Another week passed, and I kept volunteering with Mai.
Maybe it was because I’d heard Kazuki’s story—the part about how he wanted to do good deeds but couldn’t—that my motivation had gotten a slight boost. On Saturday, I visited Kazuki in the hospital as I’d promised. Since I hadn’t seen any games in his room last time, I brought a deck of cards, and the three of us—Kazuki, Mai, and I—played a bunch of card games.
On Monday morning, I spoke to Shoko on the train to school. Mai had actually suggested a while back that I invite Shoko to join us in volunteering. Apparently, Shoko had been asking Mai to recommend any good volunteer work since she wanted to earn points as well, and Mai, being as earnest as ever, remembered it clearly.
But I’d been avoiding that suggestion. Just the thought of Shoko—the one who always scoffs at my “hypocritical” views—seeing me fully engaged in volunteer work was… off-putting. She’d probably tease me about it until the semester ended.
But with Mai’s persistence, I eventually agreed to ask her.
“No thanks, I’ll pass,” Shoko said, surprisingly rejecting the invite.
“I’m not rude enough to butt into your little love affair,” she added, smirking.
“There it is again. I told you, it’s not like that, you lovesick idiot.”
Convinced that I was dating Mai, Shoko refused to believe otherwise, no matter what I said.
“Even if you aren’t dating, you’ve changed a bit, you know. It’s probably thanks to her, right?”
“…Maybe.”
“To think Yuichi of all people would be volunteering! And, what’s more, you’ve been at it for three weeks now?”
“I might just surpass you at this rate.”
“Don’t flatter yourself. Three weeks of volunteering barely adds up to 100 points.”
With four days of volunteering a week, that’s about twelve sessions in three weeks. If each time gets around five points, then sixty, maybe sixty-five points at most. …I’d thought I’d been working pretty hard these last three weeks, but it still barely made a dent. Hearing that Kazuki had only fifty points left to reach heaven had felt like a light in the darkness, but now I realized how much longer the road really was.
“I used to think that whole ‘human level’ thing was a joke, but seeing Shoko’s dedication firsthand has made me realize how amazing you actually are.”
“Well… yeah, of course,” she said, turning her face away, as if trying to hide it.
“Then again, Mai’s twice as impressive as you.”
“Uh-huh, proud husband, got it.”
“Who’s her husband?”
“Look, here comes your ‘wife’ now.”
The train reached our station, and Mai got on. I nudged Shoko, who was smirking at me, and made space for Mai to sit down.
“Yuichi-oniichan, are you dating Mai-oneechan?”
Kazuki had just won at Old Maid, expertly avoiding my joker card, and asked this out of the blue.
“…Kazuki, not you too.”
“Is he your boyfriend?”
“No, he’s just a friend.”
I shuffled the cards, glancing around to make sure no one was listening. Mai had gone to get some drinks, so it was just me and Kazuki in the room.
“But Oneechan always talks about you.”
“Lately, we’ve been spending a lot of time together. I guess that gives her stuff to talk about.”
“Then he is your boyfriend!”
“Kids these days grow up so fast.”
I laughed lightly as I dealt the cards.
“Lately, Oneechan’s been laughing so much. It’s because Onii-chan’s her boyfriend, right?”
“Was she not laughing before?”
“Yeah. When she’d come here before, she always looked so sad. But now she looks really happy.”
“That’s probably because your illness is getting better.”
I held my cards up high, pretending not to notice Kazuki’s gaze as I lied.
“Is my illness really getting better?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh… that’s good. I thought it was just getting worse.”
“…Why?”
“Because I’m always in pain, my chest aches… I thought I was going to die soon.”
“…”
I hated myself for not being able to tell him he was wrong. It took me forever to pick out pairs from my hand, just to keep my emotions hidden.
“…Are you scared of dying?”
Even though I didn’t need to ask, I did anyway.
“Yeah. Because if I die, I won’t see Dad, Mom, Oneechan, or Onii-chan anymore.”
“You’ll see them in heaven.”
I took a card from Kazuki’s hand and said this, but he didn’t take a card from mine. Instead, he quietly shook his head.
“But if I die, I’ll go to hell, right? Everyone else will be in heaven, so I won’t be able to see them.”
“Why would you say that? You’ll go to heaven, too.”
I tried to sound firm, but I was shaken. Seeing a child this small talk about going to hell, as if he’d accepted it… I could barely face him.
“But I don’t have enough points.”
“Then we’ll just have to earn more.”
Unable to sit still, I tossed my cards onto the table and stood up.
“Kazuki, let’s do something else, not just card games. Something good… something that will earn points.”
It’s only fifty points. If someone like me could earn that much in less than three weeks, then there’s no way Mai’s little brother can’t do the same.
Since the day I first came here, I’d been racking my brain for things hospitalized kids could do to earn points. But I hadn’t thought of anything good. Blood donations were out, as the doctor had advised against it. And as for simple jobs, I’d looked, but most required formal employment.
Doing something that benefits others but also gets counted as work reduces the points you receive. I still didn’t understand how points were awarded, but I was at a dead end.
“I want to play cards,” Kazuki said.
“Cards… next time. Right now, we should—”
I struggled to find the words to finish my sentence. Why was my brain so lacking in ideas?
“Please, Onii-chan, let’s play Old Maid.”
“Right now, think about earning points, not games.”
“Why? My illness is getting better, right?”
“…”
That one line left me with no response.
“Yeah… you’re right.”
I let out a sigh, sat back down, and gathered the cards I’d left on the table. Kazuki beamed as he plucked a card from my hand and discarded a pair.
“Sorry for the wait! They were out of Kazuki’s favorite juice,” Mai said, returning with three cans of juice.
“What’s wrong, Yuichi-san?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well… you looked really down.”
“Oh… I just drew the joker, that’s all.”
“You… sure take this seriously,” she said, surprised.
“Hey, Oneechan, are you really not dating Onii-chan?”
“E-Eh!? K-Kazuki, w-whaaat!?”
Flustered, Mai almost dropped her can, while Kazuki laughed, gleefully pulling a card from my hand.
“Done! I win!”
“Hey, Mai, let’s play Old Maid. This kid’s too strong; I can’t beat him.”
I’d lost four times in a row. Seriously, what’s up with that?
“Onii-chan’s face gives him away every time, so he’s weak,” Kazuki laughed.
“Come on, Mai, let’s play. I think I can win against you,” I challenged her.
“What’s that supposed to mean?!”
“Thank you so much for visiting so often,” Mai said to me on the train ride home.
“I wanted to come in the first place, so don’t worry about it.”
“Kazuki seems to really like you, Yuichi-san.”
“He’s a good kid…”
…There’s no way a kid like him deserves to go to hell.
Even if God allows it, I won’t.
“I’ll keep thinking. There must be something Kazuki can do. There has to be.”
“…Honestly, I’d be happy if he could just talk to you like today.”
“You mean… you want him to spend his remaining time on things that don’t earn points?”
“…Yes.”
Her response was agonizingly honest. I understood how hard it was for her to say it.
“Does that make me a terrible sister? My brother is on the brink of… of going to hell, and here I am…”
“No. Actually, I feel the same way.”
Mai looked at me, surprised.
“If I’m being honest, I’d rather Kazuki’s remaining time isn’t spent on gathering points but on making happy memories instead.”
“Yuichi-san…”
“But I also don’t want him to go to hell. So, while I can’t deny what Masaya-san is trying to do, I want to be the one to bring him joy in a different way.”
That was my honest feeling.
Working hard to ensure his son goes to heaven is probably the most natural thing a parent can do. But if that means filling his final moments with chores… that can’t be right.
For the time he has left, I want Kazuki’s life to be something more precious—family moments, irreplaceable memories. Not a countdown to earn points, but a time to cherish farewells.
“Yuichi-kun, any tips on how to make kids happy? Are you thinking of volunteering at a kindergarten or something?”
I asked Shoko for advice during break, and she raised an eyebrow, half impressed, half teasing.
“No, it’s about Mai’s little brother. He’s in the hospital, and I go visit him sometimes.”
“Oh wow, already at the family-involvement stage, huh?”
Seriously, this girl never lets up.
“You ever volunteer with kids?”
“Yeah, I worked part-time at an orphanage. It wasn’t bad, and I got more points than I expected.”
“I don’t care about the points. What kind of things did you do?”
“Nothing special—just played with the kids, helped with cleaning and cooking… pretty standard stuff. I doubt it’ll help you much.”
“Hmm… okay.”
Then, like it was no big deal, Shoko mentioned something interesting.
