The message from Cheng Chen was like a reassurance pill. But also like a catalyst, which triggered Lu Zheyu’s thoughts, the kind of thoughts that he originally dared not have.
Lu Zheyu knew that he could not remain calm when facing what might happen in the future.
He and Cheng Chen maintained intermittent contact.
More than a month later, he went to A City to participate in a mathematics competition. Shao Ming, who originally did not intend to participate, changed his mind temporarily and joined the competition team in E City in order to find someone.
That someone was Zhu Tong, who was injured in order to save Shao Ming. The sickly boy was asked by his family to return to A City for a medical examination, so Shao Ming also went to A City.
He thought he would give Zhu Tong a pleasant surprise; but it turned out, it was Shao Ming who was given quite a shock.
Shao Ming got Zhu Tong’s medical records from somewhere, and was hit hard. Lu Zheyu accompanied him to a bar to drink.
In the bar, Shao Ming asked him a question.
“If you like someone you are destined to never be with, what will you do?”
His answer is: give up.
—If he was destined to not be with that person, there was no reason to stubbornly persist.
However, it was a sentiment that was easy to say, but hard to do.
Later, he received a text message from Cheng Chen, which was not good news.
Cheng Chen told him: [Zhu Tong fainted and was hospitalized.]
Zhu Tong was not someone he was close with, but he was still a good classmate for more than two months. He knew the purpose of Cheng Chen telling him this news was to inform Shao Ming, so he didn’t hesitate to pass it along.
The two hurriedly left the bar.
Compared with Shao Ming’s anxiety, Lu Zheyu, in the intervals of worrying about Zhu Tong, could not help but think: ‘Zhu Tong fainted, why did Cheng Chen know about it in the first place? Why did he tell Shao Ming about Zhu Tong’s fainting?’
Why did Cheng Chen care about Zhu Tong so much?
Lu Zheyu then immediately remembered Cheng Chen’s mention of his “male cousin with poor health”.
The world was quite small indeed, some things were just so very coincidental.
The same identity gap, the same age limit, but Shao Ming is different from him.
Shao Ming didn’t have parents who were out to get him, and Cheng Chen wasn’t as carefree as Zhu Tong. (T/L: I laughed at this, ngl)
Seeing the rumors about Cheng Chen and his “flings”, Lu Zheyu’s thinking is no longer rational.
He knew that Cheng Chen meeting people and attending banquets was a normal thing – he needed to get connections and socialize as a businessman. But still, he irrationally felt jealous of those who can appear in the same frame as Cheng Chen.
If he hadn’t met Cheng Chen at such a sensitive age, even if it was a year or two later…
If he could grow up quickly, he could have a suitable and legitimate identity and stand shoulder to shoulder with Cheng Chen.
If he could be better, be able to afford a future with the two of them, together… If he was rich enough to hide the person he likes from the hungry public’s eyes…
When he thought of Cheng Chen, Lu Zheyu kept having some unrealistic fantasies.
He worked hard to study, make money, and distract himself.
Cheng Chen sent him messages every now and then.
<Young Master Cheng Loves Playing the Fool>: I heard that you won the second prize in the math competition, congratulations.
<Young Master Cheng Loves Playing the Fool>: Working with your classmates during the winter vacation, eh? What happened to being the lone wolf?
<Young Master Cheng Loves Playing the Fool>: Are you going home for the New Year? Where do you live?
<Young Master Cheng Loves Playing the Fool>: You can stay with your classmates, but you have to be aware that you are not single.
Lu Zheyu: “…”
Lu Zheyu occasionally replied to messages sent by Cheng Chen.
These were Cheng Chen’s care and reminders in the form of texts. And these constant reminders did make him feel safe.
BUt sometimes, he didn’t reply.
Every time he saw a new scandal, he would deliberately ignore the messages from Cheng Chen.
The thing is, Lu Zheyu was even more afraid that if he replied, he wouldn’t be able to hide his morbid jealousy. He would keep asking, doubting, leading his imagination wild. Or worse, he might even cross the line and directly interfere.
He did not want to show his pettiness and distrust in front of Cheng Chen.
He was afraid that he would be as unreasonable as his parents and become the kind of person he hated the most.
Cheng Chen was busy with his own things every day, and he started bombarding with text messages in his spare time.
It was normal for Lu Zheyu not to reply to messages before, but he did not think it was a big deal because they could meet. After they separated, every time he didn’t get a reply, his expectation was dashed. In his gloomy mind, he could not help but question himself: ‘Why did I like such a cold-tempered person? It was simply asking for trouble!’
He could only comfort himself that Lu Zheyu was a self-reliant high school student who was too busy to pay attention to him.
He asked people to pay attention to Lu Zheyu’s movements. After knowing that Zhu Tong and Lu Zheyu were in the same class and often went to the same milk tea shop, he was pleasantly surprised that two troublesome kids he secretly spied on were actually in the same place.
The more information he knew, the less complaints he had. But also, somehow, his distress grew.
He gradually became dissatisfied with just being able to communicate through the screen and through the news he received.
He wanted to call Lu Zheyu and meet him, but he was afraid that after meeting him, he would spiral out of control – he might even straight-up keep Lu Zheyu physically by his side.
After entering the third year of high school, Lu Zheyu finally was no longer underaged. He could do more things.
He worked with Zhu Tong’s boyfriend, but Cheng Chen didn’t know what he was doing every day. The newly-grown adult was so busy that he had no time to reply to his messages less and less.
Without other ideas, Cheng Chen could only go to Zhu Tong’s house under the pretext of looking for his cousin.
Lu Zheyu was not surprised. He didn’t deliberately distance himself, nor was he extra intimate.
—People like Lu Zheyu probably don’t know how to write the word “intimate”.
Cheng Chen was concerned about the “agreement” between the two and didn’t dare to go too far. But, when he saw other people talking to Lu Zheyu familiarly and putting their arms around him, Cheng Chen was consumed by jealousy.
He knew the people around Zhu Tong, so he recognized Luo Suo.
But he didn’t understand why a person who was very discerning in front of Zhu Tong and others seemed like a fool in front of him.
As for Luo Suo, he also didn’t understand. Zhu Tong always said that his cousin was a very easy-going person, but there were several times when he felt that he was glared at by Cheng Chen, who looked like he had personal vendetta against Luo Suo.
‘Maybe this was the majesty of a superior man.’ Luo Suo rationalized.
He thought Cheng Chen came to find Zhu Tong. He was being tactful and pulled Lu Lao’er to “avoid suspicion” together.
As a result, every time they met, Cheng Chen’s dislike only grew.
For a long time, Luo Suo was still quite afraid of this Cheng-zong.
Because he couldn’t be open and aboveboard, Cheng Chen always felt dissatisfied. It only made him even more reasonable, even if he was faced with a high-school kid.
Lu Zheyu didn’t reply to his message, but he agreed to have dinner with other people!
In the past, Cheng Chen had to use his utmost persuasion skill to coax Lu Zheyu into agreeing to go together. But now, with just one measly phone call, Lu Zheyu readily agrees to go to someone’s house during the holiday.
Cheng-zong will never forget this. A sense of crisis arose in his heart.
One day, Cheng Chen and Lu Zheyu agreed to meet. But just before the agreed time came, Lu Zheyu suddenly said that he can’t go.
Cheng Chen, out of impulse, asked about Lu Zheyu’s whereabouts and drove over there without thinking, and was confused by his own self, not knowing what the hell was wrong with him.
But when he arrived, Lu Zheyu ignored him. The young man even turned around and left after seeing him.
Remembering what Luo Suo said to him before about Lu Zheyu’s finicky family, Cheng Chen was worried that something had happened to them, so he followed after him.
Lu Zheyu was driving very slowly, so it wasn’t hard for Cheng Chen to catch up with the young man riding an electric scooter in the middle of the night.
Cheng Chen overtook the electric scooter and blocked its path. He slid down the window, and said to the young man on the side of the road: “Get in the car.”
“…”
Lu Zheyu seemed to be very confident in the public security of Gongshui County. After a slight hesitation, he decisively abandoned his electric scooter, opened the door and got in the car.
He was so straightforward, and Cheng Chen felt a little relieved.
After both of them fastened their seat belts, he asked, “What happened at home?”
Lu Zheyu said, “My dad had a sudden heart attack, so he asked me to go back and see him.”
Cheng Chen turned his head in surprise, and before he had time to worry, he heard the young man add, “He’s faking it.”
The reason why he dared not to go home for two whole years was that he had a source of information in the village. His parents acted like a big shot in front of him, but they became much quieter after they could not see him. Although they scolded him badly on the phone, cried and threatened him, they did not do anything in the end. They were healthy and lived well.
He agreed to go back today not because he was worried about his parents, but because he had things to be solved.
In the second and third years of high school, his parents came to look for him because he did not go home. They made a scene in school, and after they found out about his jobs, they cut off their son’s living expenses. Not long after, they were accused and laughed at, and fled in panic afterwards.
This time, his father pretended to be sick and asked him to go back, probably because they knew his college entrance examination results were excellent – he managed to get into the stellar Q University. They wanted him to go back home so they could parade him off to relatives and friends.
Lu Zheyu took a deep breath and didn’t say much to Cheng Chen on the way back. He just looked out the window and pointed the way out at the right time.
The car finally stopped in front of a grassy path.
After getting out of the car, Cheng Chen looked at the dark road ahead. It was so dark that he couldn’t see the road. With a frown, he said, “Do you have to come back in the middle of the night?”
Lu Zheyu pointed in a direction and said, “There is a sand field dam in front of you. There, you can make a U-turn to go back…”
He wanted Cheng Chen to go back first, but he saw that the older man had closed the car door and locked the car.
Cheng Chen said calmly, “I’m here to see your parents, not to see you.”
Lu Zheyu: “…”
Cheng Chen took out his mobile phone and turned on the flashlight, walked to the path, and asked, “How do I get there?”
The path was neither wide nor narrow. Cars couldn’t pass through, and had to walk there. The road wasn’t paved, and was bumpy everywhere. On top of that, it rained two days ago, so it was extra slippery and muddy.
A certain Cheng-zong, who had never seen such a road in his life, didn’t know where to start.
Lu Zheyu looked at his back as he kept trying to move forward on the path, and felt his heart suddenly tremble, with an indescribable throbbing.
He took two steps forward, “Walk on the grassy side.”
Cheng Chen turned his head and looked at him, and finally took the initiative to step forward and stepped on the shallow grass beside the muddy road.
He stepped quite steadily.
Cheng Chen breathed a sigh of relief and walked forward slowly.
Lu Zheyu was familiar with the road and followed him and watched him.
After walking for a while, Cheng Chen thought he had found the trick. His tense body relaxed and he walked forward. He even had the mind to turn around and talk to Lu Zheyu, “By the way, your home…”
“Don’t look back, the road ahead is slippery…”
Before he finished speaking, he heard a scream from the person in front. Cheng Chen stepped on a stone, his feet slipped sideways, and his whole body fell forward.
Lu Zheyu quickly reached out and grabbed the older man.
Cheng Chen held his hand with great difficulty, thus avoiding the tragedy of rolling into the mud.
As soon as he stood firm, he immediately looked up. “You come to walk this road in the middle of the night, are you looking for death?”
Lu Zheyu was rarely stopped by his question, and said slowly, “I know the road well.”
Cheng Chen: “…”
‘Isn’t it two years since you last visited here, though?’
Just when he was about to snark something back, he suddenly realized something was wrong.
He looked down and saw that Lu Zheyu’s hand was on his waist, and the other hand was tightly holding his hand.
The skin-to-skin contact, somehow, felt extra nice. It’s been a long time since they had this kind of contact.
Once they felt it, they didn’t want to let go.
It was quite some time before Lu Zheyu broke the silence.e “I’ll go ahead.”
Cheng Chen stepped aside to let him go forward, and instead followed Lu Zheyu’s pace and was pulled forward by him.
Cheng Chen didn’t say anything. He only silently felt the warmth transmitted by the younger man’s palm.
Finally, after walking through the muddy path and arriving at Lu Zheyu’s house, Cheng Chen heard the conversation coming from the house.
“…Aren’t children meant to stay with you when you grow up? Zheyu is only in high school and he hasn’t been home to see you two for two years. If he goes to college, he probably won’t come back for the rest of his life.”
