II “Boyfriend, give me a kiss?”
After Xia Zhiye prepared the bouquet and went backstage to find Song Yan, he was told that Song Yan’s father had come to pick him up. At that moment, a fear of losing something he treasured the most surged through every nerve and blood vessel in Xia Zhiye’s body.
He sprinted directly towards the school gate.
He felt like he had never run so fast before.
He was afraid that if he was even a second late, Song Yan would leave.
Until he saw Song Yan’s figure, he kept rushing forward. Then, he embraced him, felt his warmth, heard his voice—oxygen, previously suppressed by anxiety, rushed back into his body. His brain could finally think and breathe.
This clarity in thinking and breathing lasted less than two seconds. The oxygen in his blood was instantly depleted again because of a sentence from Song Yan.
Song Yan looked at him and asked, “But Xia Zhiye, I only have this not-so-good scarf left. Are you still willing to be with me?”
“Xia Zhiye, are you willing to be with me?”
Precisely extracting these words, Xia Zhiye, who had always been smarter than anyone and effortlessly adept, surprisingly stood there like a fool, staring at Song Yan for a long time without saying a word.
It was as if the crash from immense joy after the great sorrow had again clouded his mind, making him momentarily less intelligent.
It was the first time Song Yan had seen Xia Zhiye in such a foolish state. However, precisely this foolish gaze that remained fixed on him, was the one that expressed the most sincere and unreserved emotions. It made his ears hot, flushed red. Between the two youths, not a word was spoken.
Song Yan was not good at expressing emotions. In a moment of emotional outburst, he couldn’t control himself, revealing his true feelings. The reaction of the cunning fox on the opposite side changed instantly to that of a pure innocent rabbit, making him feel like he was being overly sentimental.
Embarrassed by Xia Zhiye’s intense gaze, Song Yan, who had just wanted to ask another question, was stopped once he heard Ruan Tian’s voice shouting: “Song Yan, what are you doing? The award ceremony is about to start!”
So, with a red face, he stuffed the two scarves into Xia Zhiye’s hands and said in an unfriendly tone, “If you’re not willing, forget it.”
After saying that, he walked briskly towards Ruan Tian with his hands in his pockets.
Xia Zhiye finally came to his senses, hugged the bouquet and scarves, and quickly trailed after him, saying, “I’m not unwilling. It’s not what you think, Song Yan, wait for me…”
However, Song Yan only quickened his pace, disappearing into the crowd like a mouse hiding from a cat. He didn’t give Xia Zhiye a chance to speak again.
But unable to resist, Xia Zhiye sneaked a glance outside the crowd. When caught by Xia Zhiye, Song Yan quickly lowered his eyelashes, pretending that nothing had happened.
Even Ruan Tian couldn’t stand it anymore. “Song Yan, what’s wrong with your ears?”
“Nothing, probably from the cold.”
Song Yan replied calmly, diverting the topic to discuss the program with Jiang Yuanyuan. He seemed very calm and unaffected.
Just because his skin was unusually white, even a slight twinge of rosiness could be seen from afar, representing teenage shyness and the burgeoning of affection. This red of bashfulness had followed his earlobe and disappeared into the collar of his coat.
‘He’s a little coward, ah. After confessing, he ran away.’ Xia Zhiye mused.
If Xia Zhiye hadn’t just been overwhelmed by joy, he would have cornered him in a corner and kissed him passionately, as written in those romance novel synopsis.
Thinking of how Song Yan’s usually cool face turned red when he was kissed, and looking at the person in the crowd who looked well-dressed but couldn’t be touched, Xia Zhiye slightly ground his teeth.
He hated that a certain someone ran away after flirting with him. He hated that he wasn’t quick-witted enough at that time.
Clearly, he had imagined countless times how he would react when Song Yan agreed to be his boyfriend. However, when it actually happened, he behaved like a dumb novice.
—Probably because he liked Song Yan too much.
So, so much, too much. So fond of him, cherishing him until his heart overflowed. And precisely because of that, he became clumsy.
But it didn’t matter; he vowed to be cleverer in the future.
Xia Zhiye looked at Song Yan, chuckled lightly, and then said to Ruan Tian, “Laoshi, it’s okay, my stomach doesn’t hurt anymore. I can join you guys.”
Song Yan, hearing the gnashing of teeth in his words, avoided eye contact, pursed his lips.
Then Xia Zhiye, while jokingly, put on the ugly-cute red scarf seriously.
With clear evidence in full sight, he wanted to see just how long a certain someone can hold out.
–
Thanks to the outstanding appearance of this scarf, the second the group sat down in the hot pot restaurant, Chen Rui couldn’t help but ask, “Lord Xia, what’s going on? Has your aesthetic taste degenerated? This scarf looks so ugly.”
After he finished his question, Song Yan’s chopsticks in his hand snapped.
Xia Zhiye also raised his eyelids lazily and glanced at him , “Ugly?”
“…” Sensing a murderous aura, Chen Rui and Jiang Yuanyuan quickly exchanged wordless glances, and Chen Rui immediately changed his words, “Not ugly, nice, very nice, absolutely perfect match with your handsome features, Lord Xia.”
Xia Zhiye nodded in satisfaction.
On the other side, Zhao Ruiwen, who had a 800-degree myopia and 200-degree astigmatism, pushed his glasses and squinted, “I think it looks quite good. Was it a gift from someone?”
Xia Zhiye leisurely adjusted the scarf and spoke with an air of pride, “Mhm, a gift from my significant other1the term he used is “对象”, which is gender-neutral.”
As his words fell, “Snap,” another chopsticks in Song Yan’s hand broke.
Everyone looked over at him, “Yan-ge, is there something wrong?”
Xia Zhiye also enjoyed watching the fun, “Aiyah, is Yan-ge so excited to hear that I have a partner now?”
“…” Song Yan cursed Xia Zhiye a hundred times in his heart for being shameless, then gritted his teeth, pretending to be calm. “Nothing, just don’t know when you got a partner.”
Hearing this, Chen Rui, Jiang Yuanyuan, and Zhao Ruiwen, who were unclear about the situation, suddenly realized and looked at Xia Zhiye together, “Yeah, when did you get one?”
Xia Zhiye, responding appropriately, laughed in a carefree manner, “Just tonight.”
“?”
“??”
“???”
Three confused faces stood side-by-side.
“When did you get a significant other tonight? Could it be… it’s Jiang Yuanyuan?!” Chen Rui exclaimed excitedly.
Jiang Yuanyuan, who was wrongly accused, frantically waved her hands. “It’s not me, I’m innocent.”
“Who else could it be?”
Chen Rui, the straightforward guy, was puzzled.
Xia Zhiye lazily smiled, “It’s you guys… uh—”
Before Xia Zhiye could finish, he was harshly stepped on.
The instigator was calmly sipping tea.
The others found this to be strange, “Lord Xia, what were you shouting?”
Enduring the pain, Xia Zhiye calmly said, “Nothing, just wanted to say… I’m online dating.”
“Oh…”
So that’s it.
Everyone suddenly realized, no wonder they didn’t see them today.
“But Lord Xia, let me give you a piece of advice as your good brother: be cautious in online dating. Don’t get deceived by those girls with sweet loli voices and cute profile pictures. Nowadays, voice changers are so advanced, and those nice girls you imagine might turn out to be packing something bigger2yes, he means his dick than yours.”
As soon as Chen Rui finished speaking, the others, including Song Yan and Zhou Ziqiu, collectively choked on their water.
Coughs filled the air, echoing in the room.
Chen Rui innocently and blankly asked, “Did I say something wrong?”
He sounded innocent and confused.
Zhou Ziqiu, the first to recover, wiped his mouth, pretending to be calm, “Generally speaking, that shouldn’t happen.”
Xia Zhiye also recovered, patting Song Yan’s back, trying not to laugh, “Yeah, I think so too.”
Song Yan, who was already recovering, choked again after hearing Xia Zhiye’s words. He gave Xia Zhiye a fierce kick.
“Why did you kick me?” Xia Zhiye pretended to be innocent.
Song Yan: “…”
Yeah, why did he kick Xia Zhiye?
Certainly, he couldn’t say that his “package” was bigger than Xia Zhiye’s – he had nothing to reference.
Moreover, Xia Zhiye didn’t know that the [Rich and Beautiful Young Lady] was actually him. Thinking of this, Song Yan slapped Xia Zhiye’s cup off, picked up the tea cup, and continued to drink, trying to dilute the shame in his heart.
Xia Zhiye was just babbling nonsense, so he could pretend not to know anything.
However, the tree might be still but the wind was still blowing3trouble is still brewing despite Song Yan thinking otherwise.. As soon as he took two sips, Chen Rui saw something he shouldn’t have seen with sharp eyes, “Hey, why does the blue scarf on the back of Song Yan’s chair look so similar to Lord Xia’s? They both have this pattern, with matching print. Both are a bit ugly, too.”
Song Yan froze while holding his water glass.
Xia Zhiye looked at him with his head propped up and a smile. “Ah yes, Yan-ge, what’s going on? How come your scarf looks exactly like mine? Did you secretly buy a matching one with mine?”
If Song Yan had internal strength, the old stainless steel teacup in his hand would have been crushed to pieces by him at this moment.
Little Fatty on the side, who knew everything all-too-well, looked longingly at the sky and let out a long sigh. ‘Why on earth did I want to see those two spread dog food all over? And why am I alone to shoulder this burden?’
The most confused person in the audience, Chen Rui, asked with a curious look, “Why did you sigh just now?”
“Nothing…” Little Fatty answered with a tone of helplessness, “I’m just thinking about what birthday gift to give Lord Xia. His birthday is in two hours.”
“Oh, right! Tomorrow is Christmas Eve, and it’s Xia Zhiye’s birthday! Damn, I forgot to prepare a gift!” Chen Rui exclaimed, not realizing at all that his relationship with Xia Zhiye was actually not that good.
Zhou Ziqiu, who also delivered birthday gifts every year on time, calmly sipped his tea, “It’s okay, I didn’t prepare either. Moreover, look at our Yan-ge. Even with their good relationship, he didn’t prepare anything, right?”
“Really? Our Yan-ge didn’t prepare anything?” Xia Zhiye approached, holding his head, looking at Song Yan and smiling with malicious intent – he looked like in dire need to be beaten.
Song Yan, who had obviously prepared a gift, gritted his teeth.
Xia Zhiye was intentionally making trouble. If he said he prepared the gift, it would mean publicly admitting that he was Xia Zhiye’s boyfriend. If he said he didn’t prepare… Xia Zhiye had a big bouquet of lilies on the side for him. It made him look like an ungrateful person in comparison.
Seeing the narrow eye-smile in Xia Zhiye’s face, and thinking of his disgusting confession before, Song Yan became angry and stood up directly. “I’m going to buy it now.”
After saying that, he walked out the door, even forgetting to put on his coat.
It was warm and bright inside the restaurant, but outside was not. In the restaurant’s courtyard area, there was a deep bamboo forest, blanketed with a layer of snow.
Xia Zhiye hurriedly picked up the back of the chair, picked up Song Yan’s coat and scarf, and chased after him.
He grabbed Song Yan’s wrist and led him to a hidden corner behind the bamboo forest. After wrapping him in a coat, he looked at Song Yan’s tight lips and laughed softly. “What’s going on? Are you angry?”
Song Yan said in an angry tone, “Don’t you think my gift is ugly?”
“Who thinks your gift is ugly?”
Song Yan kept a straight face and said nothing.
In a serious tone, Xia Zhiye said, “Chen Rui is blind and has poor aesthetic sense. He will never be able to find a wife in his life.”
Song Yan still had a straight face.
Xia Zhiye decided to change his approach. “But… is our Yan-ge really planning to give me such a scarf for my birthday?”
Song Yan just wanted to refute, but swallowed his words back.
Xia Zhiye sighed softly before continuing, “I like our Yan-ge very, very much. I didn’t even attend my award ceremony because of you. I flew all the way back to Beijing in advance in order to help you vent your grievances. I delivered takeaways to you and was chased and scolded by the security guards. It’s really not easy to get my birthday gift, which is this small scarf.”
Song Yan: “…”
“People say that what matters the most is the effort and meaning behind the gift. It doesn’t matter whether the gift is valuable or not, it’s all about the intention. So in your heart, am I just worth a piece of street goods bought in the spur of the moment? Yan-ge… so you value me this much?” Xia Zhiye looked downcasted, as if he was injured by Song Yan’s words.
Song Yan immediately became anxious. “That’s not what I meant.”
“Then what do you mean?” Xia Zhiye wanted to trick Song Yan into saying his confession again. “Does it mean that our Yan-ge has something else he wants to give me?”
“……”
Shameless!
Song Yan was not a fool. Of course he could see Xia Zhiye’s purpose. He gritted his teeth and was about to kick him hard, then walked away. However, before doing so, he remembered what Little Fatty once said: In the matter of the heart, a proper response is a must.
The reason why Xia Zhiye was so persistent in luring him to say those words again was probably because he had told Song Yan his liking many times, but he had never said it once in return.
That’s why he was so uneasy when he couldn’t find Xia Zhiye today.
That’s why he turned into a blank-faced fool after hearing his confession.
Thinking of Xia Zhiye running towards him despite the heavy snowfall and giving him the utmost care and warmth, Song Yan couldn’t help but kick him.
He just pulled the long dark blue scarf from Xia Zhiye’s hand with a cold face, then tied a crooked bow on his neck. He tilted his face up, showing off the bow. With a stern face, he said, “How about this? Are you satisfied with this gift?”
Xia Zhiye was stunned at first, and then realized that this was the method of packing himself that he taught Song Yan yesterday.
At that moment, all the love and joy finally broke through all restraints. He hugged Song Yan tightly, nuzzled him, and laughed softly, “I can’t believe there’s someone as lovely as you in this world.”
“You’re so fucking cute.”
Song Yan felt embarrassed to the core.
If it weren’t for the purpose of coaxing Xia Zhiye, he would never have done such a stupid thing in his life. In the end, this person praised him for being cute, which was simply insulting him.
Song Yan tried to break away from his hold angrily.
Something slipped from his coat pocket and fell to the ground as he moved.
Song Yan hurriedly wanted to pick it up, but Xia Zhiye did it before him.
The completely broken dial laid in the palm of his hand. It was not difficult to tell that it was a fragment of a brand new watch.
He caught a hint of somberness behind Song Yan’s gaze. Xia Zhiye could guess the reason. He whispered, “Did you buy this for me?”
Song Yan pursed his lips and did not answer.
Xia Zhiye asked again, “Was it broken by your father?”
Song Yan’s lips were still pursed tight, and no sound escaped from it. However, the corners of his eyes were already wet – his wounds were still fresh, after all.
Xia Zhiye’s voice tightened. “Did your father still deduct your pocket money? You only have enough money to buy me a small scarf?”
Instead of truthfully answering it, Song Yan turned his body away. “No, I just don’t value you that high, so I only give you cheap goods. However… I can only give you this now, so if you don’t want to be with me, I’ll…”
Before he finished speaking, Xia Zhiye hugged him again, and he sighed softly. “Song Yan, are you an idiot?”
Song Yan instinctively yelled back, “You’re the idiotic one!”
This time, Xia Zhiye didn’t give in to him. He found Song Yan’s outburst somewhat funny. “You’re not an idiot. But why don’t you know that… even if you have nothing and can’t give me anything, I will still like you?”
Xia Zhiye lowered his head and lightly wiped the corners of Song Yan’s eyes. “Song Yan, I like you just because I like you, not because of what you can give me.”
Song Yan lowered his eyelashes.
Xia Zhiye’s fingers gently swept the end of his eyes, taking away all the ache and dampness with his gentle warmth. “Song Yan, you don’t have to be afraid that you haven’t given enough, because your existence itself is enough to be liked by others. At the very least, I like it very much. Do you understand?”
“At the very least, I like it very much.”
Song Yan always felt that somewhere deep in his memory, Xia Zhiye seemed to have said such words to himself. That was the first time he got a shallow comfort dipped in the fragrance of osmanthus flowers in the midst of all the self-denial.
Although he had never believed that his existence itself was something worthy of being liked, at that moment he was willing to believe in Xia Zhiye.
Maybe he can indeed be liked, just by the virtue of being himself.
He really likes Xia Zhiye.
So he raised his head, looked at Xia Zhiye, and asked directly and calmly, “Then are you willing to be with me?”
Xia Zhiye chuckled softly in return. “I told you, my scarf was given to me by my significant other, so…”
Xia Zhiye hooked his fingers on the hem of the bow in front of Song Yan’s neck, lowered his head, and brought his lips close to Song Yan. His already-gentle voice lowered into a hushed whisper, and a cheeky smile bloomed on his face. “So… Boyfriend, can I get an extra after I open my birthday gift? For example, can you give me…”
“A kiss?”
On a winter night, a dark blue scarf slowly falls down the all-white bamboo forest path. Underneath the blanket of snow, laid rest buds, ready to awaken as the spring dawns.
