FMLB Chapter 164

Extra Chapter 19

 

Stellar Calendar 278, September 23, Clear

 

Today, the President of the Federal Military Academy contacted me. He hopes that I can participate in the school’s anniversary as an honored alum and is also interested in hiring me as a professor in the Mecha Department.

 

I don’t have any particular feelings towards the Federal Military Academy now; perhaps there was once disgust.

 

There were some incidents back then. I had gouged out the eye of a scout from the Military Intelligence Department, and later, those people retaliated against me at the Federal Military Academy.

 

For example, during the physical fitness class exams. Instead of using interstellar instruments to check the body, they used the most primitive and humiliating methods—being naked, inspected like merchandise, examining my teeth and limbs.

 

The unhealed bug wing was hidden under my clothes.

 

I couldn’t expose my bug wing, couldn’t reveal the deformities on my body. I detested it; it was my shame, my nightmare, yet it melted into my flesh, constantly reminding me of that unforgettable experience.

 

I refused the physical exam and caused a lot of trouble. During that time, I was not like a person but more like a beast. I didn’t know how to interact with others, nor did I want to. Their topics of conversation were things I didn’t understand.

 

From the beginning of interstellar restaurants to interstellar games, and later, mockery and disdain.

 

The outside world didn’t seem as beautiful as I had imagined. Actually, I never told anyone that on the night I was told to go to the Federal Military Academy, I had a slight expectation for campus life.

 

That night, lying on the ground—in the Star Sea Orphanage, I had never slept on a soft mattress, so for a long time, resting on a soft bed made me feel uncomfortable, so I hugged a blanket and slept on the floor. 

 

A thin, silky quilt draped over me, I pondered whether the dormitory beds at the Federal Military Academy were hard or soft.

 

I also remember my first step onto campus, seeing so many people, lively and full of vitality. Writing this, I realize that I actually liked this school at the beginning.

 

I once thought about how to greet new classmates, what to say. But all my expectations were shattered during that initial physical exam.

 

I was never good at socializing. The actions of the Intelligence Department just pushed me further away from the crowd.

 

A loner is either a beast or a deity. I’m not a deity and don’t want to be a beast, but I had no other choice.

 

Later, I wandered alone, and the bug wing was always an unpredictable bomb. Before it exploded, I cut it off myself, and the pain of cutting was nothing compared to that.

 

Later, I left the Federal Military Academy and stepped onto the battlefield of my first star war.

 

Looking back now on my brief campus life, besides knowledge, the only things I remember are prolonged isolation and psychological violence.

 

But compared to what I experienced at the Star Sea Orphanage, this period of time is insignificant. So over the years, I haven’t really recalled what happened at the Federal Military Academy.

 

It’s not that I’m generous, but in my memory, that isolation and gossip are indeed not worth mentioning. Like not remembering if there was a rainbow after the rain on a certain day in a certain year.

 

Yet, for some reason, I agreed to the request of the President of the Federal Military Academy. Can people really understand completely what they’re thinking?

 

When almost everyone in the school isolated me, what was I thinking? 

 

Was I thinking I was a monster, a beast? Or…

 

“Whosoever is delighted in solitude, is either a wild beast or a god.”- Aristotle

 

Now the President of the Federal Military Academy says I am the guardian of the Federation, a war god.

 

This world is truly absurd.

 

Today, when Bobo was watering flowers on the small balcony, I sat beside him. Bobo glanced up at me, his blue eyes clear as the sky.

 

I looked up at the sky and saw that today it was cloudless.

 

“Dad, are you feeling bad?” Bobo asked me softly.

 

I said, I’m thinking about something.

 

Bobo asked me what it was, and I told him that someone I once disliked, and now neither dislike nor like, invited me to revisit the old place, and I don’t know whether to go or not.

 

“Dad, you should go,” Bobo said seriously. 

 

“If Dad doesn’t want something, Dad will definitely throw it away. But a few days ago, the swallow’s nest fell down, and Dad was worried that I would be sad, so Dad didn’t know whether to throw it away.”

 

Bobo frowned seriously. 

 

“I don’t know how to say it, but I feel if Dad doesn’t go, Dad will definitely feel uncomfortable.”

 

Suddenly, I understood Bobo’s meaning. I have never been an indecisive person. Once I decide something, I will do it firmly. If I really didn’t want to go to the Federal Military Academy, I would have refused from the beginning, instead of reminiscing for so long, so long. Just as Bobo said, if I wanted to throw away the swallow’s nest, I would have disposed of it immediately. But I’m afraid Bobo would be sad.

 

There is a balance scale in my heart, one end holding rejection, the other end holding a weight heavier than rejection.

 

When I started to hesitate, my heart actually gave the answer.

 

“Dad, look, can this be eaten?” Bobo pointed to the lush green vegetables in the flowerpot, asking happily.

 

I said it should be edible. So tonight, this dish was added to the dinner table. During dinner, I mentioned the invitation from the Federal Military Academy to attend the anniversary celebration.

 

Baldy raised his hand and asked me if the Federal Military Academy was a very big kindergarten.

 

I said no.

 

Baldy asked again if there are many cartoons there.

 

I said no.

 

Disappointed, Baldy murmured and lowered his head to eat. When he heard me say, “The Federal Military Academy has mecha for babies.” 

 

Baldy instantly raised his head excitedly and shouted, “Let me see!”

 

Stellar Calendar 278, September 24, Clear

 

Ruge served us dishes and casually asked, “Are there special mecha for babies?”

 

The materials used to manufacture mecha are very expensive. In order to save materials, the assignments that the usual mecha manufacturing department students practice after class are to build small mechas. Though small, these mechas are fully functional.

 

Once they accumulate enough experience in building small mechas during their practice sessions and save up enough materials, they start investing their savings, time, and energy into creating their graduation pieces—military mechas.

 

Some of the poor students in the mecha department don’t have much money, so they usually make those practice mechas smaller and smaller after class.

 

These mini-mechas are jokingly referred to as baby mechas, specialized mechas for infants, or soothing baby mechas.

 

They can be used to soothe Baldy.

 

Stellar Calendar 278, September 24, Clear

 

Ruge told me that today is the Mid-Autumn Festival on Earth. He said that during the Mid-Autumn Festival, people eat mooncakes and appreciate the moon. However, we have to attend the anniversary celebration at the Federal Military Academy early today, so there’s no time to make mooncakes.

 

But it doesn’t matter. Ruge told me that the most important thing about the Mid-Autumn Festival is for the family to be together, complete and harmonious. May we all be blessed with long lives, and share the beauty of the moon even if we are thousands of miles apart.

 

Our whole family is in our mechas. I’m sitting beside Ruge, who’s holding Bobo, while I’m holding Baldy. We can’t see the moon, but we can see the endless starry sky.

 

Ruge told us the story of Chang’e flying to the moon. Baldy asked curiously, “Dad, are moon pills tasty?”

 

I said I didn’t know.

 

Bobo asked, “Is there really a Guanghan Palace on the moon? Is the Jade Rabbit as soft as Ruanruan? Is Chang’e even more beautiful than Dad?” He looked at Ruge as he spoke.

 

Baldy wasn’t fixated on whether moon pills were tasty anymore. He stared earnestly at Ruge and even reached out to touch Ruge’s chin and face. 

 

“Chang’e definitely isn’t as pretty as Dad.” 

 

Baldy concluded finally, and our whole family agreed.

 

After arriving at the Federal Military Academy, I asked the principal for “special mechas for babies” and got two, one for Bobo and one for Baldy.

 

I often take Baldy to the virtual arena to practice, so Baldy has an indescribable love and yearning for mechas. Perhaps in his eyes, getting into a mecha means defeating enemies easily, and the joy of winning in competitive games isn’t just for adults; little ones like Baldy love it too.

 

So when Baldy saw the small mechas, he clapped his belly happily and couldn’t wait to sit in his small mecha.

 

I’ve taught him the basic operations of the mecha. Baldy could already walk well the first time he manipulated a mecha in reality. The small mecha swung its arms and took steps seamlessly, without any stiffness or clumsiness in controlling the mecha.

 

Most adults couldn’t achieve the level of control Baldy showed just by walking the mecha. The principal of the Federal Military Academy stood by, marveling as if he were watching a precious treasure.

 

Bobo reached out curiously to touch the cold mecha shell. After touching it for a while, he looked up in puzzlement. 

 

“Dad, why doesn’t it transform into little flowers, grass, and hearts?”

 

First impressions matter, whether for people or things. The memory metal on my mecha can transform into interesting little gadgets for Bobo, so perhaps in Bobo’s heart, mechas don’t symbolize war and force, but rather a little star or a flower.

 

“Dad’s mecha is unique.” After hearing my explanation, Bobo said this. 

 

After a moment’s thought, he added, “Everything in the world is unique.”

 

There are no two identical leaves in the world. Although Baldy and Bobo are twins hatched from the same egg, their personalities are completely different. They are both my unique treasures.

 

The anniversary celebration of the Federal Military Academy is not open to the public, nor is there any live broadcast on the network. Moreover, Baldy and Bobo are sitting in their small mechas, like two little iron knots sitting beside Ruge, so I’m not worried that their photos will circulate on the star network.

 

As an honored alum, I am going to give a speech on stage.

 

I stood on the stage, with all eyes and spotlights shining on me below. The best batch of future soldiers of the Federation sat below, looking at me with anticipation and admiration. Yet my attention was focused on the three most important people in my life. I

 

 saw Ruge smiling at me, and I saw two little iron knots waving at me with the same frequency beside him.

 

My heart suddenly softened. Softened to the point where I wanted to forgive this ancient academy for the harm it had caused me.

 

It once snowed heavily on me, making me feel the biting cold. But now the ice and snow have melted, and everything in sight is vibrant. I see a new batch of students with vigorous vitality on their faces, like new shoots after the first snow melts.

 

Suddenly, a sentence came to mind.

 

“The world kisses me, I return with a song.” – Tagore

 

The world gave me pain, but later it also gave me Ruge.

 

So… I have decided to forgive it.