Chi Qiu looked puzzled and thought Ji Yanchen was talking nonsense: “What’s the matter? You two are both at this age, can you stop bantering like a child.”
Ji Yanchen was aggrieved in his heart, but he didn’t know how to say it.
Chi Qiu, after not being able to get an answer, picked up the cake box that they forgot on the table: “I forgot to put it in the fridge, I’m going to put it now.”
“Wait, this is what I packed back, I want to eat it all now.” When Ji Yanchen’s childishness came up, no one could stop it. Chi Qiu had to take out a piece from it and watched as Ji Yanchen swallowed it in a few bites.
Then, Ji Yanchen ate the second and third piece…
That stance, it seemed that he didn’t want to leave a piece to Lu Ming.
Chi Qiu poured him a glass of water, dumbfounded, but he didn’t really mind his behavior. Anyway, it was just a few pieces of cake. If Lu Ming wanted to eat it, he could just go to Bai Yan’s shop to buy it.
Now that his eyes were better, it was convenient for Chi Qiu to go anywhere. Therefore, Chi Qiu thoughtfully took out the fourth piece for Ji Yanchen and said in a good temper: “Eat slowly, don’t choke.”
“Can’t slow down!”
Chi Qiu listened and took the initiative to help him take out the fifth piece of cake.
“…” Ji Yanchen felt so greasy from the cream that he wanted to vomit. He thought Chi Qiu would stop him, but he didn’t expect that Chi Qiu would make it difficult for him.
Chi Qiu took out all the cakes and thoughtfully said, “Among the dishes Auntie Zhang prepared tonight, there are boiled pork slices and stirred noodles that you like. But you’re like this, you probably can’t eat dinner, so I’ll ask her not to prepare it, right?”
“…”
“Come on, eat all the cakes.” Chi Qiu smiled, “Don’t leave until you finish eating.”
“…”
A few minutes later, Ji Yanchen obediently packed up the remaining pieces of cake intact and personally delivered them to the fridge. He burped a full of creamy taste and almost vomited.
Sometimes, he himself couldn’t figure out why he was so childish? This kind of injury to the enemy was not enough, but he had eight thousand self-inflicted injuries. Why did he keep doing it?
In addition to being sad, Ji Yanchen couldn’t eat anymore. He drooped his head and rested on the sofa for a while before leaving.
Seeing this, Chi Qiu went to the kitchen and packed him slices of boiled meat and stirred noodles: “If the cake is not enough, you can eat these as a late night snack.”
Ji Yanchen reached out angrily and took the insulation box handed over by Chi Qiu. He raised his hand and said in a low voice, “Let’s go.”
Chi Qiu took him all the way to his garage and stopped him, “Yanchen.”
“What?”
Chi Qiu looked at him and said solemnly: “Thank you for helping me and taking care of me all these years. I am very happy that you came to our house to play that year and became friends with me.”
Ji Yanchen took a step, he didn’t expect Chi Qiu to say this. But he had thought before, if he hadn’t known Chi Qiu at the very first place, would Chi Qiu’s life not be so bumpy?
He had resented himself.
Now, Chi Qiu thanked him.
Ji Yanchen’s eyes were wet causing a fog. He clenched his back teeth and deliberately touched his arm, pretending to get goose bumps all over: “Damn, what are you doing? It’s like you’re going to die. Don’t say this, you know I don’t like it when you say thank you to me.”
Chi Qiu opened his mouth, but Ji Yanchen was afraid that he would say something touching again to make him cry, so quickly interrupted him: “I am your best friend, friends help each other, it should be.”
Chi Qiu could not help but smile, revealing a nice smile.
Ji Yanchen’s heart softened a lot, he glanced at the insulation box in his hand and said contentedly: “I’m going back, I’ll come back to play with you in a few days.” He sat on the driver’s seat. His mouth flooded with sweet creamy taste as he said, “It’s cold outside, you go inside!”
He closed the door.
Chi Qiu was still standing outside. Ji Yanchen touched his full stomach and could not help but smile as he suddenly relaxed. The tragedy that happened because of him back then seemed to have vanished.
Once night fell in winter, even the wind was harsh.
After seeing off Ji Yanchen, Chi Qiu went inside and closed the door. He let out a breath and rubbed his hands. Seeing it was almost time, he wanted to go to the kitchen to help Auntie Zhang serve the dishes.
Before he could take a few steps, Auntie Zhang, who was cooking in the kitchen, suddenly came out in a frenzy.
As if she didn’t have time to say anything, she trotted all the way to the study. Not only that, Auntie Zhang clutched a soup spoon in her hand, looking quite hurried.
When Chi Qiu saw it, he followed her over: “Auntie Zhang?”
Auntie Zhang didn’t even lift her head; one hand holding a soup spoon, one hand rummaging through Lu Ming’s drawer. She wiped the sweat on her forehead, looking at the piles and piles of documents in the drawer, anxiously saying: “Mr. Lu forgot to bring a document, ah…How do I understand these documents. Mr. Lu said he had asked his assistant to come and get it, but I can’t find it.”
“Did he tell you exactly where he put it?”
“He just said it’s in the bottom drawer of the bookcase and asked me to look for it. Is it a project file called ‘xxxx’?” Auntie Zhang’s head was so big; she only remembered the first few words of the document and she couldn’t find it.
Chi Qiu used to come to Lu Ming’s study when he had nothing to do, so he knew exactly where Lu Ming kept his documents.
Since his eyes were fine now and he didn’t have to pretend to be blind anymore, he naturally couldn’t be idle.
“Auntie Zhang, let me find it.”
Aunt Zhang stood in place feeling embarrassed. She was not good at ordering her boss, let alone a boss like Chi Qiu. Her attitude towards Chi Qiu was still the same as when he was blind and did not change.
“My eyes are fine.” Chi Qiu kindly reminded her. Auntie Zhang stood aside for a while. Seeing that she really couldn’t be of any use, she was embarrassed and said: “Sir…then I’ll go and serve the last dish, I’m really bothering you.”
“It’s okay, I’ll do these things in the future.”
Chi Qiu understood that Auntie Zhang was not good at this. He lowered his head and opened drawers one by one to rummage around. After opening three drawers in a row, he finally found the document in the last one.
Auntie Zhang, who was very handy, had already cleaned up the kitchen and returned to the study again: “Sir, Mr. Lu’s assistant has arrived.”
“I’ve found it, too.” Chi Qiu handed the file to Aunt Zhang, “Go give it to him while I clean up.”
“Okay!”
The door of the study was closed by the wind when Auntie Zhang passed by. Chi Qiu carefully tidied up the papers that she had tossed around. It was at this time that the corner of Chi Qiu’s eyes swept to the drawer on the other side. That drawer should be used by Lu Ming often, it was accidentally left open, and in the gap, a corner of paper was stuck.
Chi Qiu crouched down and opened it, trying to sort things out, but unintentionally saw a pile of letters with the envelope torn open.
His eyelashes trembled; what he saw in his eyes was his name.
At the top of the envelope, the words ‘Chi Qiu (receiver)’ were written. Chi Qiu was stunned, he flicked his hand, and to his surprise, each of the following letters had the words ‘Chi Qiu (receiver)’ written.
He hurriedly took out this pile of letters, there were dozens of them.
The weight of each letter was so heavy, as if a stone fell into Chi Qiu’s palm.
That night, Chi Qiu couldn’t eat a single bite of the meal.
He sat in the study, with tears in his eyes as he read them one by one.
The night’s gentleness spreaded over the milky way, falling to where one could see; it became a starry sky, and tomorrow would be a clear day.
Lu Ming, who came home late, drove the car into the front yard of the villa. When he got out of the car, the oncoming wind was as cold as a knife. He glanced at the time, one in the morning.
Chi Qiu should have fallen asleep.
Lu Ming was cold. Even if he missed Chi Qiu again, he was reluctant to disturb Chi Qiu’s good night’s dream. He tiptoed through the door and went straight into the guest bedroom where he would sleep for a while. He was afraid of waking Chi Qiu up, so he didn’t plan to go to the master bedroom to rest tonight.
He turned on the light but the guest bedroom wasn’t as cold as he thought it would be. He mistakenly thought that Auntie Zhang was careless and did not turn off the heating in this guest bedroom, so he did not pay much attention to anything.
Until he saw a ‘thing’ bulging on the bed in front of him.
“…”
Lu Ming’s heart was startled. He quickly walked up and saw Chi Qiu shrinking under the covers. Chi Qiu’s eyelashes were still stained with tears and the corners of his eyes were slightly red, so it was obvious that he fell asleep after crying for a long time.
Lu Ming felt distressed immediately and couldn’t help frowning, wanting to wake Chi Qiu up and ask. But looking at Chi Qiu’s face who was sleeping well, Lu Ming retracted his hand and squeezed his palm tightly.
He did not know what had happened to Chi Qiu, so he began to blame himself; blaming himself for not arranging his work properly and and blaming himself for failing to accompany Chi Qiu to the hospital.
He was afraid that the result of Chi Qiu’s checkup was not good, making him tired and drowsy.
“Hmm.”
Just when Lu Ming’s thoughts were confused, Chi Qiu was awakened a little by the bright light of the lamp. Lu Ming suddenly stepped back to turn off the light. In the warmth of the air, Lu Ming’s hands and feet warmed up, but still did not dare to touch Chi Qiu
It was Chi Qiu’s raspy voice that called him over: “Lu Ming?”
In the guest bedroom without lights on, Chi Qiu’s voice was very soft, his crying voice lingered for a long time. Chi Qiu sat up and helplessly called him again, “Lu Ming.”
Lu Ming didn’t care about anything else, he stepped forward and hugged Chi Qiu into his arms. His tone was gentle, like the falling stars of many nights: “Why are you crying?” His fingers brushed the warm corners of Chi Qiu’s eyes, and between light touches, Lu Ming dropped a kiss, “Why are you crying? Are you uncomfortable somewhere? Or…”
Or the medical checkup result was not good?
When Chi Qiu heard Lu Ming’s voice, all of a sudden his nose turned sour and his tears rubbed off onto Lu Ming’s suit. His head was pressed against Lu Ming’s chest, sniffling and sobbing like a child.
“Lu Ming, Lu Ming…” Chi Qiu called him over and over again, calling out to him as if they were reunited after a long time.
“It’s okay, it’s okay.” Lu Ming touched Chi Qiu’s head, “Chi Qiu, I told you, no matter what, I will stay with you.”
When Chi Qiu heard this, he burst into tears.
Lu Ming could not break away to turn on the light. So, he simply leaned on the bed, hugged Chi Qiu tightly in his arms and let Chi Qiu pillow his arms, embracing each other in the soft quilt: “Don’t cry, be good. If you keep crying, your eyes will be swollen tomorrow. I…I’m not going to work tomorrow, I’ll take you out for a walk, let’s go for a walk. Or do you want to go somewhere to play, or what do you want to do?”
Lu Ming began to use his own chattering approach to coax Chi Qiu.
Now, as long as Chi Qiu said a word and stopped crying, even if he wanted the stars in the sky, Lu Ming had to find a way to pick them. If he couldn’t pick the stars, just draw one in his heart and give it to Chi Qiu sincerely, so that Chi Qiu could hold it in the palm of his hand and touch it.
But Chi Qiu didn’t want anything.
What he wanted, what he wanted most, was already in front of him.
Chi Qiu’s lower lip rubbed hard against Lu Ming’s arms, biting Lu Ming’s chin, leaving a tooth mark. He came out with tears, anger, and a lot of grievances.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“What?” Lu Ming’s chin was aching, but he didn’t dare to touch it.
Chi Qiu shed tears, the salty liquid was bitter in the mouth, after emotional tossing, there was only distress: “I’ve always thought that you forgot me so easily, I’ve always misunderstood you, didn’t understand you, thought that your liking must be much less than my liking for you…why didn’t you tell me?”
Lu Ming’s hands froze.
Chi Qiu whimpered: “I know about those letters, you wrote them to me…Why, why didn’t you send them to me? If I don’t know, are you going to lie to me for the rest of my life? Why, Lu Ming?”
He had too many why, could Lu Ming answer it all?
“…”
“You wrote ‘Chi Qiu receiver’, but did Chi Qiu receive it?” Chi Qiu touched the teeth marks on Lu Ming’s chin and suddenly regretted his force. He kissed Lu Ming and his tears rubbed Lu Ming’s face: “You were a full decade late to ‘send’ the letter to me, and you didn’t send them willingly.”
The more he thought about it, the angrier he became and started to scold Lu Ming: “You big liar, big bastard! You promised to come back to me but you didn’t, you wrote me a letter but you didn’t send it to me! But you’re sick, I shouldn’t have cursed you, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”
It was not some goddamn apathy, it was a heart disease with a bloody wound in it. Lu Ming sewed it up and cracked it, and endured the pain when it cracked.
Step by step, he pushed Lu Ming to become sick.
“Lu Ming, you were sick…you were sick, do you know that?” Chi Qiu cried, his heart felt as if it was being pinched and swollen, then tightened: “You have suffered so much alone. You didn’t tell me anything, so I couldn’t help you. You’re stupid, really stupid…”
Lu Ming’s throat was dry, his adam’s apple was like a blunt instrument fixed in one place.
He actually couldn’t make a sound.
“…”
Words had become the most useless thing; every sentence was an excuse, and an ego. He understood what Chi Qiu wanted, but he could never say it himself, just like those letters that could never be sent.
“Chi Qiu.”
He listened to Chi Qiu crying so hard that it made him distressed.
Chi Qiu closed his eyes as he hugged Lu Ming tightly and pressed against the crook of his neck, eager for Lu Ming to say a word.
After a long time, Lu Ming touched Chi Qiu’s head and finally said in a deep voice: “I don’t want to share the pain with you, I want to return the spring to you.”
As Lu Ming wrote in his letter back then: you are the most beautiful sun in spring, I hope that happiness will always belong to you forever.
And Lu Ming’s own wish was very simple: he just wanted a hug from Chi Qiu, just like now.
