Chapter 22 – Haircut
Novel Title: 一屋暗灯 (Ephemeral Light)
Author：麦香鸡呢 (McChicken)
Translator: K (@kin0monogatari)
Protagonists: 宋谨 (Song Jin -MC), 宋星阑 (Song Xinglan -ML)
*Please read at Novels Space.space, the original site of translation. TQ*
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During this period, Song Jin had basically not paid much attention to Song Xinglan, except to supervise his medication and meals. The rest of the time, Song Jin stayed in his own room, coding, editing photos, and reading. He didn’t know what Song Xinglan was up to. And as long as he didn’t cause trouble, Song Jin ignored him completely.
For Song Xinglan, the most troublesome thing was probably doing laundry. Before this, his black hoodie was covered in wet mud from sleeping in the field. He stood in the yard washing it himself for a whole afternoon. And because he didn’t know how to wring clothes, the wet hoodie hung on the second floor for four whole days without drying.
Song Jin didn’t use a washing machine. He usually hand-washed his clothes. Every time he washed clothes, Song Xinglan would hold the washbasin and watch him wash. After Song Jin finished, Song Xinglan would stand in front of the sink to wash his own clothes.
Today’s tasks were not many. Song Jin finished them quickly at the computer. Grapefruit was sleeping nearby. Song Jin got up and went out to wash some fruits. He usually washed the fruits and left them in the kitchen. Song Xinglan would secretly come over and take some to eat. After he finished, Song Jin would replenish them.
As he passed by the small room, he noticed the door was ajar. Song Jin paused and gently pushed the door open.
Amidst the clutter, Song Xinglan sat on the small bed, his knees up, staring out the window with the curtain half-drawn. The autumn afternoon sun was warm and golden, casting a halo on his youthful profile. Fine dust particles floated in the air. Everything appeared tranquil yet lonely.
Song Jin thought of the attic he used to live in. When he was young, during holidays, his mother was hardly ever home because she had to work. Song Jin would sit on the bed, looking at the slanted skylight across from him, where sunlight would also shine in, with floating dust particles. He couldn’t remember what he used to think back then. Perhaps he didn’t think about anything at all, just sitting there in solitude, staring blankly. When the sun set, his mother would come home and make dinner for him.
Just like Song Xinglan now, with no one to talk to and nothing to do, he would slowly endure the long idle time alone. When it was time to eat, he would happily run out of the room to see Song Jin cooking. Meanwhile, Song Jin would always pay little attention to him.
Thinking of everything during this period, Song Xinglan was always proactive and eager to help with anything he could, even though he was always rejected and ignored by Song Jin. His enthusiasm seemed inexhaustible, always showing a cheerful smile when he saw Song Jin.
People from the Toronto company wanted to see Song Xinglan through video chat. But when faced with the camera, Song Xinglan looked bewildered, constantly asking who they were. The former employees from the domestic group on the other side of the video chat were full of sighs and tears.
He used to be a young core leader in the company. But now he could only sit in his cramped room every day, like a trapped little wolf. He could only stare out the window alone, waiting for dinner time to come so he could talk to his brother.
Song Jin blinked his eyes slowly. He didn’t sympathise with Song Xinglan. He just felt helpless.
If Song Xinglan hadn’t done those things to him, even if they had only interacted as strangers from childhood to adulthood, at this point, Song Jin would still do his best to take care of him and accompany him. Because after all, he was his own younger brother.
But Song Xinglan had truly ruined him, both physically and in terms of dignity, that was an undeniable fact. So, even if he was completely different now, Song Jin still found it difficult to convince himself to let go.
Song Jin really didn’t know what to do.
“Song Xinglan,” Song Jin called him.
Song Xinglan turned his head abruptly. He was first startled for a second, then instantly smiled, “Ge, why are you up so early?”
He got off the bed, put on his shoes, and walked to the door. He looked down at Song Jin, asking seriously, “Is there something wrong?”
Stepping back to create some distance, Song Jin avoided his direct gaze and said, “Do you want to go out for a walk?”
Song Xinglan thought he had misheard. So he asked, “Go out?”
“Just a casual walk,” Song Jin said lightly, “to pick some vegetables for tomorrow.”
“Let’s go, let’s go!” Song Xinglan nodded vigorously. His eyes were shining unbelievably, “I’ll go with Ge.”
The weather in the afternoon was still very nice. Song Jin took Song Xinglan to pick some vegetables. Later, Song Jin looked at Song Xinglan squatting on the ground and asked him, “Do you want to cut your hair?”
Song Xinglan’s hair had grown quite long, sometimes covering his eyes. It was troublesome to wash the head, especially to avoid the wound. He had only washed his hair once since he came here. Since the wound had not fully healed, Song Jin helped him wash it.
“Yes.” Song Xinglan nodded, “I wanna cut it.”
So Song Jin took him to the village barber shop.
The barber was eager to try: “Young man, what hairstyle do you want?”
Song Xinglan immediately looked at Song Jin and Song Jin said, “Just a buzz cut.”
“A buzz cut.” Song Xinglan repeated to the barber with Song Jin, as if it was not his own head. He didn’t care at all what hairstyle to get. Whatever Song Jin said was what he would do.
“He has a wound on his head.” Song Jin stood by the door and said, “Shushu, please be careful.”
“Alright, alright. Don’t worry.”
Song Xinglan was not obedient when getting his haircut. He kept peeking at Song Jin through the mirror, afraid that he would be left behind. The barber had countless times tried to straighten his head. But it was useless. Finally, the barber had no choice but to say, “Xiao Song, come here. Your brother can’t see you. Stand over here.”
Song Jin shifted his gaze from the distant mountain back to the barber shop, locking eyes with Song Xinglan in the mirror.
Song Xinglan gave him a bright smile through the mirror.
After the haircut, the barber praised Song Xinglan repeatedly, saying that he was the best-looking and most handsome head he had ever done. This made Song Xinglan quite pleased with himself even after leaving the shop. He told Song Jin, “Ge, the barber, he praised me. He said I look good, the best-looking.”
Song Jin: “Because the barber has only cut the hair of people in this village. There’s no need for you to be so proud.”
Song Xinglan: “But- but am I really not handsome?”
Song Jin: “Not handsome.”
***
After dinner, Song Jin took a shower. He had walked quite a bit today, and his left leg, which had been injured before, was feeling a bit sore. So, he brought out a foot spa tub, filled it with water, and placed it in front of the small sofa in his room. He was ready to soak his feet and relieve some fatigue.
Song Xinglan was about to take a shower too. Out of habit, he first looked for traces of Song Jin and happened to see him rolling up his pyjama legs.
He saw the scar on Song Jin’s left shin. He was stunned for a moment and then as if possessed, he walked into Song Jin’s room.
Song Xinglan had never set foot in Song Jin’s room before because Song Jin didn’t let him in. It was not explicitly forbidden. But Song Xinglan could sense Song Jin’s resistance to him entering his room, so he had never stepped in.
Song Jin was sitting on the sofa, looking a bit dazed at Song Xinglan. He suddenly came in without saying a word and Song Jin didn’t know how to react for a moment.
Song Xinglan squatted down, his expression serious, reaching out to touch the scar on Song Jin’s leg.
When his fingertips touched the skin, Song Jin seemed to suddenly realise something. His face turned pale. He lifted his leg and kicked Song Xinglan’s shoulder.
Song Xinglan’s expression was too serious, so serious that there was no trace of a smile. Especially with his newly shaved head, when he didn’t smile, he looked cold and wild, exuding a dangerous aura. He instantly reminds Song Jin of his past self. Memories of those forced recollections rushed back. Song Jin instinctively resisted any skin contact with Song Xinglan, as if it had become a kind of stress disorder.
Song Xinglan’s body fell unsteadily to the ground, his hands supporting him as he looked at Song Jin somewhat puzzled, “Ge?”
“You, get out,” Song Jin gasped, lowering his head. “Don’t stay in my room. Get out.”
By the second half of the sentence, his voice was somewhat uncontrollable. It was louder than usual, as if he were shouting. Song Xinglan immediately got up, hung his head, and walked out.
Before closing the door, Song Xinglan said, “Ge, I’m sorry.”
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*Translator’s Note: Wouldn’t blame SJ for overreacting. What SXL did was indeed traumatising. -K
Next update: -Daily-
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