Heewoon slightly moved away from Kangwoo’s embrace, fearing that Kangwoo might hear the sound of his heartbeat, but Kangwoo’s large hand pulled his shoulder back into the embrace.
“I’m not angry at you.”
Seo Kangwoo seemed to misunderstand. When Heewoon looked up at him, he smiled with his eyes curved.
“There are only a few days left anyway. Now that you have more time, what do you plan on doing, Sunbae?”
Seo Kangwoo’s contemplating look as he ruffled Heewoon’s hair appeared joyful. Heewoon grew grim. He should have just told his students that he wanted to quit. He had almost gotten hit earlier. Receiving money is always great, why do I need to worry so much?
Whether entangled by money or not, it’s all meaningless if I die. Kangwoo probably wouldn’t kill him, but he might end up somewhere worse. Heewoon recalled the crushed and blood-stained fingers from that moment. And followed by the face of Lee Hyukjin, soaked in blood.
Heewoon squeezed his eyes shut.
“Are you sleepy?”
Kangwoo asked in a whisper. Heewoon made a muffled sound of agreement and Kangwoo’s body shifted slightly. Then, the room darkened as if a switch had been turned off.
There were four days left in this month.
***
Heewoon blinked his eyes open.
“Uhh…”
He squeezed his eyes shut again, startled by the sunlight that immediately pierced his eyes.
“Have you woken up?”
At the sound of the voice coming from right next to him, Heewoon blinked his eyes open again, only to be blinded once more by the light. He covered his eyes with his palms and blinked a few times, tears pooling in his eyes.
“You look like an idiot.”
Kangwoo chuckled and ruffled Heewoon’s hair. Standing in front of the bed, Kangwoo was wearing a comfortable t-shirt and trousers. Seeing his slightly damp hair, probably just from the shower, Heewoon realized he had fallen asleep yesterday.
Without even informing his mother.
Heewoon sat up abruptly, looking around. Where did he put his phone again?
“What are you looking for? Your phone?”
“Yeah. Because I didn’t call my mom.”
Heewoon anxiously rubbed his forehead. Kangwoo observed him briefly and handed him the phone from the table.
“You didn’t even notice the incoming call last night, Sunbae. You slept like a log.”
“Ah…”
His mother never told him, but Heewoon knew that his mom gets anxious when she can’t reach him. It was because his father, who hadn’t been in touch with her for a few days, turned out to be found in the Han River.
“It rang a few times, so I answered it.”
“…Huh?”
Heewoon’s eyes widened. His face grew paler and paler.
“I told her that Sunbae seemed tired while doing an assignment and fell asleep, and that you’d be home around noon tomorrow.”
“….”
“…But what’s with your expression?”
Kangwoo furrowed his brow as he looked at Heewoon’s rigid face.
“What did you talk to my mom about?”
Heewoon gathered his courage to ask that.
Kangwoo stared at Heewoon with a furrowed brow. His jaw clenched, he turned to Heewoon and asked.
“Are you scared because I might have said other things to her?”
Heewoon opened his mouth, then closed it again. He swallowed a dry gulp, his Adam’s apple bobbing. He repeatedly pursed his lips, his voice trembled as he struggled to speak.
“About my mom…”
“Say louder.”
Heewoon was evidently being anxious and Kangwoo spoke coldly to him. Heewoon lowered his gaze and cleared his throat.
“You said you would kill my mom.”
“….”
“I really didn’t tell anyone else, Kangwoo.”
Kangwoo sighed as he watched Heewoon in silence. His skinny shoulders were drooping. The fallen blanket covered only his lower body, and his pale upper torso was covered in bruises. His teary, large eyes looked up at Kangwoo pleadingly.
“I thought you were thinking of something else…”
Kangwoo muttered to himself. The breath that escaped Heewoon’s lips trembled softly. Kangwoo’s pupils shifted gently, as if scrutinizing Heewoon’s face. After a moment, he spoke.
“Sunbae, do you know that you clung to me all night?”
“What?”
“I thought you were cold, so I turned on the heater, but you kept digging into my arms.”
“I-I didn’t realize that. I’m sorry.”
That came unexpectedly and Kangwoo still hadn’t answered Heewoon’s question. But Heewoon had no choice but to match with Kangwoo’s mood.
“You don’t have to be sorry about that.”
Kangwoo said casually and stroked Heewoon’s hair. Heewoon’s hair, sprawled in various directions, was pressed down firmly under his large hand.
Seo Kangwoo seemed lost in thought, looking into the air. It seemed like a frightening thought. So Heewoon hurriedly grabbed the hem of Kangwoo’s shirt.
Kangwoo glanced at the hand clutching on his T-shirt. Woo Heewoon’s hand was so pale that blue veins were visible.
“K-Kangwoo.”
Kangwoo’s gaze shifted to Heewoon’s face. The moist pupils flowed softly in the morning light.
“I was wrong about everything…”
“Shh.”
Kangwoo pressed a finger to the lips, making Heewoon shut his mouth tightly. Kangwoo patted Heewoon’s head as if praising him, then bent down his waist. He faced Heewoon who was sitting on the bed, and spoke softly.
“What I mentioned earlier were all the things I told your mother. I introduced myself as your junior, said goodnight, and hung up.”
“Ah…”
A sense of relief washed over Heewoon’s face as he nodded. The hand that gripped the T-shirt remained as it was.
“I’m quite worried that you won’t listen to me, but…”
Kangwoo looked at Heewoon, elongating his words. A faint, linear mark was left on his left cheek. Kangwoo lowered his eyes and let out a windy laugh.
“I won’t do anything to Sunbae’s mother.”
“Huh?”
Heewoon’s eyes widened, and another chuckle escaped Kangwoo’s lips. With a smirk on his face, he said.
“Even if I get angry, I’ll be satisfied with just you, Sunbae.”
It was a frightening remark. However, Heewoon felt reassured by those words. Being with Seo Kangwoo made him think a bit strangely.
“T-Thank you…”
“Thank you?”
Kangwoo repeated Heewoon’s words, chuckling softly.
“Go wash up and have breakfast.”
Kangwoo’s large hand tousled Heewoon’s hair.
“And take your hand off.”
“Oh! S-sorry!”
Heewoon let go of the T-shirt in surprise. It was visibly wrinkled, so he got worried, but Kangwoo just pulled him closer, kissing the top of his head several times.
Then Kangwoo’s lips moved lower and lower, then he got turned on and they had sex from the morning. Heewoon had struggled during the shower as his legs felt weak, but he was glad that his worry was gone now.
‘Even if I get angry, I’ll be satisfied with just you, Sunbae.‘
Heewoon recalled those words once again. He remembered the expression and tone Seo Kangwoo had when saying that. One by one, these thoughts flooded his mind.
It seemed like Kangwoo had been contemplating, as if he hadn’t originally intended to say such words. His expression and tone were very tender.
Heewoon felt like he could now worry about his mother less. There was no point in not believing Seo Kangwoo’s words.
Wearing his own clothes and underwear, which seemed to be fresh as if they just got washed, Heewoon went down to the first floor. The breakfast menu was bone broth. The clear broth was rich with chunks of meat.
Considering other foods, the broth was easy to eat, so Heewoon finished it all without leaving anything behind. As he drank water to get rid of the aftertaste, he felt someone’s gaze on him.
“Why?”
Kangwoo shook his head as he glanced at the empty bowl.
“What do you usually do at this hour?”
“Work on assignments or prepare for tutoring…”
Seo Kangwoo seemed to be in a very good mood this morning. From what he had said earlier and now, it was clear. He even told Heewoon to use the study room and prepared him some snacks.
Since Heewoon had come straight from tutoring yesterday, he was relieved that he had brought the tutoring materials. He flipped open the workbook and fidgeted with a small tray. Coffee and macarons were neatly arranged on the tray.
Just a few days ago, a person was almost reduced to a dough here. But looking around, there was no trace of that incident.
Heewoon stared at the fat macaron. Seo Kangwoo seemed to know that he loved macarons.
He had once said that as if he wasn’t tormenting Heewoon. He might have been right. Those who torment others are usually unaware of their own actions.
But to Seo Kangwoo, what did he think he was doing with Heewoon?
***
It was Thursday, October 31st. In the past few days, Kangwoo hadn’t beaten Heewoon even once. He had only been nice to him.
That made Heewoon feel even scarier.
“Today is the last day of your tutoring job, right?”
With a bag over his shoulder, Kangwoo asked Heewoon, who was standing by. Heewoon still hadn’t told his students about quitting tutoring. A strange sense of sinking and an inexplicable growing fear were growing within him.
“Yeah.”
Heewoon replied. His heart was pounding madly.
Kangwoo, who had been looking at Heewoon silently, tilted his head slightly.
“Okay. Then, how about we go to Incheon tomorrow for grilled clams?”
Heewoon still had classes tomorrow night. The time would be tight to go all the way to Incheon and back.
“…Uh… I-I don’t really like clams…”
“You ate them last time.”
Rendered speechless, Heewoon’s lips trembled. He had been eating various foods with Seo Kangwoo lately, and clams were one of them.
“Well, let’s go somewhere else.”
Heewoon heaved a silent sigh of relief.
“I heard there’s a place where they grill shrimp and pork together.”
“Alright.”
In Incheon.
Heewoon’s complexion turned pale at Kangwoo’s additional comment. Kangwoo spread his arms as he looked at Heewoon. Heewoon approached Kangwoo, who was sitting on the bed. Kangwoo wrapped his arms around Heewoon’s waist and patted his buttocks lightly.
Kangwoo’s affectionate treatment evoked two conflicting emotions in Heewoon. It occasionally made him delude himself into thinking that they were on equal footing, and sometimes it terrified him that Kangwoo could become cruel at any moment.
This current situation was the result of that. If Seo Kangwoo had been a little more terrifying these past few days, Heewoon would have quit tutoring right away. Then he wouldn’t be feeling this anxious right now.
“Aren’t you going? Can you be late for your last tutoring job?”
“N-no…”
Heewoon hesitated for a moment before walking out. Kangwoo rested his chin on his hand as he watched Heewoon’s hunched back.
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