“Sunbae.”
“…Yeah.”
Heewoon answered unconsciously. Then Kangwoo smiled warmly. Heewoon thought he had forgotten all these, but the smile he used to like came vividly to his mind. It was so clear. This time, he noticed the subtle differences in Kangwoo’s lips that were now softer and the corners of his eyes that went down deeper. There was a difference in the way his eyes looked at him, as if engraved on his face, more than back then.
Kangwoo furrowed his thick eyebrows, looking confused.
“Ah. If you stare at me like this, I don’t feel like going anywhere.”
His firm thumb gently wiped under Heewoon’s eyes. ‘Like this.‘ Heewoon pondered on that word. He didn’t know exactly how it was, but he understood that he shouldn’t do that.
As Kangwoo traced his cheek, he casually looked at his wristwatch. Heewoon asked.
“Are you busy?”
“Just us being like this, the sun might even start setting.”
It was an incomprehensible statement. Kangwoo, looking at Heewoon’s dazed face, said casually with a nonchalant expression.
“If it gets dark, I can’t see anything and won’t be able to bury you.”
“…”
Heewoon briefly bit his lip in shock. It was genuinely scary when Seo Kangwoo said these things, because it felt so real. Even if he said it was a joke. As Kangwoo’s hand retreated, Heewoon turned his head to look out the window.
Kangwoo smiled slightly as he observed Heewoon’s face reflected in the window.
Their destination was an observatory. After Heewoon put on his padded jacket, wrapped a scarf around his neck, the two got out of the car. The sun had already set, turning the sky above into a deep blue.
Heewoon adjusted the wrinkles that formed from being forcefully folded in the bag. The wrinkles were so distinct that they didn’t easily disappear.
At that moment, Kangwoo’s fingers lightly touched his forehead. He must have been frowning without realizing it. Kangwoo grazed his forehead slightly, before withdrawing and saying.
“Let’s have coffee and dinner here.”
“Okay.”
They bought two cups of warm coffee from a small café next to a convenience store. Sitting side by side on a bench, the scenery was breathtaking, overlooking the entire Seoul.
“If you’re cold, tell me.”
Heewoon stared at Kangwoo’s face intently, then he asked.
“Will you hug me?”
“You know that well.”
The corners of Kangwoo’s mouth curled up. Heewoon only nodded and looked straight ahead. The sky was so clear that everything in the distance could be seen clearly.
“What did you do at the department store?”
“I bought gifts for my mom and my aunt, then I walked around a bit. Oh, I also went to a cafe.”
Kangwoo nodded and brushed off some breadcrumbs from Heewoon’s clothes. Then, he casually asked.
“Did you attend your lecture this morning?”
“Yeah.”
After Heewoon answered, he suddenly recalled that Kangwoo had mentioned having a family dinner today. Didn’t he also mention having two older brothers? Conglomerate families were known to have strained relationships even among siblings. Given that bad relationship, they might make jokes about killing each other.
Heewoon pursed his lips while looking at Kangwoo. If Kangwoo had kept looking at the sky, he wouldn’t have asked, but Kangwoo turned his head to look at him, prompting him to ask the question.
“Were your brothers at the dinner?”
“Both of my brothers were there, and also my aunt’s family. My father and stepmother were there too.”
Kangwoo answered with a gentle voice.
“Stepmother?”
Kangwoo nodded. Heewoon thought, maybe Seo Kangwoo had also suffered abuse from his stepmother, leading to his current personality. Come to think of it, it was strange for him to live alone in such a big house. Maybe he was kicked out by his stepmother.
Heewoon had once searched for information about Kangwoo’s father’s company. Information about his two brothers was available, but details about Seo Kangwoo were hard to find.
Were his two brothers the children of his stepmother?
“He remarried three years ago.”
“…Then, what about your biological mother?”
“She passed away when I was in high school.”
Watching Heewoon’s complex expression as if pondering something, the corners of Kangwoo’s mouth subtly raised up.
“Why do you live alone?”
“My relationship with my father and brothers isn’t that great.”
Heewoon was about to ask why but was surprised at himself, shutting his mouth. How did he end up asking so many questions? He used to avoid getting involved just a few months ago. It seemed Seo Kangwoo’s nonchalant responses without annoyance played a part in it. Also that his responses were quite ordinary.
“They didn’t like it that I was learning under my grandfather.”
Kangwoo said, sighing.
“What kind of work is it?”
“All sorts of things.”
Heewoon thought he should stop questioning, looking at Kangwoo’s bright smile. He swallowed back the curiosity that kept escaping his mouth.
Curiosity had always been his problem, whether it was starting stalking or following Seo Kangwoo’s car that one day.
Heewoon concludingly erased the hypothesis that Kangwoo grew up having such personality due to abuse from his stepmother. If he grew up frighteningly like that due to a complicated family situation, there might be about three in ten people on the streets who were like him.
As the sky turned navy blue, and a vivid red burst forth from behind the mountains, Kangwoo suddenly spoke.
“Let’s go out tomorrow during the day.”
“But it’s Monday. Aren’t you going to work?”
Heewoon widened his eyes.
“My graduation ceremony is tomorrow.”
Although Kangwoo wasn’t attending the graduation ceremony, he was thinking of skipping his work. He hadn’t been able to spend time leisurely lately, so taking Heewoon to anywhere seemed like a good idea. Lost in thought, Kangwoo belatedly noticed Heewoon biting his lips.
“Do you have something else to do?”
“No.”
Kangwoo tilted his head slightly.
“Then, did you forget how to answer?”
It was a quiet tone. However, Heewoon was startled, raising his head abruptly. If he made a small mistake here, the current gentle atmosphere might turn sharply tense.
“I was curious if your family members won’t come to the graduation ceremony….”
Hesitatingly, Heewoon spoke, and Kangwoo stared at him silently. His eyebrows were slightly lowered, and those unmoving round pupils. Heewoon, with his nose wrinkled, continued to gaze at Kangwoo.
In no time, the tension disappeared from the small face, leaving only curiosity. Kangwoo’s lips twitched. He let out a small breath and said.
“No one from my family will be coming.”
Kangwoo thought to hide that he also had no intention of going.
“I see.”
Heewoon nodded. It seemed he had concluded that the family situation wasn’t harmonious. The pale lips, which seemed ready to spit out more words, were tightly sealed. Kangwoo felt a bit disappointed. He suddenly wanted to see Heewoon scared out of fear. However, restraining his impulses, he gently asked.
“Will you come, Sunbae?”
Looking at Kangwoo with a faint smile, Heewoon nodded. It sounded like a request, but, in fact, Heewoon didn’t have other choices to answer.
“Mom, here’s a New Year’s gift.”
Heewoon extended a paper bag to his mom.
“A gift? What’s this?”
As his mom unwrapped it, her eyes widened. She saw the logo on the box.
“This isn’t something expensive, is it?”
“…No, it isn’t. It’s just that the private tutoring student’s mother gave me a gift card, and I used that to buy this.”
Heewoon shivered at the lie smoothly coming out of his mouth. Watching his mom take out and put on the scarf with delight, he felt two emotions simultaneously, guilt and hopeful.
Maybe if he just withstood a bit of discomfort, they could become happier.
“How does Mom look?”
“It suits you well.”
Looking into a small mirror, his mother looked girlish. Heewoon smiled slightly. As his mother gently touched the scarf around her neck, she mumbled.
“I don’t have anyone to show this off.”
“…”
Heewoon bit the inside of his cheek. It was sad and infuriating. He could understand his mother’s feelings. But, just why did she have to say such things now?
When his mom wasn’t looking, Heewoon took a deep breath and spoke cheerfully.
“Hyung will be coming soon. Let’s go out together and have a good time then.”
“That’s right. Your hyung will be coming home after making a lot of money. He boasted a lot about letting Mom go on a vacation.”
His mother’s complexion brightened a bit. The brother who boasted about letting her go on a vacation was not here. Looking at the scarf hanging around his mom’s neck, Heewoon said.
“Did you get a call from Hyung recently?”
“Yeah. But he said it would take about two more months.”
It would have been nice if he had come just in time for the New Year. His mother mumbled to herself, sounding disappointed.
“Did he make a lot of money?”
“Yeah. He said it’s so much that it’s getting hard for him to handle.”
“I hope that’s really true.”
Looking at his mother’s scarf, Heewoon spoke in a whisper, a soft voice like a secret.
It was the next morning. He was getting ready to go out after having breakfast when a call came from his aunt.
“Hmm? The scarf?”
His mother, who received the call, turned around, her eyes widening. Heewoon felt very tense under her intense gaze.
“Oh, I see. I guess he got a gift card from the family where he tutors. Did you have breakfast yet?”
His mother turned her head away and asked. It was a short sentence. Normally, she would brag about how well Heewoon had tutored his students, speculating that they must have given the gift card because of that.
His mother might have finally noticed that something was strange. While putting on his scarf, Heewoon looked at his mother’s back. Looking at her much more petite figure than in his distant memories, he thought that he needed to be more careful.
“Mom, I’ll be back.”
“Sure, have a safe trip-”
As he stepped out of the room, he heard his mother’s voice.
“He’s going to his junior’s graduation. Oh, right.”
This morning, when Heewoon mentioned about going to a junior’s graduation, his mother asked.
Is he the junior you’ve been close with these days? The one who introduced us to the hospital?
Although he had been pretending to meet many different friends and classmates to avoid looking strange if he only kept meeting the same person, his mother accurately guessed it.
Wearing white sneakers, Heewoon reminded himself, Let’s be a bit more careful.
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