Jiang Huan’s eyes instantly filled with tears as he cried out, “No… zombies don’t have intelligence; they’re nothing like you…”
“Shut up, you brat!”
The child choked in fear, hiccupped from crying, and after a long pause, cautiously asked, “Brother, is this radiation sickness you have? Also, I…I will behave!”
Shen Shanwu impatiently replied, “I am a zombie; I don’t want to take care of a child. Rescuing you was just a matter of convenience. Don’t start relying on me; you have to leave tomorrow. If you refuse to go, I’ll just leave you here.”
“Brother, brother, please! I have nowhere to go, really…”
…
“Shanwu, brother… brother…”
Now, nearly seven years have passed since the kidnapping incident in the fourth year after the apocalypse. Jiang Huan could only toss and turn in his dreams, restlessly calling out the name he missed and longed for the most: “Brother, Shanwu… don’t go… don’t leave me…”
His whispers were filled with pain and repression, saturated with the humility and pleading of lowering his dignity to the ground.
Shen Shanwu slowly opened his eyes, his gaze clear and showing no trace of fatigue. He was well aware that Jiang Huan had a habit of talking in his sleep when he was restless, but this time, the content of the dream talk greatly surprised him.
Time seemed to roll back several years, to when the young Jiang Huan, who was still growing, was always hungry and never seemed to be satisfied, no matter how much he was fed. Shen Shanwu found this extremely annoying; he would often scowl in response. Jiang Huan would cry and follow behind him, initially trembling in fear, but later, having figured out his temperament, he would cling to him when Shen Shanwu was angry, calling out, “Brother, Shanwu, Shanwu…”
At that time, there was no covenant between the mutated and human beings, and Shen Shanwu didn’t know how to interact with humans. To conveniently obtain food and radiation protection supplies, he openly showcased his abilities and traded with small human shelters and roaming black market merchants to exchange for what Jiang Huan needed.
He had replaced Jiang Huan’s protective suit and mask countless times by hand, and Jiang Huan was always clingy. If he left him alone for even a moment, he would look back at him with the same wet, abandoned puppy eyes, instantly filling Shen Shanwu with guilt.
What did Jiang Huan dream about? Did he dream of those past events?
Why did Jiang Huan repeatedly call his name with such a tone of longing on his lips? If Jiang Huan still missed him and felt reluctant to part, then why… why throw away everything that belonged to him?
Why throw away the gift he had carefully prepared for months? Why treat his feelings so cruelly?
From the Peace Zone in the Sichuan-Tibet region to the eastern coastal base, Shen Shanwu collected all the novel, interesting, and fun things he had encountered along the 4,000 kilometers between them. He carefully disinfected them, placing the items with high radiation in radiation-proof glass containers at great expense, while the rest were wrapped into package after package.
He treated all of this as a birthday gift for Jiang Huan, hoping to let him see the sights and experiences he had encountered.
But just a few months later, Shen Shanwu saw his large box filled with goods at the coastal base’s radiation waste station. The outside was stamped with a steel seal indicating it contained highly radioactive hazardous waste, and inside, it remained unopened, with the thousands of words he had written quietly lying within.
Thinking back to the time when he meticulously wrote those neat penmanship letters under the moonlight, his once fervent obsession now seemed quite ridiculous. Shen Shanwu had once imagined with great enthusiasm that Jiang Huan would be amazed by the content upon receiving the letter, perhaps even pleading for him to take him along next time.
He had envisioned many scenarios but never considered that the recipient wouldn’t even open it.
At that moment, Shen Shanwu suddenly realized that he hadn’t seen Jiang Huan in over a year. Ever since Jiang Huan was recognized by his grandfather and returned to the human settlement, the opportunities for Shen Shanwu to see him had become increasingly rare.
At first, Shen Shanwu would come by almost every month. Due to his identity as a mutated being, their meetings were quite complicated, so he switched to visiting once every three months. Eventually, Jiang Huan always seemed busy, and the letters he sent out were like stones sinking into the sea, receiving no replies at all.
He wasn’t foolish; he knew Jiang Huan couldn’t possibly be so busy that he didn’t have time to respond to a letter. Yet, at that time, Shen Shanwu had a misplaced confidence, believing that Jiang Huan would always be that admiring child, eagerly awaiting his arrival with eyes full of dependence. His inflated confidence led him to overlook these details entirely.
When all the illusory façades were completely torn apart at the waste station, revealing the most grotesque truths in a bloody manner, Shen Shanwu felt a pain so intense that he could hardly breathe.
If Shen Shanwu’s heart was filled with murderous intent and coldness over He Jingyang’s betrayal, then his feelings toward Jiang Huan’s indifference were only disappointment and a desire to escape.
He could only deceive himself into thinking that perhaps there was a misunderstanding, or maybe there were reasons behind it. However, he could no longer muster the initiative to go to the coastal base to look for Jiang Huan. Perhaps, over time, rumors would spread that Jiang Huan was inquiring about his whereabouts from other mutated beings?
Shen Shanwu held onto this hope for many years, until he eventually forgot about it… When he stood before Jiang Huan again, he surprisingly found that he couldn’t even summon the thought of being angry with him. All that remained was a faint sense of nostalgia lingering in his heart, sighing softly, “Little guy, it’s been a long time.”
The dream gradually came to an end, and Jiang Huan’s eyelashes fluttered, a sign that he was about to wake up. Shen Shanwu hurriedly closed his eyes and pretended to be asleep, even considering whether he should feign a few soft snores.
Aside from Jiang Huan’s ragged breathing, Shen Shanwu heard another sound: someone was unzipping a sleeping bag and stealthily getting up.
The lieutenant noticed the movement and shook the light, and the two seemed to engage in a silent exchange, with only the sound of fabric rubbing against each other filling the air.
Shen Shanwu assumed it was someone from the team getting up in the night to use the restroom, so he didn’t pay much attention, focusing instead on how to pretend to be asleep to avoid alarming Jiang Huan. However, after crawling out of the sleeping bag, the person gradually walked closer to Jiang Huan and Shen Shanwu, eventually stopping right next to their sleeping bags.
Shen Shanwu found himself in a fierce internal struggle, debating whether he should wake up and how he should do so. Should he slightly tremble his fingers and let out a soft moan, or suddenly open his eyes with a furrowed brow?
“Captain Jiang Huan…” The newcomer crouched down, seemingly intending to poke the sleeping bag with her finger. However, before she could do so, Jiang Huan carefully and quietly unzipped the bag, shooting an annoyed glance at the woman named Xu Honglin, as if to ask what she wanted.
Shen Shanwu felt it was time to wake up, so he pretended to be groggily roused from sleep, half-opening his eyes and nuzzling into Jiang Huan’s arms. Jiang Huan looked down and gently stroked his back, softly saying, “It’s still early; just go back to sleep.”
After saying that, Jiang Huan raised his gaze to the on-duty vice captain, who sat up from his sleeping bag with a bewildered expression. The two then turned their attention to Xu Honglin. In the dim light of the small night lamp, the woman gracefully knelt down, tucking her long hair behind her ear. She leaned in to whisper to Jiang Huan but was pushed away with distaste.
Xu Honglin, unfazed, replied with a gentle smile, “Captain Jiang, I have something on my mind and can’t sleep… Would you keep me company and talk for a while?”
“…”
Shen Shanwu couldn’t help but open his eyes again, this time wide as saucers, with ears perked up like antennas, eager to catch the gossip. He had been curious about Jiang Huan’s romantic history during the day, and now, unexpectedly, some love interest had come knocking at night.
Jiang Huan furrowed his brows in disgust and said coldly, “Have some self-respect.”
“Captain Jiang~” The woman, daring to make a night assault, clearly had a thick skin. Perhaps adhering to the belief that no man could resist temptation, she called out “Captain Jiang” in a voice that lingered like an echo. “I’ve admired you for a long time. I’ve heard of your reputation, and seeing you today, you truly are strikingly handsome. I’m infatuated at first sight! Can’t you be a little warmer to me?”
Shen Shanwu clutched at Jiang Huan’s collar, feeling goosebumps prickling all over him. He believed that Jiang Huan would absolutely not like this type of attention, but after waiting for a long time, he still hadn’t heard any words of rejection.
No way… Shen Shanwu raised his head in sheer panic, only to see that Jiang Huan’s expression was far from right. It was a mix of disgust and fear in his eyes. Unable to help himself, he propped himself up in Jiang Huan’s embrace and asked, “Captain…?”
Jiang Huan finally reacted to the call, covering his mouth and dry-heaving, pushing Shen Shanwu away with restrained force. Just as he stood up, he bent down in pain, gagging again.
The vice captain hurried over to support Jiang Huan, while Xu Honglin’s face turned utterly pale. Jiang Huan’s reaction was a far more brutal blow than any words of rejection could have been.
The words “no” or “go away” could still be interpreted as a coy refusal, haughty and proud, but the repeated sounds of retching… could only mean one thing: You make me so sick I’m about to vomit.
The commotion drew the attention of the other members of the Shanhai Unit, who gradually opened their sleeping bags and sat up. It was clear that this wasn’t the first time Jiang Huan had reacted this way, and everyone quickly grasped the situation with a glance. Wu Fengge and Zhong Yin immediately put on serious expressions, rolling up their sleeping bags and forcibly trying to pull Xu Honglin out to sleep in a different area.
Xu Honglin, embarrassed and furious, struggled to resist, saying, “What are you doing? I’m tired! I want to go back to sleep. It’s not safe outside; I promise I’ll sleep until dawn, okay?”
“Captain wants to throw up just looking at you. I suggest you know your place,” Zhong Yin said, locking an arm around Xu Honglin’s and brutally escorting her away.
Zhang Xiaowen took a towel and some clean water, carefully handing them to the vice captain, who then passed them to Jiang Huan. Shen Shanwu seized the opportunity to dash over to Yao Wuque and asked, “What’s going on?”
Yao Wuque glanced around and sighed, leaning in to whisper to Shen Shanwu, “This is why you’ll never have a foster figure, Ah Tong. The captain has a psychological issue, and we’ve named this condition: affection repulsion syndrome.”
“Ha?”
“The captain hates it when someone likes him or admires him. The moment he hears a confession, he feels sick and wants to throw up. It’s not just a figure of speech; he really does throw up.”
“…Huh??” Shen Shanwu looked completely bewildered. How did he not know that Jiang Huan had this issue? When he was following him back then, there were no problems at all. How had four years passed and now he seemed to have so many issues?
“Zhong Yin has a sister named Zhong Yun. She’s beautiful, has a sweet voice, and is well-endowed… but most importantly, she’s very capable. She was originally ranked higher and was supposed to join the Shanhai team. But on the day of the selection, the girl suddenly confessed to Captain Jiang, saying she had liked him for a long time and hoped he would consider her. She also said that it was fine if he rejected her; she would continue to silently love him and wouldn’t let it interfere with her work.”
“The result? The captain didn’t even hear her finish her words and lost composure, running straight to the bathroom to throw up.”
Shen Shanwu could imagine how awkward that scene must have been; the girl must have been pretty resilient not to break down and cry.
“After that, the captain couldn’t help but feel disgusted whenever he saw Zhong Yun. Since the team couldn’t just swap out the captain, they replaced Zhong Yun with Zhong Yin, who ranked second overall. The captain felt guilty about it, so he personally contacted the second-ranked team on the coast and sent Zhong Yun there. Of course, I seriously suspect that a major factor in that decision was how far the second team’s office is from our team’s administration.”
“Oh, and after word got out about the captain’s psychological issues, there was some guy who, I don’t know how his brain works, thought that if he couldn’t be a lover, he could be a friend with benefits. He fantasized about having a no-strings-attached arrangement, thinking that it would lead to some dramatic plot where he’d chase the captain after sleeping together without saying ‘I love you’—and he actually climbed into the captain’s bed in the middle of the night…”
Shen Shanwu: “…I think I can imagine how that ended.”
“The captain kicked him hard and broke three of his ribs. Of course, later on, our Shanhai Unit paid the medical expenses and took strict action against the guard who let him in for trespassing.”
“…” Shen Shanwu clenched his fist, resting it under his lips, and pondered, “Why don’t we take the captain to see a psychologist? Don’t tell me that in such a large coastal base, there isn’t even one psychologist available.”
“The captain refuses,” Yao Wuque sighed again. “He says he understands the cause of his mental issues very well and doesn’t want to treat it. He just wants to leave it as it is.”
“…Huh???” Shen Shanwu showed an expression of incredulity for the third time, thinking that today really was a day full of questions for a kid…
After Yao Wuque finished explaining, Jiang Huan had just about wrapped up his own ordeal. Shen Shanwu quickly put on his shoes and ran back. Jiang Huan looked a bit sluggish, but upon seeing Jiang Tong’s concerned gaze, he forced a gentle smile and ruffled his hair, asking, “Did I scare you?”
The author has something to say:
Let me clarify the timeline:
- First Year of the Apocalypse: 35 is a freshman, 19 years old.
- Third Year of the Apocalypse: 35 suffers betrayal.
- Second Half of the Fourth Year of the Apocalypse: The two meet; at this time, 35 is 23 years old and Huan is 13 years old (there was a typo in a previous chapter, which has been corrected).
- Fifth Year of the Apocalypse: The Saint and Harmony Hospital tragedy occurs, so it’s not that 35 suffers. He’s already had it pretty tough; he can’t be the one to face every bad thing in the world.
- Eleventh Year of the Apocalypse: 35 is 31 years old, and Huan is 21 years old.
