VOLUME 3 — AUTUMN
Chapter 12: Gentian
── As time swiftly passed since then, September, despite its nickname “long month,” faded away like a passing rain.
Gazing at the fading leaves that were starting to lose their color, I looked up at the sky and sighed deeply, a habit I had grown accustomed to,.
After hearing about the Twitter incident from our kohai, it seemed that Renji and Ayu-chan have done a lot of trial and error to identify the culprit, but in the end, they still haven’t identified the culprit.
Nevertheless, the culprit continued to tweet about me periodically, and I could feel the piercing stares and hear the whispers from students who were aware of it whenever I was at school.
Although I knew I shouldn’t let it bother me, I couldn’t help but listen closely to the approaching footsteps of that darkness.
“Shiori, did you not get enough sleep again today?”
“…”
In the morning, as I was lost in a daze, Itsuki-senpai’s gentle voice reached me.
When I quickly focused, I saw Senpai looking at me with a frown. I nodded in a fluster, my head throbbed slightly due to lack of sleep.
“(Uh, well… There’s this novel I got hooked on recently. So, I’ve been reading it passionately at night and ended up losing track of time…)”
Personally, I think that’s a poor excuse.
But it wasn’t the exam period, and I didn’t think Senpai would be satisfied unless I said something like this.
“…Huh. Is it that interesting of a book? Well, when I’m done with my exams, can you tell me the title? …But no matter how interesting the novel is, you still need to get enough sleep sometimes, you know?”
As Senpai peered into my face with narrowed eyes, I nodded repeatedly in agreement.
…Honestly, I wanted to tell Senpai everything multiple times.
I couldn’t count how many times I thought about Senpai everyrime I had sleepless nights.
But during this time, I couldn’t burden Senpai, who was preparing for exams.
I can’t make Senpai worry about unnecessary things.
“…Oh, by the way. It looks like it’s going to rain today.”
All I can do is keep my mouth shut and continue silently fighting the invisible enemy.
＊ ＊ ＊
That day, as predicted, cold rain began to fall in the afternoon.
“Oh, hey, isn’t that her? That girl, from that Twitter…?”
Rumors about me had spread throughout the school in the past month, and now not only the juniors but also students from the same year and even seniors whispered something whenever they saw me.
I couldn’t hear all of the whispers being exchanged.
But because I couldn’t hear all of it, I became even more curious and ended up hearing unnecessary voices. That’s the nature of gossip.
Especially when it was about me.
…It’s a vicious circle. It’s nothing but a vicious cycle.
“…Shiori? Are you okay?”
“…”
“Still… How about refuting the culprit on Twitter?”
It was Ayu-chan who proposed this idea to me as I walked down the corridor with my head down, and when I quickly looked up, our eyes met—her beautiful eyes filled with concern.
“(I-I’m fine!! Really, I’m fine!)”
“But… If it continues like this, Shiori…”
“(I don’t really mind it… but honestly, I do care a little bit. But it would only be more fun for the culprit if I make a strange argument. I think it’s a waste of time to even deal with them. What’s more, if I were to refute them, Ayu-chan might become a target too, so don’t worry!)”
“It’s not like it’s bothering me… But seriously, who’s the culprit? Even the account name, ‘Iikucchittini,’ is strange, and Shiori doesn’t remember anything that could have sparked these rumors, right?”
“(Yeah…)”
As I nodded slightly, Ayu-chan sighed and murmured, “Yeah…”
(I’m sorry, Ayu-chan. I’m truly sorry.)
I knew very well that I shouldn’t cause any more worry to Ayu-chan.
But there was nothing I could do, so all I could do was continue to apologize silently in my heart.
“…Renji?”
“…Ah, yeah.”
“What’s up? Were you waiting for us?”
“…Well, yeah.”
Ayu-chan spotted Renji on the way back to the classroom after the physical education class on a rainy day and greeted him as usual.
Lately, Renji, like me, seems to have a certain emptiness in his voice when we talk, and he has been spending a lot of time thinking about something.
…Even though I was able to make up with Renji.
Even though Ayu-chan had finally cheered up, I gradually grew increasingly frustrated with myself for making both of them sad and worried like this.
I had to do something.
At the very least, if I could keep my expressions and behavior in check, and as long as Ayu-chan and Renji, my precious friends, were by my side, I’ll be fine with it.
So, I needed to be stronger.
I needed to be tougher.
Clutching my fists, I raised my head with determination.
“(Ayu-chan, Renji. Listen, I’m really okay, and I won’t let it bother me anymore, so ──)”
“Ah! Hiratsuka-san, there you are! While we were absent from PE class, someone entered the classroom, and your name was written on the blackboard───”
However, unbeknownst to me, the approaching footsteps were steadily drawing closer, almost within reach.
[That killer’s daughter should leave this school]
[I can’t live my school life with peace of mind when Shiori Hiratsuka is around]
“…”
“…What’s this?”
The voice tinged with hostility stimulates the human desire to eavesdrop, turning the curiosity of some into malice.
And the footsteps that were once one became two, steadily undermining my carefree footing.
＊ ＊ ＊
Why did this happen?
By the time I realized it, it was too late, and I felt like I was about to lose control in anger.
“Hey hey, have you heard this rumor? It’s from a kid at the school across the station, and it seems legit.”
“Oh, I know this! My friend saw this girl on her way home yesterday and tried talking to her at the station, but she didn’t respond at all.”
“Seriously! Isn’t it creepy? Having a murderer’s kid around you.”
“Exactly! Even though it’s an old story and nobody knew back then, it’s just too much of a disaster to have someone from the same school.”
“But seriously, that’s crazy! If you spot her, call 110 or something. hey’re posting pictures of the suspect with their face blurred out, but it’s still the real deal!”
“Well, having the child of a murderer lurking around is definitely scary, right? So, it’s inevitable that it turned out like this, isn’t it?”
While listening to classmates who weren’t preparing for university exams discussing such matters during afternoon self-study, I focused silently on my desk.
When I looked out the window, it was raining as predicted.
I remembered that I met Shiori this morning, who didn’t have an umbrella. I wondered if she was okay.
I couldn’t help but think about that.
“But hey, just because her father is a murderer, does that mean the child can’t be caught?”
─── That’s why, perhaps.
Normally I wouldn’t care about it, but I ended up listening to the silly gossip that other people enjoy putting down others.
Perhaps it was because I had just been thinking about Shiori, the [name] pierced through me with unusual clarity.
“I wonder if something can be done about this Shiori Hiratsuka girl.”
“…”
I involuntarily turned my shoulders and glanced back at the guys gossiping animatedly.
The chair groaned dramatically as I moved, and those who were gossiping also turned their gaze to me.
“Hey, Souma. Sorry, were we too loud?”
“No, sorry. Could you tell me more about what you were just talking about?”
My classmates showed a slight flicker of unease at my reaction, considering I had never shown any interest in such gossip before.
But then, after a quick exchange of glances, they handed me their phones without hesitation.
“No, it’s just that, recently, it’s been a hot topic on Twitter. You know, the high school across the station?It seems to be about the students there, and we were just talking about it because we couldn’t believe it…”
“We couldn’t believe it,’ what do you mean? It’s because it’s personal that you’re all so happy to gossip about it without any hesitation, right?
Don’t try to justify gossiping so desperately, it’s pathetic.
I swallowed back the words that were about to burst out of my mouth and silently took the phone that was offered to me.
“…”
And there it was, row upon row of malice-filled words that made me doubt my own eyes.
Fighting back the urge to rush through the screen, I scrolled down, only to be overtaken by a surge of anger that I desperately tried to suppress with reason.
“…When did this rumor start spreading?”
Surprisingly, my voice came out calm.
Seemingly unaware of my demeanor, my classmates casually replied, “Maybe from the end of summer vacation?”
The end of summer vacation? So it had been over a month already?
“Do you know who started saying it?”
“Well, when you put it that way, who could it be? Do you know?”
“Oh, it’s, you know, that ‘Iikucchittini’ person. The one with the most retweeted tweets. They’re still periodically tweeting about the rumor about ‘S’.”
Following their words, I tapped on the tweets from that ridiculous name, and it took me to the person’s account page.
There, lined up before me, were countless words filled with an unbearable amount of malice and animosity.
At that extremely unpleasant sentence, I could feel the furrows deepening between my brows, this time beyond any pretense of disguise
“Hey, Souma?”
Seeing my suddenly distorted expression, my classmate let out a voice of confusion.
Even in front of them, I couldn’t hide anything anymore. I was completely unable to control my emotions at that moment.
“Hey, Itsuki, what are you doing? Skipping class? The typical behavior of a relaxed exam-taker!”
“Hey, Tama! Itsuki’s in an important time right now, so don’t bother him── Itsuki!?”
“…”
And before I knew it, my body was moving on its own.
My feet started running, and I followed my heart straight to her.
I ran frantically toward her, where she would likely be standing under the cold rain.
＊ ＊ ＊
“Who… who did this!? This isn’t a joke…!”
Renji’s voice was rough with anger, his fists trembling in rage.
Ayu-chan stood beside me, holding me as I stared blankly at the words boldly written on the blackboard.
But right now, I couldn’t feel Renji’s angry voice or Ayu-chan’s warmth or anything else.
My hands trembled faintly.
My lips grew cold.
My throat burned as if it was on fire.
“Doing something like this, aren’t you ashamed…?!”
Right now, all I can do is desperately hold back the tears that are about to fall.
In the silence that fell over the classroom, only Renji’s ragged breathing echoed.
“…But, it’s true, isn’t it?”
Someone couldn’t bear the silence anymore and muttered softly.
“I-I mean, yeah! And it wasn’t us, okay?!”
“Cuz, when we got back from PE class, it was already written there!”
“I’m sorry for Hiratsuka, but if you’re a student in this school, you should know this rumor by now, so it’s wrong to just accuse us!!”
The voices that rose one after another were probably everyone’s true feelings.
When one person crossed the red light, others followed suit one after another.
Before I knew it, even students from other classes who seemed to have heard the commotion gathered around us, surrounding our classroom as if encircling us.
“You… you don’t even know…! It’s wrong for all of you to gang up on her just based on rumors!”
“…”
Once again, Renji’s classmates fell silent.
But it was only temporary, as those who had already crossed the red light didn’t stop.
Because if they stopped now, they might get hurt themselves.
“W-We don’t… know anything! And, actually, Hiratsuka can’t talk, and there are parts that match the rumors, so it’s normal for us to believe the rumors!!”
“And besides, Hiratsuka didn’t deny it, and you guys didn’t deny the rumors either!”
“T-That’s…”
“And look! Even now, you’re not trying to explain anything about that ‘not knowing anything’ part!”
The criticism, accusation, denial, attack, voices flying around, and many stares.
All of this made me think that maybe I was actually at fault.
I was the one who asked Renji and Ayu-chan not to say anything.
And they kept their silence as I asked, enduring it with me.
They were protecting me.
“Have you guys even thought about our feelings?! You guys pretend to be nice people, but you’re just hypocrites!!”
“H-hypocrite, that’s something…”
“Don’t just make us the bad guys!!”
And yet, right now, I’m the one who’s hurting them both.
All the blame directed at Renji and Ayu-chan was because of me.
Because of my clueless and foolish self, everything became irreparable.
It wasn’t supposed to be like this.
No matter how many times I tried to come up with excuses like “I never thought this would happen,” it was already too late for everything.
Even though I wanted to protect Renji and Ayu-chan, I couldn’t find a way to do so.
A number of hostile and curious eyes were directed towards me.
I could barely stand here listening to so many heartless voices and words being whispered.
“We’re not… the bad ones.”
─── Everything had reached its limit.
I wasn’t mature enough or strong enough to look straight ahead in this situation.
I couldn’t even protect the people I cared about─── I was just a petty coward.
(… Help me,)
In my heart, I screamed in a voice that couldn’t be heard.
(Help me. Help me, help me… save me.)
Even though I knew I could never say it out loud, I kept screaming in my heart over and over again.
All I could do was keep screaming.
“You guys might think you’re righteous for protecting Hiratsuka, but don’t get too full of yourselves.”
“Yeah, that’s right. It takes quite a bit of courage to say things to you guys on behalf of everyone.”
“And seriously, before you start acting all high and mighty, maybe you should consider how much trouble you’re causing us──”
“Even though we tried to help you guys a bit.”
“…Those who can’t stand up alone shouldn’t act so high and mighty.”
“…”
“I mean, ‘justice,’ huh? High schoolers like us aren’t exactly paragons of morality who can preach ambiguous morals to others.”
In the quiet classroom once again, a voice clear as a bell echoed.
As I lifted my head in surprise at the familiar voice, I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw the unexpected person standing before me.
In my blurred vision, that person looked straight at me and smiled warmly, completely contrary to the cold air surrounding us.
(…Why. Why is he here, like this…)
“(Wha… why…?)”
“…You didn’t have an umbrella, so I came to pick you up.”
“…”
“Today’s rain is unusually cold. You’ll catch a cold without an umbrella, you know?”
─── Why is Itsuki-senpai here?
Itsuki-senpai smiled softly.
I, still unsure if this was reality or a dream, could only stare at him dumbfoundedly.
Seeing my expression, he said in his usual tone, “Shiori, you’re making a funny face.”
His usual tone and demeanor naturally loosened my tense heart.
But only Itsuki-senpai could be so normal, and that alone didn’t make everything return to normal for me. The atmosphere surrounding me now wasn’t gentle at all.
“Hey, who are you…!”
“And, wait, that uniform… it’s from the boys’ school across the station…”
The classroom buzzed again.
The classmates who had been talking about justice just moments ago now spat out words tinged with confusion.
But Itsuki-senpai, who was not at all fazed by this, just swept them away with his gaze and then slowly turned his eyes to the blackboard.
“…How ridiculous.”
A little bit. The senior spoke with a tone of contempt.
Ahead of the senior’s gaze.
Written there were words scrawled on the board, words he definitely didn’t want to see.
Feeling a tightness in my chest, I managed to exhale and clenched my trembling fists in front of my chest.
I forced my legs to move from where they were stuck to the floor, and I rushed to the blackboard with the eraser in hand.
And then, with another trembling breath, I reached out to erase the words written, but…
“…”
My hand was suddenly stopped by Itsuki-senpai’s hand, which appeared next to mine.
“…The uniform will get dirty, so can I borrow it?”
“…”
Again, Itsuki-senpai said such a thing in a soft voice, and without a word, he took the eraser from me and began to erase the words written on the blackboard.
The malice slowly being erased by Itsuki-senpai’s hand.
As I stared blankly at it, the blackboard was quickly covered in an uncertain white color.
As I continued to stare at the now illegible words on the blackboard, I heard the sound of a hand brushing next to me.
Startled back to reality, I saw Itsuki-senpai once again directing a cold gaze at my classmates.
“(S-Senpai… um,)”
“…If you ever do something this foolish again, I’ll make sure you face the same consequences.”
“…”
“You know what I mean, right? On the side of justice, huh?”
Silencing me before I could even utter a word, my senior spoke with a chilling voice that belied his smiling face, addressing the classmates who were watching his actions in stunned silence
With the atmosphere and demeanor Itsuki-senpai exuded, my classmates gulped nervously and fell silent.
Smiling softly at their reactions, Itsuki-senpai continued to gaze outside the classroom and slowly spoke.
“──Those who spread rumors for fun, hurting innocent people’s feelings, are just as guilty.”
“…”
“Did she do something to deserve being belittled by the people here? Did she deserve to be attacked one-sidedly like this, as if it were natural?”
“──,”
“Those who protect themselves by conforming to others’ opinions even when nothing was done to them. What do you think of people who enjoy hurting others without cause? What do you think of people who stand in the same position as those who started the rumors?”
“…”
“…If it were me, I’d be sorry if I turned into such a pathetic person.”
With those words spoken in a matter-of-fact tone, Itsuki-senpai once again swept the surroundings with his gaze, then turned his eyes to me.
His eyes, clear and straight.
As I continued to gaze back at him, he quietly extended his hand in front of me.
“I’m tired today… so let’s go home.”
“…”
Once again, in the face of Itsuki-senpai’s gentle smile and words, my vision blurred faintly.
Nodding softly once, I gently placed my hand in his, and his hand grasped mine back silently.
Still as cold and delicate as ever, as if they were going to break at any moment.
Yet his hand was gentler and warmer than anyone else’s.
“Can’t really say much about skipping class if I’m doing it too, huh?”
Itsuki-senpai joked as he pulled me along.
And with his words, the tears that had welled up in my eyes─── were no longer stained with sadness.
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『Gentian（リンドウ）』
Justice・Honesty
Even in your sorrow, my love for you remains.
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