.
“I’m checking if you’re hiding Qin Xu in there!”
“…Have you been drinking? Go home and sleep.”
“I’ll sleep here if I want to!” Sheng Li refused to leave.
“I don’t have extra beds here.”
Sheng Li remembered clearly, “The sofa in the theater room can be turned into a bed.”
“It’s not appropriate.”
“Why isn’t it appropriate?! Did Qin Xu drug you? You’ve only met him a few times!”
“It’s not about Qin Xu. I’m already engaged; I shouldn’t let other Alphas stay overnight at home.” Zuo Chi said softly, “Go home.”
Other Alphas… was he referring to him? Sheng Li felt his heart bleeding; when did he become another Alpha in Zuo Chi’s heart?
Did Zuo Chi consider his relationship with Qin Xu closer than theirs?
How long had it been since they broke off the engagement? How could Zuo Chi change so quickly!
No… perhaps when Zuo Chi went on vacation, he had already decided to leave him behind. He knew nothing, foolishly waiting for Zuo Chi to return.
He thought canceling the engagement was a fresh start, but what he got was news of Zuo Chi’s engagement with someone else.
Why was Zuo Chi treating him like this?
“We’ve known each other for over twenty years. We understand each other the best! We’ve bathed together, changed clothes together! We even… we’ve even slept together! What’s wrong with me staying overnight? Speaking of which, Qin Xu is the other Alpha here!”
Hearing Sheng Li speak so easily about them sleeping together, Zuo Chi felt a pang of bitterness in his heart; he turned away. “Sheng Li, if you want to continue being friends, it’s better to keep some things to yourself.”
Did Zuo Chi want to erase their past together?
“What do you mean by that!”
Sheng Li’s pheromones kept releasing, making Zuo Chi’s legs weak. He tried to keep himself rational, not influenced by the Alpha pheromones. “I should be asking you that. What are you here to quarrel with me for?”
“I don’t want you to marry Qin Xu!” Sheng Li became more anxious.
Zuo Chi was getting tired. “Not everything in the world will go your way. You don’t want to marry me, but you don’t want me to marry someone else. Don’t you think you’re being domineering?”
“I don’t not want to marry you, I… I…” Sheng Li’s mind was in chaos, completely forgetting he had come to apologize to Zuo Chi.
Zuo Chi blinked, wondering if he misheard. Sheng Li had been unhappy about their engagement from start to finish, but now he said he didn’t not want to?
If there was no unwillingness, what did Sheng Li’s sarcasm and indifference towards him mean?
If there was no unwillingness, why would he be entangled with other Omegas?
If there was no unwillingness, was he supposed to endure this pain and grievance?
“You’re drunk,” Zuo Chi suddenly exerted force to close the door, but Sheng Li’s hand reached in to stop him.
The two were at a standoff. Zuo Chi glanced at him through the crack of the door. “It’s late, if you keep making a fuss, the neighbors will complain. I have to work overtime tomorrow. Are you deliberately preventing me from resting?”
“I’m not.” Sheng Li defended himself. What he wanted was to have a good talk with Zuo Chi, to persuade him to cancel the engagement with Qin Xu. He knew it wouldn’t be easy, but he would stand by Zuo Chi’s side. If there were any difficulties, he would face them for him.
Why was Zuo Chi so unwilling?
“You’re just delaying my sleep now.” Zuo Chi’s voice carried weariness. “If you keep this up, I’ll have to call the police.”
Sheng Li stared at him blankly, his eyes, red and swollen, seemed to be pleading with him, asking why he was being so cruel.
Ignoring him, Zuo Chi pushed his hand away when he wasn’t paying attention and slammed the door shut with a loud “bang.”
Sheng Li stood outside the door, neither ringing the bell nor knocking. He thought he might really be drunk. Why would Zuo Chi treat him like this?
He waited outside the door for two hours. The late summer breeze blew in through the corridor window, feeling a bit chilly.
He tried to figure out some things, like how did he and Zuo Chi end up in this situation? And how could he stop Zuo Chi from getting engaged to Qin Xu?
Zuo Chi was disappointed in him, no longer waiting for him.
Sheng Li’s eyes and nose were red. He lit a cigarette, but the smoke choked him into coughing.
He had been in many relationships, all short-lived. Some ended because the omegas initiated the breakups, some because he did. But never had he felt so miserable before.
He had always followed the rules of parting on good terms, thinking that the most important thing in a relationship was happiness, without worrying about anything else. But now, he found himself unable to let go.
Was this love?
He laughed at himself, feeling foolish. How could he not realize how urgently he wanted to keep Zuo Chi by his side? He hated seeing Zuo Chi with others, he liked it when Zuo Chi’s eyes were on him, he would feel happy and proud when others praised Zuo Chi, secretly pleased that Zuo Chi was closest to him and couldn’t be taken away by anyone else.
How could he not realize? When Zuo Chi went abroad, he kept thinking about what he was doing, his whole heart went with him abroad. Without Zuo Chi by his side, he became abnormal.
How could he not realize? His gaze hadn’t lingered on anyone else for a long time. Every time he did it with others, he closed his eyes and thought of Zuo Chi.
Zuo Chi, Zuo Chi, Zuo Chi… It was all about Zuo Chi. If this wasn’t love, then what was? His heart was aching so much that he was on the verge of tears, finally seeing his own feelings clearly.
Sheng Li looked at the tightly closed door, allowing the cigarette butt to burn his fingers until the last flicker of light extinguished.
He always worried that lovers couldn’t stay together forever, but in fact, even friendship might not last forever. Whether they could be together for one year, ten years, twenty years, or fifty years didn’t depend on the category of their feelings, but on whether that person was the right one.
Zuo Chi gave him friendship, and he could also give him love. They had been friends for over twenty years, yes, but they could also switch roles and become lifelong partners.
If it was Zuo Chi… Sheng Li thought, he could imagine how eternity could be.
He couldn’t let Zuo Chi go.
