[T/N: Warning, suicidal thought and attempt.]
Shen Yuhan, who didn’t know that Shan Qihuan was following him, was startled by the sudden light, he was trying to find the fruit knife, after rummaging through it for a long time, he didn’t know where the auntie had put the knife, the knife is sharp and easy to cut but not heavy.
At this moment, he was still holding a meat cleaver in his hand, and is borrowing the moonlight to hold the knife to his own wrist, wondering if he can cut through his skin, the knife can cut open a pig bone, so it could cut through his skin as well.
However, there is no way he would end his life in the kitchen, if he bleeds all over the kitchen here, Auntie Wang would not be able to clean the kitchen, Auntie Wang usually treats him quite well, and takes special care of his taste.
Just as he was thinking about where to end his life, unexpectedly, the lights came on.
Shan Qihuan was immediately frightened by Shen Yuhan who was holding a kitchen knife and was ready to stab himself!
He reacted quickly, stepped forward and grabbed the kitchen knife in Shen Yuhan’s hand, threw it on the countertop, and immediately carried him away from this dangerous place in the kitchen.
Shan Qihuan was angry and anxious: “Shen Yuhan, what are you doing in the kitchen with a kitchen knife?”
It only took a moment for Shen Yuhan’s feet to be lift off the ground and be carried away from the kitchen, when he reacted, he had already been placed on the dining table and sat on the chair by Shan Qihuan!
Shen Yuhan’s already red eyes turned even redder at his fierce eyes, and tears began to flow down.
Not even letting him die, it’s too much!
Shen Yuhan was so angry at Shan Qihuan just now, he began to speak recklessly1不管不顧 (bù guǎn bù gù): to not take care of; recklessly; disregard; regardless of; take no care of; imprudently., and while crying, he said: “What do you care about what I do?”
Shen Yuhan thinks that he is very fierce now, but in Shan Qihuan’s eyes, he is really pitiful, not fierce at all, and also very aggrieved.
It is indeed his own fault that he felt wronged, which is understandable.
Shan Qihuan once again felt guilty, regretful, fearful, and other emotions in front Shen Yuhan, after being treated so ‘fiercely’ by Shen Yuhan, his mind began to lose its clarity again.
“In the middle of the night, you took a kitchen knife to chop your own palm and steamed phoenix claws2鳳爪 (fèng zhǎo): lit. phoenix claws; chicken feet. 
? Not even wearing shoes.” Shan Qihuan was frightened by him, and his expression was not very good, but he didn’t dare to make his tone be too harsh, and he tried hard to contain his worries, “Shen Yuhan, if you want to make me angry, don’t make fun of your own life!”
“Who wants to make you angry, who are you to me?” Shen Yuhan said one sentence after another, his voice was hoarse from crying all night, and he couldn’t even curse.
Shan Qihuan: “…” He almost forgot that Shen Yuhan is actually quite clever and eloquent.
An hour and a half ago, he was the one who said that the two of them wouldn’t interfere with each other in the future, and Shen Yuhan immediately used it, so there was no problem.
Being blocked and unable to speak, Shan Qihuan could only squat down in front of him and wipe his tears with his sleeves, his voice softening: “What exactly are you going to do?”
Of course, Shen Yuhan wanted to go back to Qi Kingdom, he wanted to go home, he sniffled and said: “I want to go home, I don’t want you anymore.”
Shan Qihuan looked at him, didn’t want him anymore, these words hurt his heart, but they were nothing compared to the outrageous words he said tonight, it was his choice that led to the current result.
Moreover, Shen Yuhan wanted to ‘go home’, his home was gone, where could he still have a home, it’s no wonder that he cried so miserably, Shan Qihuan felt uncomfortable in his heart, it was him who didn’t think carefully.
Shan Qihuan’s tone became a little softer again: “Then you can’t hold a knife to your wrist, if you accidentally cut yourself and bleed, you will die.”
“We won’t interfere with each other anymore, so you don’t care if I live or not.” Shen Yuhan got into an argument with him.
The roles of the two from an hour and a half ago were reversed.
Shan Qihuan sighed, if Shen Yuhan wanted to make him angry, then it had succeeded in making him angry and worried, but he didn’t want it to be this way.
Shen Yuhan turned around, didn’t want to talk to Shan Qihuan, he drew his legs into the chair and curled himself up.
“I know I spoke harshly tonight and made you angry.” Shan Qihuan wanted to salvage the situation, he wanted to move with him, but there was a dining table in front of Shen Yuhan, and he couldn’t move there.
Shen Yuhan also acted as if he didn’t want to hear what he said, covering his ears like an ostrich.
For a moment, Shan Qihuan didn’t know what to say, it was his fault first.
In fact, he regretted those words after he said them, especially when he heard Shen Yuhan crying out of breath next door, he almost couldn’t help but run over to coax him and apologize to him.
He knew why he wanted to do this, and it was because he knew that he is determined to say those words, sometimes, being calm is also a kind of torture to himself.
Perhaps, he shouldn’t cut all in one stroke3一刀切 (yī dāo qiē): lit. to cut all at one stroke; (idiomatic, figurative) to impose uniformity; to deal with it the same way despite the differences in circumstances; to do things in a one-size-fits-all approach; cut it even at one stroke—achieve Procrustean uniformity; handle different situations in the same way; make it a hard-and-fast rule; allow no flexibility., when he shut himself out4拒之門外 (jù zhī mén wài): to lock one’s door and refuse to see sb; to deny entry; to reject; slam the door in sb’s face; refuse sb’s entrance/entry; turn sb away., he also blocked Shen Yuhan out, the way he looked at him in these past few days, and the way he protected him at that time in the Shan residence, was impossible to ignore.
Maybe they could give it a try, why not give each other a chance to get to know each other, and it doesn’t have to be not interfering with each other.
Shen Yuhan ignored Shan Qihuan, who sat on the chair next to him to accompany him.
It wasn’t until Shen Yuhan, who was holding his head in a sullen mood, coughed several times, and couldn’t stop coughing, that Shan Qihuan realized something was wrong.
“Shen Yuhan, what’s wrong with you?”
He reached out and touched his wrists exposed in his pajamas, it was cold, he also touched the tops of his feet, which were also ice-cold.
Shan Qihuan didn’t care whether he was angry or not, after his coughing subsided, he directly lifted him up and carried him upstairs.
Shen Yuhan’s body suddenly flew into the air, and he hugged Shan Qihuan’s neck tightly: “What are you doing?”
Shan Qihuan glanced at his weeping face, and his heart tightened: “Go back to your room, make fun of your own body, the loss outweighs the gain5得不償失 (dé bù cháng shī): the gains do not make up for the losses (idiom); the loss outweighs the gain; to do more harm than good; one is losing more than one is gaining; the game is not worth the candle..” In the first sentence, he was talking about Shen Yuhan, and in the latter sentence, he was talking about himself, this really given away a bride and lose his army on top of it6賠了夫人又折兵 (péi le fū rén yòu zhé bīng): having given away a bride, to lose one’s army on top of it (idiom); to suffer a double loss after trying to trick the enemy; to suffer a double whammy after trying to take advantage of something..
“If you want to go back, you go back yourself.” Shen Yuhan glared at him with eyes red and swollen from crying, “Put me down, cough.” This cough took away all the momentum.
Of course, Shan Qihuan ignored him, he wore thin pajamas, hands and feet were cold, and he was still coughing, these were all signs of illness, he would not let Shen Yuhan freeze downstairs.
Also, Shen Yuhan is really light, and it doesn’t take much effort to carry him upstairs.
Shen Yuhan has anger in his heart, where would he has the presence of mind to think that his husband had good arm strength, and could carry him up to the third floor in one breath.
Shan Qihuan didn’t carry Shen Yuhan back to their wedding room, but carried him back to his room, he knew that Shen Yuhan must have wet the quilt from crying, moreover, the window in the room was not closed, it was wide open, and there was no warmth at all.
Shen Yuhan’s whole body is uncomfortable, after he calmed down, his head felt dizzy, his throat was dry, and his eyes, nose, and throat hurt.
He was tucked into the quilt on the bed by Shan Qihuan, although he was stuffed, his movements were still gentle.
Shan Qihuan first went to the bathroom to wring out a hot towel: “Wipe your face.”
Shen Yuhan wiped his face in a abandon oneself to despair7自暴自棄 (zì bào zì qì): to abandon oneself to despair; to give up and stop bothering; to give in to despair; have no urge to make progress; be resigned to one’s backwardness; From Mencius (《孟子·離婁上》): 自暴者，不可與有言也；自棄者，不可與有為也。言非禮義，謂之自暴也；吾身不能居仁由義，謂之自棄也。, With those who do violence to themselves, it is impossible to speak. With those who throw themselves away, it is impossible to do anything. To disown in his conversation propriety and righteousness, is what we mean by doing violence to one’s self. To say “I am not able to dwell in benevolence or pursue the path of righteousness,” is what we mean by throwing one’s self away. manner, then he stuffed the towel back into Shan Qihuan and turned away from him.
Shan Qihuan didn’t mind it either, he went to the bathroom to wash the towel again, and when he came out, it was still a hot towel, but this time, he lifted the lower half of the quilt and said: “Stretch out your feet.”
Shen Yuhan pulled the quilt, drew his feet up and looked at Shan Qihuan: “No.” He doesn’t show his feet to others casually!
Shan Qihuan had no choice but to pull his feet out by himself, Shen Yuhan’s feet were not as strong as Shan Qihuan’s hands, and he was defeated after struggling for a second, by the time he turned red with anger, Shan Qihuan had already wiped his feet clean with a hot towel and covered them before tucking them back into bed.
Shen Yuhan pulled the quilt up to his face and covered it with all his strength, he didn’t know whether he was blushing from anger or embarrassment!
Annoying, even though he told him not to touch his feet, he still touch them!
“Tuck the quilt in, and don’t bury your head.” When Shan Qihuan came out of the bathroom, he put his hand on Shen Yuhan’s forehead, fortunately, he didn’t have a fever, he told Shen Yuhan, “Wait for me to come back before you sleep.”
Shen Yuhan pulled the quilt under his nose and saw that he was about to go out, so he asked sullenly: “Where are you going?”
“Go downstairs and make you some cold medicine, drink it later before you go to sleep.” Shan Qihuan knew that he had to be responsible for the aftermath from the moment he exited the room, why did he really have to suffer this, no, it he reap what he sow8自作自受 (zì zuò zì shòu): to reap what one has sown (idiom); as one sows, so shall one reap; to reap what one sows; you’ve made your bed, now lie in it; to stew in one’s own juice; suffer from one’s own actions; fry in one’s own grease; be caught in one’s own trap; sow the wind and reap the whirlwind..
“Oh.” Shen Yuhan lay with his quilt in his hands, watching Shan Qihuan leave.
Tonight, he entered the bedroom where his husband used to sleep for the second time, his bed was much more spacious than the one they slept in.
He first thought of Shan Qihuan wiping his feet, and then thought of those stupid things Shan Qihuan said tonight, and how he sent him downstairs during the day, he was a little confused for a moment, his mind was full of random thoughts, but he was still angry with Shan Qihuan.
Not long after, Shan Qihuan came back and brought him a cup of brewed Chinese medicine.
Shan Qihuan told him to get up and drink the medicine: “Get up and drink it first.”
The cup is transparent, Shen Yuhan moved back when he saw the dark medicine, and didn’t want to get up to drink it: “It’s bitter.”
Shan Qihuan took a sip for him first: “It’s not bitter, it’s sweet.”
After Shen Yuhan believed him, he sat up and took the medicine, after taking a sip, he found that it was not bitter at all, so he finished the medicine in one gulp, after drinking the medicine, he directly lay down.
The quarrel was over, the medicine was drunk, and the night was getting late.
After making sure that there was nothing left to take precautions against, Shan Qihuan lay back on the bed.
He asked Shen Yuhan: “Are you asleep? Call me if you feel uncomfortable in the middle of the night.”
Shen Yuhan didn’t answer him, Shan Qihuan waited for a while without getting a reply, he looked at his face several times to make sure he was okay before turning off the light.
After all the lights were turned off, he gently nuzzled up to Shen Yuhan, kissed him on the forehead, and said in a low and hoarse voice: “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said those words to you.” He paused for a moment, and said with a bit of difficulty9難以啟齒 (nán yǐ qǐ chǐ): to be too embarrassed to mention sth (idiom); to find it hard to speak about sth; to find it difficult to speak about something; be too shy to speak out; have a bone in the throat., “You still want me, right?”
But Shen Yuhan didn’t sleep at all, after being kissed by Shan Qihuan, he endured it for a while before quietly turning over, he buried his face in the quilt.
Husband is too cunning, he actually kissed him at this time!
The author has something to say:
100 small red envelope~
Thank you to all the little angels who voted for me between 2021-03-05 12:00:00~2021-03-06 12:00:00 or irrigated me with nutrients!
Thank you to the little angel who threw the grenade: [T/N: Lots and lots of usernames]; Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!
Starting from this chapter, the following chapter is mostly around 4k, so expect more split chapters. I won’t promise the split chapter will always be posted on the same day, but I’ll try not to leave it on a cliffhanger.
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