VOLUME 3 — AUTUMN
Chapter 11: Tatarian Aster
──I never imagined that there would come a day when I would regret not taking that slight sense of discomfort seriously.
“Shiori?”
September was about to pass in the blink of an eye.
Standing side by side on the station platform at the usual spot where the train carriages stopped, I felt a slight unease as Shiori stared blankly into the distance.
Shiori raised her head in surprise at my words, as if suddenly coming back to reality.
There were small dark circles under her eyes, and when I asked what was wrong, she chuckled and said, “I stayed up late studying for tests…”
I was also nearing the final stage of studying for the entrance exams.
In order to take the test after receiving a recommendation, students will need to practice writing essays, so when they arrive at school early in the morning, the first thing they do is spread out the newspapers provided in the reference room.
After I finished writing my essay using the time and topic I had decided on, I went to my teacher for advice.
While I had received approval from the school, being a prestigious institution, I couldn’t afford to slack off until the end.
“See you tomorrow.”
After arriving at the station and saying farewell to Shiori, I headed to school as usual.
Since the start of the second term, I only saw Shiori during the morning train rides.
Especially now, during the most crucial time, I couldn’t afford to spend time on part-time jobs or leisurely study at the library after school. I would go straight home after school to focus on studying.
(…When the exams are over, I’ll be able to study at the library again.)
The time I spend studying with Shiori in the library was a very important and peaceful time.
I never thought that I would feel this way when I first met Shiori.
I was somewhat happy to realize that I had a kind of “normalcy” similar to people my age
.
From the station to the school wasn’t too far of a walk.
At this early hour, the only ones heading in the same direction were the underclassmen with morning practices for club activities and the exam students aiming for university, like me.
Passing through the gate, everyone dispersed to their respective destinations, as was repeated every morning.
And then─
At the entrance, I noticed a familiar figure looking at me from the elevator entrance, and I waved lightly in response to their gaze.
“Itsuki, good morning!”
“Aki, morning. You’re early today.”
With a refreshing smile that suited the morning, Aki raised his hand, and I returned a small smile.
Then, the unfamiliar companion next to Aki exchanged a few words with him before walking towards the schoolyard without talking to me in particular.
“I came early today to have my homeroom teacher look at my report.”
“Oh, I see. What about that guy just now? Is he okay?”
“Yeah, that guy. He’s aiming for a job instead of going to college, but he still participates in morning practices even though he retired from the soccer club. I happened to meet him at the station, so we came here together.”
“…I see. It’s strange for someone who retired to come early for morning practice. Isn’t it annoying for the underclassmen… or rather, he’s quite curious.”
“Haha, well, he really loves soccer. He’s been finding it tough not being able to play since he left the club.”
“Yeah, I guess.”
I listened to Aki’s story, my interest waning with each word, and I gave him perfunctory replies as we entered the school building. We parted ways in front of the staff room.
With that, I headed to the library, where no one else was around, and let out a sigh of relief.
Then, I sat down in the usual spot and picked up one of the newspapers scattered messily in front of me.
(…What should I choose as the theme for today?)
It seems that today’s newspaper hasn’t arrived here yet.
It’s probably because the career guidance teacher, who brings the newspaper every day, hasn’t arrived for work yet.
It can’t be helped. I quickly skim through the newspaper from a few years ago, thinking that anything would do for practice.
Topics about elections, political corruption, Japan’s economic situation at the time, environmental issues…
…And then.
A certain small article catches my eye, and I pause my scrolling finger on it.
“…There was a bus accident near here.”
It’s nothing special, just an article about a traffic accident that happens every day somewhere in Japan.
But when I think that such things are happening today, somewhere out of my sight and knowledge, I can’t help but think that even the fact that I am living here now, as if it were the most natural thing in the world, is not at all a given.
Maybe, it could be me tomorrow.
I need to cherish every single minute and second… I wouldn’t have thought about such things if it weren’t for Shiori, before I met her.
“Hey, Souma. You’re early again. Impressive, impressive.”
Vaguely thinking about such things while looking at the newspaper, the door suddenly opened.
The career guidance teacher, holding a newspaper in hand, came over with bed hair still intact, and casually placed it on my desk.
“Souma, you’re the most promising student this year. Seeing you work hard, all of us teachers can feel relieved.”
“…I’m not the kind of person who would be called a promising student, though.”
“Haha, well, whatever. Just don’t cause any problems at this point! It would be like throwing your life away. Everyone thinks you’ll be fine as long, unless something like that happens.”
“…I appreciate that.”
Don’t be ridiculous. Don’t say such irresponsible things so lightly.
Muttering such complaints in my heart, after a few exchanges that didn’t amount to anything, the teacher left the materials room noisily.
Once again, the space was enveloped in silence.
I closed the newspaper I had been reading and opened the one I had just been given, and I began to work quietly on my own.
＊ ＊ ＊
──The change came on the day the new semester began.
“Hey, Renji!! Did you apologize to Shiori properly!?”
“Shut up!! We’ve already resolved it. Don’t make a fuss about it now!!”
“Huh!? It’s because of you that I felt super uncomfortable! Ignoring me, are you a child!? You child!!”
“Don’t call me a child! With that attitude just now, I don’t want to talk to you anymore!”
“Ah! Then, will you please never talk to me again? Hey, Shiori, let’s go and leave this child behind, okay?”
“(Haha. Renji and Ayu-chan really get along well, don’t they?)”
At my laughter, the two of them shouted in unison, “What are you laughing about!!”
The second term of our second year in high school began with the usual long speech from the principal at the opening ceremony, and after finishing homeroom. School ended in the morning today.
After school, Ayu-chan suggested going to a family restaurant together for the first time in a while. Renji agreed without hesitation, and they both laughed.
(…Personally, I think the two of them suit each other very well.)
They’re in sync, or rather, too much in sync, so they easily end up arguing like they did just now, but even when they argue, they’re still in sync.
Above all, they always seem to be having fun.
When Renji was avoiding me and Ayu-chan, she seemed a bit down, but now she seems really lively.
Does Renji realize that Ayu-chan is the only one he can interact with like this without worrying too much?
The three of us left the gymnasium after the opening ceremony, alongside the two who were still arguing.
…As we were on our way to the classroom, I noticed some underclassmen looking our way and whispering to each other.
What’s going on…? I’ve been feeling these curious gazes since this morning, and I couldn’t help but eavesdrop on the underclassmen’s conversation.
“…Look, it’s that person.”
“Huh, really?”
“If that rumor is true, isn’t it super serious!?”
…Even though they’re trying to keep their voices down, I can hear them loud and clear.
But more than that, I was curious about what they were talking about… and I couldn’t help but look down, feeling uneasy.
“Shiori?”
“….”
Renji quickly noticed my situation and immediately called out to me.
Startled, I raised my head. Renji suddenly called out to his juniors, who seemed to think that he hadn’t found out yet.
“…Hey. What’s with the sneaky glances? It’s making me sick.”
At Renji’s low voice, the girls flinched for a moment.
“What? What are you talking about?”
“…Well, these girls have been sneaking glances at us and whispering for a while now.”
“Huh. What? Are they, like, Renji’s fangirls? If so, we’re not Renji’s girlfriend or anything, so it’s none of our concern, right?”
“Huh!? It’s not like that!!”
“Huh, really? Then what? What do you want?”
“No, I’m trying to ask that right now—”
“Um…!”
── I had a bad feeling.
“Hiratsuka Shiori-san… why can’t you speak?”
─── I have a bad feeling.
One of the girls, seemingly the leader, stepped forward and asked me directly.
Her eyes were filled with curiosity.
The words that were thrown at me so directly made not only me but also Renji and Ayu-chan hold our breaths, waiting for her next words.
“Well, since the end of summer vacation, there’s been a weird rumor spreading on Twitter.”
“…Twitter?”
“Senpais, don’t you use Twitter? There’s a tweet with our school name attached, and the name is hidden with ‘S.’ There are a lot of people who know about the senpais in our school, so someone quickly replied to the tweet saying, ‘The second-year student, Shiori Hiratsuka, can’t speak,’ and so on.”
She says this in a drawn-out tone, as if amused by our dumbfounded reaction. She pulls out her own cell phone and lightly touches the screen with her finger.
“See, see, here’s the tweet. It already has 215 retweets.”
Contrary to her cheerful voice, my heart raced with panic and confusion, and it wouldn’t calm down. I wanted to run away from here right now.
Still, I couldn’t look away. As I timidly glanced at the screen of the phone she handed me, I felt like I was going to forget how to breathe again.
[The reason why S’s voice stopped coming out at ○○ High School is seriously scary]
As I read the article on the screen, bordered in sky blue, the world lost its color and was dyed in despair.
Why.
Why, who, would do something like this─── It’s too late for something like this now.
“Is this… true? Whether this reason, true or false, all of us first-years have been…!”
“Gah… Don’t mess around!!”
“…”
“This… There’s no way this could be true…!!”
At Renji’s rough voice, the other girls besides me exaggeratedly shook their shoulders.
I was the only one who could do nothing but stand there dumbfounded, staring at the scene with a completely blank head as if it were someone else’s matter.
I couldn’t hide my confusion at what was really happening. Like a broken doll, I forgot how to even blink.
“…Who.”
“Huh?”
“…Who’s spreading such things!?”
“Ah! Hey…!”
However, Ayu-chan pushed away Renji, who was standing in front of her, and took her phone from her, and tapped the text in question.
Then the screen moved to the top of the account of the person who seemed to have posted the tweet in question.
As they scrolled through the various posts written there, now both Renji and Ayu-chan clenched their fists with expressions of confusion and anger on their faces.
“What… is this…”
[S’s story is undeniably true]
[Confirmed with people from S’s former school]
[Questions about S’s secret are being accepted]
[Hope to spread S’s story nationwide]
Those hostile words written there.
Words that gouge your heart.
One of them, yes. Five years ago──
[── S’s father is a murderer]
Those were the same words that took away my voice and connected me to a colorless world.
“Why… like this…! Because, this story, it’s… not something that should come up now…”
“So, it’s a true story after all?”
“No…!! Shiori’s father is…!”
“Who is Hiratsuka-senpai’s father?”
“…”
“See, Renji-senpai isn’t completely denying it, right? There are some people claiming to be from Mr. Hiratsuka’s former school who replied to this tweet saying it’s true. And now, Renji-senpai said, ‘It’s not something that should come up now,’ which means that this Twitter story is basically saying it’s true───”
“D-Don’t mess with me, you…!!”
“I…!”
“Renji…!!”
With a faint smile, she desperately tried to uncover the truth of the rumor. Renji, who seemed to have exceeded his limit of patience, roughly grabbed her shoulder.
In a panic, Ayu-chan hurried to stop him, and the girl, who seemed to be finally shaken by Renji’s aggressiveness, quickly stepped back.
I still vaguely understood each and every one of those exchanges in my blank mind, and somehow managed to keep my feet on the ground while breathing shallowly.
And then, slowly.
Slowly blinking, I clenched my fist──
“Shiori?”
I put her hand into my uniform pocket and pulled out my phone, I quietly tapped on the pitch-black screen.
Slowly, ever so slowly,
With trembling fingers, I managed to put together the words I wanted to convey and extended the phone to her, still wearing a face tinged with curiosity.
“…Huh? What’s this? You want me to read it…?”
“(Yes)”
She nodded while saying this, and with that as a signal, she snatched the cell phone from my hand.
She looked confused for a moment at my sudden action, but her curiosity quickly disappeared and she stared intently at the screen.
Her eyes sparkled with anticipation and joy, hoping to uncover the truth, as she busily scrolled through the text on the phone.
However, as she pursues the “truth” she seeks written there, her expression quickly becomes cloudy. The next time she looks up, her face twisted in confusion…
“I-Is this… true…?”
She looked at me with pity and frowned awkwardly.
In response to her words, I faintly smiled and nodded once.
Then, taking the phone back from her, I typed out words again and turned the screen towards her.
“(I’ll leave it up to you to decide whether to write about what you just heard from me on Twitter or not, and you can do whatever you like. In return, please forgive Renji for being so violent. I’m truly sorry.)”
“T-That’s….it’s nothing really…”
“(But I have one request. From now on, if anyone spreads this rumor or tweets anything new about me, can you promise not to react to it and just ignore it?)”
“That’s… easy enough…”
“(Thank you. Well, that’s all I ask of you.)”
“Huh. But, is it really okay to leave it at that? If what Senpai told me is true, shouldn’t I refute it…?”
As she furrowed her brows and continued to sway her gaze in search of the truth, I smiled at her and shook my head quietly.
“(Fighting hostility with hostility won’t change anything.)”
“…”
“(If there are people who believe in my words, that’s enough for me. So, whether you believe what I just told you or not, I leave it up to you. But… it’s very sad to hear my father being spoken ill of any further.)”
After telling her that much, she bowed her head apologetically once, still looking sorry, and then hurriedly left with the friends who had been watching our exchange from behind.
“Shiori…?”
Turning to Ayu-chan and Renji, who called out my name with concern, I smiled at them.
“(I’m okay.)”
“But, this is…”
“(Rumors about people last 75 days, right? So, I think everyone will forget it once they get tired of gossip again. Just like five years ago…)”
“…”
“(So, I’m okay. Shall we go back to the classroom?)”
With those words and a smile, the two of them didn’t say anything more.
“Are you okay?”
They must have noticed my bravado.
But even so, I kept smiling and said I was “okay.”
…I had to keep smiling.
To protect what’s important.
To protect the memories with my loved ones.
To protect my precious family, I vowed to endure any suffering.
I swore that I would endure any kind of suffering to protect my precious family.
Because five years ago, on that cold rainy day, I decided that I would always be there for my father.
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『Tatarian aster（シオン）』
Reminiscence・I Will Not Forget You
Thinking of someone far away
Purely, to the very end.
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