DPT chapter 51

Zuo Chi said, “Yam and lotus seed porridge, or just plain rice porridge is fine. Thank you.”

Qin Xu turned to Sheng Li. “What about you?”

When Sheng Li saw Qin Xu at Zuo Chi’s doorstep, his predominant emotion was anger; he was filled with rage and wanted to vent, but now that he had calmed down, he felt only sadness and embarrassment.

He thought about the past six months of living together, where he had only cooked tomato and egg noodles for Zuo Chi once. Even during Zuo Chi’s heat, he hadn’t taken care of him properly.

He then put himself in Qin Xu’s shoes; If he were Qin Xu, he would never have let someone like himself enter this door, let alone stay for dinner. Qin Xu’s generosity made him feel especially immature.

What should he do? Should he forcefully take Zuo Chi away from here? Or shamelessly linger at his rival’s house? He had no right to interfere or stop them.

While repairing the computer, Assistant Liu had called twice, asking about the meeting and when it would be rescheduled. Sheng Li looked at Zuo Chi, and with difficulty, said, “I won’t stay for dinner.”

Qin Xu was somewhat surprised; he thought with Sheng Li’s previous determination to come to his house and see Zuo Chi, he wouldn’t give up easily.

There was no change in Zuo Chi’s expression, just a light sigh when he heard the door close with a ‘bang.’

Two minutes later, he received a message from Sheng Li: If Qin Xu does anything inappropriate, call me.

Zuo Chi typed in the conversation box: He’s not you. Don’t assume everyone is like you.

Fingers rested on the edge of the phone, but he didn’t send the message. He deleted all the content and didn’t reply.

On the third day at Qin Xu’s place, Zuo Chi didn’t feel any physical discomfort and left early.

Qin Xu repeatedly checked his condition, took his temperature, and only let him go after confirming it was normal.

Zuo Chi felt he had caused trouble for Qin Xu, so after returning home, he selected a set of delicate tableware online, intending to give it to him as a thank-you gift.

He worked online all day, busy and restless in bed at night. Turning on all the lights at home, he went to the living room for water and saw the incense burner that Sheng Li had given him.

Some say that smelling incense aids sleep, so since he had accepted it, he decided to give it a try.

Initially, he couldn’t discern the scent, but gradually, it took on the aroma of resin and coffee.

It smelled nice.

The scent of coffee was somewhat like Qin Xu’s pheromones, but it wasn’t actually pheromones, so it didn’t elicit any physical response from Zuo Chi.

He didn’t know the extent of his compatibility with Qin Xu’s pheromones, but it seemed high. This was the first time he directly felt the influence of pheromones.

Some scholars believe that pheromones are a natural result of human development, with a selective function to display the potential compatibility between two individuals, saving time in seeking partners. However, this view had been strongly challenged, considered unscientific and disrespectful to the three ABO genders.

Zuo Chi didn’t agree either. He just found Qin Xu’s pheromones pleasant, causing his heart to race, feeling warm, and unable to resist getting closer, but he could separate Qin Xu’s pheromones from Qin Xu rationally.

Zuo Chi thought Sheng Li probably didn’t know Qin Xu’s pheromones smelled like coffee when he gifted this incense. Or perhaps, he just randomly gave it without paying attention to the scent.

Gradually feeling drowsy amidst the coffee scent, he caught a familiar smell with his nose.

It was the scent of amber he had smelled for over a decade.

The middle note was resin and coffee, and the base note was amber. The drowsiness Zuo Chi had finally managed to cultivate vanished.

He used to love the scent of amber, but now this scent, so similar to Sheng Li’s pheromones, couldn’t bring him peace.

The next day, he couldn’t stop feeling drowsy in front of the computer, even two cups of black coffee didn’t help. As usual, he checked his email and saw an invitation from his alma mater, inviting him to speak as an outstanding graduate at the anniversary celebration.

Zuo Chi was busy with company matters and couldn’t afford to spare time, so he politely declined.

In the afternoon, he received a call from his high school homeroom teacher, asking how he had been lately and expressing a desire for him to visit the school: “Our school has produced many talents, some of whom may be low-key on weekdays. You can communicate with them during the event.”

On one hand, Zuo Chi couldn’t refuse the teacher’s kindness, and on the other hand, he felt that now that his company was established, he needed to get to know more people who could help him expand his business. After some thought, he decided to attend the anniversary celebration.

Two days before the anniversary celebration, Xiang Yiqun learned from Zhou Jing that Zuo Chi would attend the celebration and was preparing to call Sheng Li to inform him.

Zhou Jing casually mentioned it, but unexpectedly, Xiang Yiqun wanted to call Sheng Li: “What are you going to tell Sheng Li? Do you want to give him another chance? He didn’t appreciate Zuo Chi before, why bother now?”

Xiang Yiqun knew that Zhou Jing had some grievances about Sheng Li’s previous behavior, so he was conflicted: “With so many people at the anniversary celebration, if Sheng Li goes, it’s just a meeting. It’s too hard for me not to tell him. You understand these things, right? When it comes to friends, it’s hard to be impartial.”

Zhou Jing hummed, “It’s up to you.”

In the end, the call was made, and Xiang Yiqun didn’t beat around the bush: “Zuo Chi is going to speak at the anniversary celebration as an outstanding graduate. Are you sure you’re not coming this time?”

Sheng Li: “Really?”

Xiang Yiqun: “Why would I lie to you? My omega said so and you know his father is the headmaster of our school!”

But Sheng Li didn’t immediately change his mind as Xiang Yiqun thought: “I have a business trip the day before, so I may not be able to make it.”

“Another business trip?” Xiang Yiqun said, “”Alright then. You take care of yourself. We haven’t seen each other for a long time, and it’s just right to get together.”

Hearing that Zuo Chi would attend the anniversary celebration, Sheng Li’s first reaction was to arrange for someone else to go on the business trip for him so he could go to the school. But his excitement didn’t last for even two seconds before he realized maybe Zuo Chi wouldn’t want to see him at school.

After leaving Qin Xu’s place, he had thought a lot. For a long time, he had immersed himself in his own world, letting his emotions completely control his words and actions, only knowing anger, sadness, and fear, only eager for Zuo Chi’s response to his feelings, but ignoring reality.

When Qin Xu asked Zuo Chi what kind of porridge he wanted to eat, he suddenly felt ashamed.

In an instant, he vaguely realized that he couldn’t make porridge, he wasn’t good at taking care of people, and he didn’t know how to love someone.

What did he have, what could he do, what could he give to Zuo Chi?

He couldn’t think of anything. He recognized that he liked Zuo Chi, but… why should Zuo Chi choose him?

Just because they had known each other for over twenty years? Or because Zuo Chi used to like him?

He couldn’t be without Zuo Chi, but why should Zuo Chi be responsible for his feelings, which were far behind? Why should Zuo Chi give him time to change, why…

Zuo Chi didn’t reply to his messages, and Sheng Li thought thankfully Qin Xu was a decent person and didn’t take advantage of him. He also wondered if Qin Xu treated Zuo Chi well, would Zuo Chi… would Zuo Chi fall in love with him.

The more Sheng Li thought about it, the more painful it felt. He had always known that he was considered a failure among his peers. He had no clear goals or ambitions. But in reality, he wasn’t as indifferent as he appeared; he still cared about what others thought of him, especially… what Zuo Chi thought. That’s why, after Zuo Chi pointed out his incompetence, he said those hurtful words.

Clearly incompetent himself, yet resorting to insulting others to salvage his own self-esteem.

Sheng Li hadn’t seriously considered these things before, perhaps subconsciously, but didn’t dare to confront them. His life wasn’t carefree and easygoing, but reckless and confused.

Back in school, because of his prowess in fighting, others called him “Sheng ge,” and he was a prominent figure on the playground, attracting many gazes with just his face. But now in his twenties, his fists couldn’t protect the ones he cared for, and others respected him because of his surname “Sheng,” not because of his face, and certainly not because of his abilities.

Admitting one’s own failure is hard enough, let alone admitting that he wasn’t the best choice for Zuo Chi.

Sheng Li could only find relief from the inner restlessness and anxiety by working tirelessly day and night. Once he stopped, a fear would grip his throat and clutch at his heart, making it impossible to sleep.

He dared not imagine Zuo Chi being with Qin Xu. Just the thought made him feel like he was losing his mind. He entertained some dark thoughts, wanting Zuo Chi to only look at him, but he repeatedly reminded himself not to make any more mistakes. Even if Qin Xu wasn’t between them, Zuo Chi wouldn’t spare him another glance.

He wanted more than just Zuo Chi treating him well and smiling at him like before; he wanted Zuo Chi to be happy too.

Sheng Li didn’t go to Zuo Chi’s company anymore, nor did he visit his house. He feared that Zuo Chi would find him annoying and dislike him. But he truly missed him; every minute of not working was spent thinking of him.

Just catching a glimpse of him from afar would be enough.

So, when he went on a business trip to City C, he exerted effort to compress two days’ worth of work into one, slept for only four hours, caught the early morning flight back to City S, changed into a new set of clothes at home, shaved off his chin stubble, and hastily rushed to the school.

It was rare for the school to hold an open event like this, and Sheng Li followed the crowd towards the direction of the flag-raising platform.

He messaged Xiang Yiqun: “I’m here.”

Xiang Yiqun called him, lowering his voice, “Where are you?”

Sheng Li: “I’m standing outside.”

Xiang Yiqun leaned over and reached out: “Oh, I see you, come over, I’ve saved you a seat.”

Sheng Li walked over, “Has the ceremony started already?”

Tai Xingyu was sitting next to Xiang Yiqun, “Just started. After the leaders finish their speeches, it’s time for the outstanding graduates to speak.”

Xiang Yiqun said, “Don’t worry, Zuo Chi hasn’t started speaking yet.”

The leaders spoke for quite some time, about ten minutes before it ended. The host announced the invitation of the outstanding graduate Zuo Chi to the stage, and Sheng Li heard his heartbeat accelerating.

Zuo Chi stood on the stage in a fitted suit, exuding charm in every gesture.

Sheng Li sat below the stage, watching him.

Like before, but not quite the same as before.

 

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Author’s note:

There’s no excuse for Sheng Li’s actions. In the previous chapter, he thought the person entering Zuo Chi’s home was a thief before he reacted.

Xu Hui didn’t attend the school celebration. He actually had a lot of free time, but he felt he was too famous and his presence might cause disturbance, disrupting the normal conduct of the celebration.

Tai Xingyu and Xiang Yiqun thought he was overthinking it.

 

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  Author’s note:
  
  There’s no excuse for Sheng Li’s actions. In the previous chapter, he thought the person entering Zuo Chi’s home was a thief before he reacted.
  
  Xu Hui didn’t attend the school celebration. He actually had a lot of free time, but he felt he was too famous and his presence might cause disturbance, disrupting the normal conduct of the celebration.
  
  Tai Xingyu and Xiang Yiqun thought he was overthinking it.