Title: 不正经关系 (Improper Relationship)
Author：御小凡 (Yu Xiaofan)
Translator: K (@kin0monogatari)
Protagonists ：严海安 (Yan Hai’an – MC), 孙言 (Sun Yan – ML)
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Mo Yisheng looked at the drawing board intently and Yan Hai’an walked behind him: “Are you done?”
The picture is a day-to-day scene. One person is sitting at the dining table and eating. The light is coming in from outside. It is almost night time. The light is dim, making the tone of the whole painting heavy. The protagonist in the painting is He Ling. Compared with the real him, there is a hint of indifference and arrogance between his brows. He thoughtfully put his hand on the knife, but did not pick it up. It makes people feel nervous about what he’ll do.
This painting is quite different from Mo Yisheng’s previous style. It is full of disturbing hints, but it is even more intense.
Originally, Mo Yisheng insisted on painting Yan Hai’an, but Yan Haian really didn’t want to be a model for Mo Yisheng. And he still refused after being asked for a long time.
This made Mo Yisheng very sad, ignoring Yan Hai’an for more time than ever before. Yan Hai’an also didn’t know how to coax Mo Yisheng for the first time. Because this time, he was not thinking about Mo Yisheng. He was thinking of Sun Yan.
Sun Yan had always been sensitive to Mo Yisheng. And if Yan Hai’an appeared in his artwork again, he would have to make trouble with him again. In addition, Yan Hai’an has no time to model for it. He also has something to paint.
It was this long cold war that dimmed something important between Mo Yisheng and Yan Hai’an.
“Well, it can be varnished after it has dried.” Mo Yisheng seemed to have exhausted his strength and he was a little weak when he spoke. His eyes swept across every texture on the drawing board. A strange melancholy and doubt appeared on his face.
Yan Hai’an put his hand on his shoulder: “After painting, you should rest for a while.”
Mo Yisheng didn’t have much reaction. He simply ‘hummed’. It was very perfunctory. It was quite like he didn’t take what he had said to heart.
Yan Hai’an has to admit that since he and Sun Yan began to fall in love, he and Mo Yisheng have lost a close relationship. Perhaps it is gratitude, appreciation, or even a precious understanding, which makes the relationship between them more than ordinary. But their friendship is special.
But no matter what it was, they were gradually estranged from their respective choices. They are no longer as pure and agitated as before. Yan Hai’an did it on purpose, while Mo Yisheng reacted to his actions unconsciously.
However, it was unknown if Mo Yisheng was used to relying on others that he always looked for sustenance without gossip. After Yan Hai’an pulled away, he naturally became closer to He Ling.
Yan Hai’an has said several times about this. He has always had a bad impression of He Ling. during his frequent contact, he always feels that this person is too greasy and does not have the temperament of a painter. But Mo Yisheng’s reaction to this was getting bigger and bigger. One time he even said directly: “You can go take care of Sun Yan! Just leave me alone.”
The angry words of childish grievance left Yan Hai’an speechless.
There was a bit of embarrassment in the quietness in the air. This has never happened before. Yan Hai’an sighed silently: “I have one thing to apply to you. I want to ask for a period of time off.”
Mo Yisheng tilted his head but his eyes were still glued to the painting: “What are you going to do?”
Yan Hai’an said, “Sun Yan’s birthday is coming soon. So I agreed to go on a trip with him.”
“Oh… No wonder,” Mo Yisheng turned his head, “Do you wish to give that painting to him as a birthday present?”
At the other end of the studio there was also an easel with a painting on it, which had just been varnished and looked brand new. Yan Hai’an said uncomfortably, “Well, I don’t know what else to give…”
“Okay, you can go.” Mo Yisheng was still somewhat unhappy, “Have fun. But how long will you go?”
Speaking of this, Yan Hai’an was a little embarrassed. He said: “It may not be over even until the time for you to submit the application for the contest. But I will prepare all the materials and you can just submit them when the time comes.”
Mo Yisheng twisted around on the chair like a child who couldn’t get a Christmas present: “Don’t worry about this. He Ling and I have agreed that he will help me. You can go. It’s better to go early. I also want to travel on my birthday anyway.”
Yan Hai’an smiled: “Okay. You can go out and have a look and collect materials.”
“It’s boring to go alone.” Mo Yisheng glanced at Yan Hai’an and shook his head, “Forget it. I’ll ask He Ling if he’s free.”
He Ling.
Yan Hai’an frowned and said, “I’ll let Su Yin come over. He’s the most reassuring.”
“Don’t ask other people to come over. Don’t bother another person for others.” Mo Yisheng stretched, moved himself onto the sofa and narrowed his eyes comfortably, “That’s all. Remember to bring me a present.”
The size of the oil painting plus the frame is 46×38. This size is inconvenient to be brought to travel abroad, so Yan Hai’an had to hand it over to Sun Yan beforehand.
He has painted twice in his life as a gift. The wonderful thing is that both paintings were given to the same person.
Because he told Sun Yan in advance, Sun Yan went home early and asked eagerly, “Did you tell Mo Yisheng about tomorrow’s flight?”
“Uh, um.” Yan Hai’an sat on the sofa with the wrapped painting on his lap, “That…”
Sun Yan slumped beside him: “What is this?”
After speaking, he seemed to remember something. With a look of disgust: “Is this Mo Yisheng’s painting? Why did you bring it home?”
“It’s not. Take it apart and see.” Yan Hai’an handed it to him. Sun Yan furrowed his eyebrow and rudely tore open the protective paper outside: “Why are you eager about it so much?”
It is a painting of a person. The man is probably standing on the terrace. Behind him are the garden plants at night. The gauze curtain of the terrace is bundled aside. The lower part is slightly lifted by the wind, occupying the corner of the picture. The paint highlights the transparent effect of the cloth very well. Probably for this reason, the whole scene has a light and airy atmosphere, which makes the picture lively and poetic.
The protagonist in the painting is smoking, the corners of his mouth looked like he is smiling, or it could be just a small arc due to the cigarette. In any case, this softens his resolute face. His eyes looked to the lower left, which was an action representing trying to recall a memory.
Even an ordinary person can see the romance in the painting.
Yan Hai’an didn’t think too much about it when he painted it. But now that he re-examines it in the hands of the client, he suddenly feels very ashamed.
He suppressed the desire to escape and forced a calm and relaxed tone: “Your birthday present is inconvenient to take away, so I gave it to you in advance.”
Sun Yan had an excited expression on his face. He watched it for five minutes before turning his head in disbelief and asking, “Is it me?”
Don’t tell me… I feel even more ashamed, Yan Hai’an thought.
Yan Hai’an coughed twice but it was not enough. He coughed again: “Yes. I’m giving it to you.”
Sun Yan asked again, “Did you paint this?”
Without waiting for Yan Hai’an’s confirmation, he said to himself: “Yes, you painted it.”
Then he looked at the painting quietly, while Yan Hai’an nervously peeped at his profile.
He pulled the corners of his lips. It is the smile of a very satisfied man, but his brows were a little wrinkled. It was as if he was too happy that he didn’t know what to do: “It’s beautiful. I mean, you painted very well.”
The words were spoken quickly and smoothly, as if the words had naturally slipped from the tip of the tongue from his heart.
Yan Hai’an saw that there was a pleasant light in Sun Yan’s eyes. It made the pulse in his blood vessels finally slow down and it was no longer so fast that it made him uncomfortable: “Really, if you like it…”
Sun Yan turned his head abruptly. He asked curiously and expectantly, “Am I like this in your eyes?”
Painting is creation. It has great subjectivity. What the author sees and thinks will be displayed in every line. Under every light and shadow, there is nothing to hide.
Yan Hai’an felt embarrassed. He didn’t dare to look at Sun Yan, but wanted to look at him, so he had to focus on the painting.
Is this him in my eyes? He wondered.
Yan Hai’an didn’t copy Sun Yan’s sketches. He didn’t even have any photos. It all depended on memory. Even though he was very familiar with the outline of Sun Yan’s face, the characters in his paintings still changed to a certain extent compared with real people. It was more tender and softer. It is even full of love.
He hasn’t used his brush in a long time and his lines are not as familiar as he used to be. But his understanding and composition skills are far better than when he was in high school. This painting is much fuller than that tree, just like himself. He is not younger than then and it is not like that time. He is pure but time has made him mature.
When he was young, he was energetic. He had a five-point love to show off. He wished the whole world would know. But now, when there is so much love, it is necessary to hold it down in the bottom of his heart. He dares to tell no one about it and sometimes even to himself.
In the face of this painting, no amount of concealment can hide it. Because it is not so much that everything in the painting was captured by Yan Hai’an because of Sun Yan’s external expression. It is the feeling given to it.
Yan Hai’an was persuaded by the painting. He turned his head and looked at Sun Yan.
He felt his lips move, thinking that it was probably a smile: “Yes, this is you that I love.”
Sun Yan held the painting frame in one hand and did not respond verbally. Instead, he gently kissed him, softer than ever before. It was like a lion touching the blooming roses with his nose, bringing with him a gentle kiss with unspeakable love and pity.
They are like travellers who walk alone in the dark night. They are able to pass by countless amazing coincidences. When the pace is staggering, the lonely lights in their hands can only be reflected in the blink of an eye. And finally, they have such a mutual glance at each other when their lights meet.
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Next update: 2022.09.12
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*Translator’s Note: Ayyy this chapter is so full of sugar! I’m dying from diabetes. -K
