Chapter 7: “What am I doing……”
“Sorry, I didn’t hear.”
“I won’t repeat this the third time, okay? That…… I’m talking about whether that person called Mutsuki-san is the person you like.”
“……Yeah. That’s right.”
I couldn’t see Mizuno-san’s expression because she was following me from behind.
I couldn’t turn around while doing my piggyback on the stairs, so I carefully climbed the stairs one step at a time.
“What’s so good her? Which part of her do you like?”
“If I had to say so, it would be love at first sight.”
“…The simplest and most persuasive word for falling in love… Love at first sight… I guess. You can fall in love even though you don’t understand each other… It’s convenient, isn’t it?
“Mi, Mizuno-san?”
Mizuno-san’s voice sounded like she was in a state of depression.
“It’s fine. Please continue.”
For a moment, I was about to ask her what I should continue, but I realized that she was asking about the situation of my love at first sight, so I continued to talk.
“The first time I saw Mutsuki-san was at the entrance ceremony. I was genuinely excited when I saw her dignified figure greeting us as the representative of the new students. I had never even talked to her before, but she just came into my line of sight. I can’t help but feel my heart throbbing. From the sidelines, though, I look nothing but a stalker.”
All I could do was laugh at my emptiness.
One of the reasons why they couldn’t have a conversation was because we were in different classes, but even if we were in the same class, I don’t know if I would have been able to talk to her properly. It might be better not to be incoherent and give a bad impression.
“That’s why, at Masaomi’s request, I asked Mutsuki-san directly, ‘What do you think of Toujou Masaomi?'”
“Eh……”
Mizuno reacts to Kana’s intrusion.
“That’s how you asked her!?”
Kazuki turned around at my loud voice, but he seemed to sense it and started climbing the stairs again.
“But Masaomi, didn’t you tell me “Please indirectly ask her if she knows me or not.”?”
“You missed the meaning of ‘indirectly’! Or rather, I can’t help thinking that you knew this was going to happen so you asked her in that way.”
I had the urge to throw Kana out here, but I couldn’t do it because of the stairs.
“”Toujou Masaomi? I don’t know him.””
Kana said, probably imitating Mutsuki.
I’ve never talked to Mutsuki-san, so I don’t know if the tone is right or wrong.
It also makes me feel the distance from her, and it becomes frustrating.
“Don’t say it… I’m holding it in pretty well.”
“Did Mutsuki-san really say that?”
“It looks like it, haha……”
It’s a dry laugh, even for me.
“But I can’t help it because I like her. It doesn’t matter who the other person is.”
Should I call it a faint hope? Even if Mutuki-san doesn’t like me, I must still like her.
In the unlikely event that Mutsuki-san falls in love with me, if I don’t have love for her, everything will be in vain.
……I’m feeling utterly pathetic.
“Mutsuki-san is…… not that capable in my opinion. Other people say that she has a bad personality, domineering, arrogant, and has terrible relationships with men…… Also, that she’s just all face……”
“I don’t want Mizuno-san to say that. Even I am aware of those things without you putting it like that. However, just because of that, having the person I like being badmouthed in front of me…… is unforgivable.”
“Oh, Masaomi got mad.”
It’s also annoying to avoid Kana’s butting in.
“What’s wrong? The usual Mizuno-san is more――”
I tried my best to say it calmly.
“With my, what do you even understand about me……”
I couldn’t continue the second phrase.
“Even I have an ugly side. There are people I don’t like. There times when I just want to badmouth someone so bad that I can’t help myself! …… But, I can’t live if I don’t hide it, can I? I hide it so I don’t get disliked, I pretend, and now I’m finally where I am! That’s why, the me in school being the real me…… Please don’t say such a thing!”
I couldn’t help but turn around at the scream that echoed in the hallway on the third floor.
Mizuno-san supported herself with a crutch while crying big tears.
I was speechless.
I felt like I had touched something that I shouldn’t have.
I thoughtlessly stepped into a sensitive and vulnerable place that people usually hide.
Mizuno-san passed me, who stopped with Kana on my back, and chased after Kazuki. We’re almost at the Student Council room.
Even when Kazuki heard that loud voice, he didn’t turn around.
Without even waiting for me, he kept going ahead.
I wonder if that was Kazuki’s own intention. Or was he just disappointed in me?
“Masaomi, let’s go too.”
Kana urged me to move forward, as if nothing had happened.
The sight of Mizuno-san walking catches my eyes.
Walking with crutches requires more strength than you think. I was in front of Mizuno-san, so I didn’t realize it, but Mizuno-san was always working harder than anyone else, and she was following along. Although she was frustrated by her legs not moving as she wanted, she was desperately trying to walk.
“What am I doing…?”
It was self-deprecating.
