The performance of 《Swan Lake》was originally co-organized by the Mariel State Opera and Ballet Theatre, and the pearl of the Volga River in Russia. However, a male ballet dancer temporarily sprained his foot, and a young Chinese man replaced him in the end, that person was Xiao Lisheng.
When I was watching the show, I didn’t expect that Fang Fang would have such an uncontrollable obsession with Xiao Lisheng. It wasn’t until one day when Fang Fang went out with his father and I was packing some things at home, that I stumbled upon his painting pressed under the cabinet. It wasn’t until then that I realized that Fang had already had someone in his heart before I knew it.
Originally, I thought that Fang Fang just acted on a whim. After all, Xiao Lisheng was very good-looking and a good dancer, so Fang Fang just used him as a model for painting. However, something that Fang Fang did soon after completely shattered my imagination – he actually secretly went to the theatre to watch Xiao Lisheng’s performance alone!
Only then did I realize the seriousness of the problem.
To be honest, I was opposed to Fang Fang liking a boy at first. On the one hand, this was because society was still very harsh on homosexuality, and on the other hand, like all other Chinese parents, I wanted to have grandchildren of my own. However, Fang Fang didn’t seem to realize his feelings for Xiao Lisheng. He just quietly ran to watch Xiao Lisheng perform and then painted various postures of Xiao Lisheng on the stage and hung them in his room.
I was undoubtedly jealous in my heart. I was jealous that Xiao Lisheng had seduced Fang Fang in just a few performances, and it was unintentional, leaving me with no reason to retaliate against him. Fortunately, Fang Fang himself was also ignorant. Although he ran to watch Xiao Lisheng’s performance, he only dared to sit far away, let alone talk to anyone.
I secretly followed Fang Fang to the theatre several times. I saw him sitting alone in the last row, wearing a hat and a mask, holding a binocular in his hand and looking towards the stage, like a perverted retard. It was sad and funny at the same time. But Fang Fang didn’t say anything, and I pretended not to know.
I still wanted a little Fang Fang, so I couldn’t give in so easily.
One night before going to bed, Fang Fang’s father suddenly asked me if Fang Fang had someone he liked. My heart skipped a beat and I asked him why he asked that. Fang Fang’s father said that he saw Fang Fang setting up another piece of land to plant flowers downstairs.
“It was said to be given to a person named Xiao Lisheng,” Fang Fang’s father said, “Is that a child of the Xiao family? Why don’t I seem to have any impression of it?”
“That’s not the Xiao family’s child,” I said angrily, “It’s a ballet dancer.” As I said that, I told Fang Fang’s father about Fang Fang’s inexplicable obsession with Xiao Lisheng, and finally complained to him: “Why did you have to work overtime in the first place? Do you think this kind of thing could still happen if you accompanied me instead of Fang Fang?”
Fang Fang’s father sighed and said, “Oh, this is all my fault. How about we ask Fang Fang’s attending physician if he has any suggestions.”
I said, “I asked him a long time ago. The doctor said not to stimulate him yet, and let him struggle for a while, and then he will probably get over it.” However, Fang Fang’s father and I looked at each other, feeling a little unsure. With Fang Fang’s behaviour, we were afraid that things wouldn’t go away that easily.
In the end, Fang Fang’s father and I were right to worry. Fang Fang’s feelings for Xiao Lisheng could never fade away. Every once in a while, he would go to the Provincial Theater to see Xiao Lisheng, bringing with him a large bouquet of flowers that he planted.
Although Fang Fang would also send me flowers on Mother’s Day, I quietly compared them and found that there was no comparison between the two. Mine only had one kind of flowers which were carnations, while Xiao Lisheng’s one was basically the entire garden.
Ah, my Fang Fang, my lovely Fang Fang was abducted by someone named Xiao.
I was so heartbroken that I finally realized what it meant to have a wife and forget about your mother. I secretly thought that if Fang Fang dared to bring Xiao Lisheng to me, I would have to give him a challenge.
However, one year passed, and another year passed, and Fang Fang still had not brought Xiao Lisheng to me. I was a little confused, so I secretly followed Fang Fang to the theatre again, only to realize that this guy was just there to buy soy sauce,1In short, this refers to having a low sense of presence in a certain matter/not paying attention or caring about some things. A longer explanation: The Chinese term “打酱油 (dǎ jiàng yóu)” literally means “to buy soy sauce”. The story of this phrase can be traced back to 2008 when a man in Guangzhou was asked by a journalist from Guangdong TV on the street to give his opinion on the sex scandal involving a Hong Kong star. Unwilling to make any comments, the man answered, “It is none of my business. I am just a passer-by out to get some soy sauce.” After watching the video, the netizens thought the man had avoided the sensitive topic wittily by using the expression “打酱油”. Since then, the slang term has been widely adopted by netizens to avoid talking about touchy issues. Source: https://www.chinlingo.com/articles/600824/ and he didn’t even have a sense of existence. Although Xiao Lisheng had accepted his flowers for two years, he probably didn’t even know and was sure of who he was.
I was both happy and sad at the same time. Fortunately, Xiao Lisheng didn’t know Fang Fang yet, it was also sad that Xiao Lisheng didn’t know Fang Fang!
Then one day, for some reason, Fang Fang suddenly gave all the flowers planted downstairs to the gardeners in the community, while he bought various materials such as silk, wrinkled paper, polyester, crystal, etc. to tie fake flowers at home.
Fang Fang said: “Xiao Xiao doesn’t like flowers, so I have to make plastic ones for him.”
I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. I really wanted to tell him that: My son, when he said he didn’t like it, he was actually hinting that you shouldn’t send him flowers anymore, it wasn’t because he wanted you to change to plastic ones, okay? But looking at his cheerful look, I couldn’t bear to tell him this in the end.
Maybe it might really arouse Xiao Lisheng’s curiosity? (Or was it sympathy?) Maybe Fang Fang could actually strike up a conversation with him.
However, it turned out that I was overthinking it. Fang Fang gave Xiao Lisheng fake flowers for more than two years but still didn’t say a word to him.
Now Fang Fang’s father and I were not calm anymore. Over the past few years, Fang Fang’s father and I have already become numb to Xiao Lisheng’s gender. Boys could just be with boys一as long as Fang Fang could be happy.
Fang Fang’s father told Fang Fang: “Son, just sending flowers is not enough. You have to take the initiative to go to him so that he can get to know you.”
Fang Fang lowered his head shyly and said, “But I don’t dare.”
No matter how much Fang Fang’s father and I encouraged him, Fang Fang just shook his head. Finally, when we cornered him, he simply lay on the ground and pretended to be dead.
I was a little angry and said, “If you are so timid, I don’t think Xiao Lisheng will like you.” As soon as I finished speaking, Fang Fang’s father gave me a glance, and I immediately realized that this was a serious statement.
Sure enough, no matter how much my father and I tried to persuade Fang Fang, he refused to get up from the ground and curled up with his back to us.
Fang Fang’s father and I looked at each other, both feeling helpless. I almost forgot that my son had autistic tendencies, so we couldn’t hold him to ordinary people’s standards.
I thought for a while, then leaned close to Fang Fang’s ear and told him: “Fang Fang, if you get up now, I will take you to see Xiao Lisheng next week.”
“Really?” He turned to look at me, blinked and said, “Then, can I be friends with him?”
“Of course,” I said, thinking about how to convince Xiao Lisheng to accept Fang Fang.
“Then can I invite him to live at home?” Fang Fang said excitedly, “He can sleep on my bed and I can sleep on the floor.”
Fang Fang’s father and I looked at each other, and we both felt loveless for a second.
It seemed that just packing Xiao Lisheng and sending him to bed was not enough.
#I am Fang Fang’s Observation Notebook α#
This little idiot Fang Fang really broke Baba and Mama’s2The word for baba that is used here is 耙耙 [bà bà] and Mama is 麻麻 [má má], which are homophone of 爸爸 [Dad/Father] 妈妈 [Mom/Mother]. 耙耙and 麻麻 are often used to represent the owner of the dog, the father and mother of the dog, which I think is the pun here. hearts into pieces!
